my daughter

[Guest guest]

Dear Crew:

Thank you again for all the responses. Please keep them coming. I need all

the advice I can get. My anger and feeling have to be kept in check, but

they come out no matter how hard I try. I haven't been able to sleep. I am

not sick with a bad cold. I know this is because of my worry. It tears me

up inside just to see my daughter hurting. You have to know that I wouldn't

let Olivia cross the street by herself until she was 12! I'm not kidding!!

We live on a corner and it always worried me. I can't help it. I was

relieved to find out there was an error on the report for her brain mri. I

found out today that there was no error. She has a 1.5 cm AN that is just

entering the auditory canal. The two on her spine are easily taken out. He

gives Olivia a 70% chance of preserving hearing. We having talked to Dr.

Duma, the Gamma Knife doctor yet. Olivia will be 17 tomorrow. Today, she

found out that she might lose her hearing in the next month. As I write

this, we all can relate to these facts and say " Well, it could be worse, she

is lucky. " Olivia doesn't feel that way. If I am able to put my feelings

aside and concentrate on her feelings then that is what I have to tell you.

She is much more angry than I. The difference is she is angry at me. I

honestly understand these feelings, but it doesn't make it any easier to get

through them. We have all said " Why me? " Today I'm saying " Why my mom,

brother, and my daughter??? "

I want to say to those of the crew that are actively pursuing their lives

regardless of NF2 and the problems associated with it, I am in awe of you!

Yes, I'm very dramatic today. I can't help it.

kari