Guest guest Posted January 27, 2012 Report Share Posted January 27, 2012 Dear Tooah2000,A hint my professor brother gave me long ago: never say "I am uneducated about the subject" or "I don't know", say "that is outside my sphere of expertise", thereby implying that you have a sphere of expertise. Just a hint to help deal with other professors. (My expertise does not include punctuation you may notice.)Bob On 2012-01-27, at 5:11 AM, aspires-relationships wrote:Posted by: "Tooah2000" tooah2000@... tooah2000Thu Jan 26, 2012 1:32 pm (PST)You are absolutely right, . I am uneducated about the subject and I called it something that was apparently a made up name. Now I know. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 27, 2012 Report Share Posted January 27, 2012 Thank you Bob, a much better way to express my knowledge about a subject. Sometimes, actually most of the time, it is very difficult to understand all the information out there on Autism/Aspergers..etc. Is my husband's behavior typical of Autism? Aspergers? ADD? Who knows. I am slowly trying to get a handle on it, but for now, it is outside my sphere of expertise. Tooah2000 To: aspires-relationships Sent: Friday, January 27, 2012 3:54 AM Subject: Re: Digest Number 1621 Dear Tooah2000,A hint my professor brother gave me long ago: never say "I am uneducated about the subject" or "I don't know", say "that is outside my sphere of expertise", thereby implying that you have a sphere of expertise. Just a hint to help deal with other professors. (My expertise does not include punctuation you may notice.)Bob On 2012-01-27, at 5:11 AM, aspires-relationships wrote:Posted by: "Tooah2000" tooah2000@... tooah2000Thu Jan 26, 2012 1:32 pm (PST)You are absolutely right, . I am uneducated about the subject and I called it something that was apparently a made up name. Now I know. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted January 27, 2012 Report Share Posted January 27, 2012 Ah, Tooah, but your husband isnt outside your area of expertise. You are best placed to know him well, and well done to you for coming here to ask about him. At the risk of taking a sharp intake of breath.... there are co-morbidities with Asperger Syndrome, such as OCD and ADD, a mix, if you like. It does become a minefield of initials. May I suggest you get yourself a copy of the Complete Asperger by Tony Attwood, and you may well recognise some similarities there.... In my earlier posts I was attempting to say that Autism is an emotive term, as it is used to describe far more severe learning difficulties than social awkardness that Asperger Syndrome brings. AS also has sensory processing (sorry ) in there, so if you have the classic Aspie who doesnt 'hear' you and ignores you day in, day out, you can see that their immersion in the things that matter to them, might look like ADD, especially in a child. And probably is, to an extent. However rather than an inability to think or process thoughts, there is the all encompassing Asperger commitment to the interest at hand, irrespective of what is going on around them. I have to negotiate time with my partner, brokering some conversation and interaction, against his need to be isolated and do what engages him, rather than what engages me. And he doesnt do social occasions, nor does he remember special anniversaries. is correct about the labelling issue.... we've had discussions on this forum, about the 'gifted' versus the 'learning difficulty'. For my money, its about who diagnoses you, and how you are given understanding, support and skills to cope in a Non-Spectrum world. And about seeing how normal Asperger syndrome (and its bits and bobs) is, in terms of how many there are, and how much better diagnosis is, these days. When Ian was a young man no one knew why he was eccentric, pacing, muttering, non attentive, or totally absorbed in hobbies but appearing not to care about anything else. I type this, and its obvious now. But in those days, even though Asperger had made his syndrome known, people didnt pick up on it. Now, he has been diagnosed within the last decade (he is 52) and we know why he thinks certain ways, does certain things. It doesnt let him off being bombastic, but it does explain his sensory issues, his meltdowns and his desire to be alone. If you want to define your particular persons version of Asperger, look at the book, and it may well put things into perspective. And in terms of your grandson, you might see different degrees of the same traits, or something else, but all within the range of Asperger style behaviours. Once you know what those are, its a question of adjusting and understanding. The reason I am on this forum is that as a Non-Spectrum person, I was finding myself doing a lot of adjusting to fit Ian's preferences and losing myself in the process. We have now that learned that its ok for him to go off on his own in the house, and ok for him to not wish to be part of a large social scene. It is not ok for him to belittle me, ignore me or escape all the time, however! I hope you will tell us more about yourself when you can, and if you need the support of the wise ones here. You are certainly the expert, in your own life, and in your reasoning about the men in your life. They must be very pleased to have you. Judy B, Scotland To: "aspires-relationships " <aspires-relationships > Sent: Friday, 27 January 2012, 14:49Subject: Re: Digest Number 1621 Thank you Bob, a much better way to express my knowledge about a subject. Sometimes, actually most of the time, it is very difficult to understand all the information out there on Autism/Aspergers..etc. Is my husband's behavior typical of Autism? Aspergers? ADD? Who knows. I am slowly trying to get a handle on it, but for now, it is outside my sphere of expertise. Tooah2000 To: aspires-relationships Sent: Friday, January 27, 2012 3:54 AMSubject: Re: Digest Number 1621 Dear Tooah2000, A hint my professor brother gave me long ago: never say "I am uneducated about the subject" or "I don't know", say "that is outside my sphere of expertise", thereby implying that you have a sphere of expertise. Just a hint to help deal with other professors. (My expertise does not include punctuation you may notice.) Bob On 2012-01-27, at 5:11 AM, aspires-relationships wrote: Posted by: "Tooah2000" tooah2000@... tooah2000 Thu Jan 26, 2012 1:32 pm (PST) You are absolutely right, . I am uneducated about the subject and I called it something that was apparently a made up name. Now I know. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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