Jump to content
RemedySpot.com

today's funny

Rate this topic


Guest guest

Recommended Posts

public intoxication isnt really a funny matter, but i really did get a

laugh out of this, and the comments on the chicago tribune website

were even funnier.

----------

Main Story:

A man was charged with drunken driving after going through two bottles

of wine, cutting through a snowstorm on his lawn mower and riding down

the center of the street to reach a liquor store, authorities said.

Police found Kozumplik, 49, homeward bound on a Deere

tractor Saturday night, toting four bottles of wine in a paper bag,

officials said.

He told officers that his wife had taken their car to work, and that

the mower was the only way he could reach the store, two miles from home.

His blood alcohol level was 2 1/2 times Michigan's legal driving limit

of 0.08 percent, police told WLEN-FM. They arrested him and

confiscated the mower.

Kozumplik declined to comment Monday night.

------------

And for my very favorite comments on the comments board:

They once arrested me walking home from the bar. I admit it, I was

drunk, But the cop gave me a W.U.I. (walking under the influence). I

did not mind the fine but then they took away my tennis shoes for a year.

mo res

" To Heck With The Snow "

Joined: Sep 17, 2007

Comments: 4428

Warrenton, MO

----------

If only he had a plow attached to the tractor.........

----------

OK, yes, he could have hurt someone, and he was in a public roadway, BUT

1. Shouldn't it have been an MOI?(or maybe it was a Deering...)

2. Assuming it hits his auto insurance rate,(and that he has a car) is

it unreasonable to expect that he pleas it down to a non- " mo(w)ing "

violation?

3. Wonder whether the officer made him remain on the tractor while he

called it in.

4. Probable cause to search the leafbag for evidence likely to be

destroyed?

5. Yes, I, know, civil so N/A, but think the Officer was tempted to

read him his MOWranda?

6. Same facts, Sheriff Andy would have just made him sleep it off in

the Tank (assuming he left the shotgun at home).

God help him.

superfly

Northampton, PA

----------

Mow facts comin in as we speak.

-----------

I think i saw that one night on " Carson " - one of his " Carmack the

Magnificent " bit's where he gives the answer first , then the riddle:

" Drunk dude on his Deere en route to the liquor store...in a

snowstorm "

Opening the envelope: " What's green , Yellow, and White? "

California

Oakland, CA

-------------

Man, those are some EXTREMELY bad puns.....although I, too, wonder if

he was read his MOWranda rights while being arrested.

" You have the right to remain silent. You have the right to a leaf-bag

attachment. If you cannot afford an attachment, one will be provided

for you. You have the right to 2-in-1 oil. You have the right to a

landscaper. If you cannot afford a landscaper, one will be found to

mulch for you. "

Oh, the possibilities......endless.

On the flip, any tool trashed enough to bust out the tractor just to

grab some ale needs a wake-up. The cops do the community a favor by

getting a wreck like this guy out of harm's way...whether it's his or

someone else's.

fatboy2

--------------

LOL... Check the grass bagger, what kind of grass did he have in

possession???

Tarnished Sheba

---------------

My front yard covers nearly two acres and it takes time to do it.the

side yards are 150ft wide and the back yard covers 5 acres.

my lawnmower not only has a cup holder and a CD player

22HP Briggs & Stratton V-Twin

46 " steel deck for durability

True Hydrostatic Transmission with Foot Pedal Control

Easy Slide High Back Seat

3 Gallon Fuel Tank

and YES I DRINK BEER WHILE I CUT THE GRASS.

what now

Downers Grove, IL

----------

skipper wrote:

My front yard covers nearly two acres and it takes time to do

it.the side yards are 150ft wide and the back yard covers 5 acres.

Honey, that's not a yard. That's a park!

fatboy2

-------------

Wow. No GPS for REALLY good patterns? I have north of 2 acres and have

to do it with a 34 " (?) two blade walk-behind. Bet your neighbors have

tractor envy. Enjoy.

ray

Cicero, NY

-----------

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Hi All: This was hilarious. Thanks for the laugh - Shirley

Subj: today's funny

Date: 2/1/2008 9:58:05 PM Central Standard Time

From: spamthekat@...

