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Fwd: Ultra Logic

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Begin forwarded message:

>

> Date: July 7, 2012 11:25:08 AM CDT

> To: " mgims " <mgims >

> Subject: Re: Ultra Logic

>

> Seriously funny, Kishoreda.

>

> Ashok 1984

>

> Sent from my iPad

>

>

>

>> Ultra Logic

>>

>> What will happen if all businesses were treated like Ultrasonography is

>> treated? This is not as farfetched as it sounds. After all, if you argue

>> that Ultrasonography is used to kill fetuses, then pretty much everything

>> can be used to kill somebody. For example, knives can be used for cooking as

>> well as 'Cooking somebody's goose'. Clothes can be used for hanging somebody

>> or hung to dry. I could go on, but let me plunge directly into what will

>> happen.

>>

>> The moment you enter the Cookware section of the mall, a gracious attendant

>> will sidle up to you and say, " Just a moment, madam. Before you select the

>> knife for your kitchen, you will need to fill this 3 page questionnaire and

>> declaration that you are not going to cut any part of the human anatomy off

>> with it, even if your name is Bobbit! "

>>

>> You will be happy to know that only two outlets of Mac's will be

>> allowed. All the rest will be shut down, because by law one company cannot

>> run more than two outlets. The company wants Mumbai and Delhi, but the law

>> says that they should be within 10 kms of each other. Thus death by French

>> Fries will be curtailed to a large extent.

>>

>> And newspapers will scream that 20 petrol pumps were shut down, because in

>> the form declaring that the petrol will not be used for burning wives, the

>> column mentioning Jet Fuel usage was left blank. And that 15 local Kirana or

>> grocery sellers have been forced to close shop and face imprisonment of 10

>> years because they did not take the mandatory two years training in selling

>> grocery from recognized malls. This will help curb the illegal practice of

>> fattening people and killing them with life style diseases.

>>

>> And, of course, the sensational news of the day will be that 2 used tampons

>> were found discarded in the garbage bin causing endangerment of the general

>> population due to infection. Henceforth all outlets selling tampons will

>> have to maintain a register mentioning the name, address and menstrual date

>> of the user.

>>

>> And, as usual, the politicians will go scot free, because they need neither

>> registration, nor training nor any accountability.

>>

>> -Kishore Shah

>>

>>

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