Reply-to: thefatmanwalking_group

To: thefatmanwalking_group

Sent from the Internet

public intoxication isnt really a funny matter, but i really did get a

laugh out of this, and the comments on the chicago tribune website

were even funnier.

----------

Main Story:

A man was charged with drunken driving after going through two bottles

of wine, cutting through a snowstorm on his lawn mower and riding down

the center of the street to reach a liquor store, authorities said.

Police found Kozumplik, 49, homeward bound on a Deere

tractor Saturday night, toting four bottles of wine in a paper bag,

officials said.

He told officers that his wife had taken their car to work, and that

the mower was the only way he could reach the store, two miles from home.

His blood alcohol level was 2 1/2 times Michigan's legal driving limit

of 0.08 percent, police told WLEN-FM. They arrested him and

confiscated the mower.

Kozumplik declined to comment Monday night.

------------

And for my very favorite comments on the comments board:

They once arrested me walking home from the bar. I admit it, I was

drunk, But the cop gave me a W.U.I. (walking under the influence). I

did not mind the fine but then they took away my tennis shoes for a year.

mo res

"To Heck With The Snow"

Joined: Sep 17, 2007

Comments: 4428

Warrenton, MO

----------

If only he had a plow attached to the tractor.........

----------

OK, yes, he could have hurt someone, and he was in a public roadway, BUT

1. Shouldn't it have been an MOI?(or maybe it was a Deering...)

2. Assuming it hits his auto insurance rate,(and that he has a car) is

it unreasonable to expect that he pleas it down to a non-"mo(w)ing"

violation?

3. Wonder whether the officer made him remain on the tractor while he

called it in.

4. Probable cause to search the leafbag for evidence likely to be

destroyed?

5. Yes, I, know, civil so N/A, but think the Officer was tempted to

read him his MOWranda?

6. Same facts, Sheriff Andy would have just made him sleep it off in

the Tank (assuming he left the shotgun at home).

God help him.

superfly

Northampton, PA

----------

Mow facts comin in as we speak.

-----------

I think i saw that one night on "Carson" - one of his "Carmack the

Magnificent" bit's where he gives the answer first , then the riddle:

"Drunk dude on his Deere en route to the liquor store...in a

snowstorm"

Opening the envelope: "What's green , Yellow, and White?"

California

Oakland, CA

-------------

Man, those are some EXTREMELY bad puns.....although I, too, wonder if

he was read his MOWranda rights while being arrested.

"You have the right to remain silent. You have the right to a leaf-bag

attachment. If you cannot afford an attachment, one will be provided

for you. You have the right to 2-in-1 oil. You have the right to a

landscaper. If you cannot afford a landscaper, one will be found to

mulch for you."

Oh, the possibilities......endless.

On the flip, any tool trashed enough to bust out the tractor just to

grab some ale needs a wake-up. The cops do the community a favor by

getting a wreck like this guy out of harm's way...whether it's his or

someone else's.

fatboy2

--------------

LOL... Check the grass bagger, what kind of grass did he have in

possession???

Tarnished Sheba

---------------

My front yard covers nearly two acres and it takes time to do it.the

side yards are 150ft wide and the back yard covers 5 acres.

my lawnmower not only has a cup holder and a CD player

22HP Briggs & Stratton V-Twin

46" steel deck for durability

True Hydrostatic Transmission with Foot Pedal Control

Easy Slide High Back Seat

3 Gallon Fuel Tank

and YES I DRINK BEER WHILE I CUT THE GRASS.

what now

Downers Grove, IL

----------

skipper wrote:

My front yard covers nearly two acres and it takes time to do

it.the side yards are 150ft wide and the back yard covers 5 acres.

Honey, that's not a yard. That's a park!

fatboy2

-------------

Wow. No GPS for REALLY good patterns? I have north of 2 acres and have

to do it with a 34" (?) two blade walk-behind. Bet your neighbors have

tractor envy. Enjoy.

ray

Cicero, NY

-----------

**************Biggest Grammy Award surprises of all time on AOL Music. (http://music.aol.com/grammys/pictures/never-won-a-grammy?NCID=aolcmp00300000002548)

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You are posting as a guest. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.
Note: Your post will require moderator approval before it will be visible.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

Loading...
×
×
  • Create New...