Re: Can you improve this email to my co-workers?

[Guest guest]

Hi ,

I'm 36 and was officially diagnosed at the age of 32. I have tried disclosing

my aspergers in a few different environments. sometimes it helped, sometimes it

didn't.

I disclosed my aspergers to a group of work colleges the first time and it did

not go well.

I had assumed it would be a success because I was working with this group of

people in a health care field, working with disabled and elderly people,

providing support in their homes. We were all doing a course as for 12 moths as

part of or employment. I gave a talk in front of our first class and our

lecturer (20 people) about aspergers and ASD and explained that i had aspergers.

I had assumed that it would help and make things easier for me. I felt it would

go well as i had disclosed my aspergers in my interview, and had found a lot of

support from my superiors. the head of our department had been very happy when

i had asked if i could talk to the class. She even arranged things with my

lecturer so i could give the talk.

It did not help at all (that time!)

I ended up getting bullied very badly, and eventually I lost my job as I could

not face going to class anymore.

The lecturer was the one that was the most unsupportive and i had not counted on

that as she taught disability studies!!!

I thought long and hard about where i went wrong.

I came to the conclusion that even though i had explained what aspergers was, i

had not explained how it affected me personally.

I have since been employed in a number of different roles, some paid and some

voluntary. I have always disclosed my aspergers.

I have had more success since i started explaining my exact set of symptoms and

then explaining that why i have these challenges is because i have aspergers.

Most people are surprised at how well I cope with my challenges and offer lots

of understanding and support.

I had to learn how to advocate for myself better, and to understand the exact

parts of my personality that were the bits that made me different.

I always explain how i feel on my worst day, in the worst setting and then

explain what had made things so difficult for me in that moment.

For example:

I have an audio precessing weakness and find it hard to separate the noises i

hear into individual sounds. This makes it very difficult to understand the

teacher when there are other noises going on (like others talking when the

teacher is speaking)

I have an aversion to being touched, that i manage to deal with very well most

of the time.

This became a problem once when i had to learn how to help someone shower. We

were expected to shower another student and then i had to let them shower me

(not a situation that comes up often but it makes a good example as most people

would feel uncomfortable doing this with someone they did not know)

I explain how on the day of the class, i had arranged to do the exercise with a

friend in the class, as i had discussed my issues with this friend earlier and

she agreed to pair up with me. This was only a small thing but our lecturer

paired me instead with a very large, intimidating woman that had bullied me for

months. I had the invertible meltdown when I asked the lecturer to reconsider

and she refused. I could not do the task so I was not allowed to pass the

subject. All i needed was a little understanding and there would have been no

problem. I ended up quitting the course, as I could not cope with the lack of

support I received from a school teaching people how to support others with

disabilities, this in turn cost me my job.

I am also dyslexic, which again I cope with well.

I find it much easier to absorb information if i am presented with an example or

demonstration, instead of written notes. If I am shown what to do i learn very

fast, but if i am given a text book i will need a lot longer to go over the

information. I also need longer to do reports and any other written tasks than

most people do. I can read and write very well, just not very fast. This

usually means i end up doing more hands on tasks, rather than writing (no big

deal as I like physical tasks better anyway)

I also like to explain some of the good ways aspergers affects me and makes me

unique.

For example:

I have a talent for finding things, which has come in handy when i worked in

large hardware stores. When I am asked where an item can be found, i can call

up an image in my mind of the shelf that item is on and most of the time i can

even read the prices. Not too impressive until i explain that the store held

over 100,000 items. (it took me a long time to realise that other staff could

not do this! I was always frustrated when people asked me rather than look at

the picture inside their own head!)

I can also think in 3D, which helps when you need to pull something apart or

design and build something.

I hope this helps you find a way to explain yourself and your ASD to your

colleges.

remember that just telling someone that you have aspergers does not guarantee

understanding or support but i still find it helps me most of the time.

Don't be surprised if people ask a lot of questions about someone else they know

with an ASD. These questions are usually some variation of " My

neighbours/friends child has aspergers/autisim, can you tell me why they do . .

.. . . "

I try and sound/act supportive and explain that everyone with an ASD has a

different set of challenges and suggest places that they might find information

if they really want to know more (Internet, library, support groups etc.)

Parents of kids with ASD's are always pleased to meet me as it gives them hope

that their child will one day find acceptance and support in the adult world.

Sorry i took so long to send this reply, these thing always take me awhile

Good luck, and please let me know how it works out

Australia

[Guest guest]

ok, a little context on reaching out to my co-workers.

My initial request was for improvement of the communication, not for whether or

not the communication should be done.

I have reached out to a number of people at work. I'd like to follow up with a

written note that doesn't have links, or a label for my impairment. I'd also

like to send it (with a bit of an introduction as to why I'm sending it) to

people I haven't talked to yet.

This is a similar projects as my Birthday Letter was this year. I had to ask

250+ facebook friends if they wanted to receive an email about what happened to

me since last year.

I'm sure I could do say this more clearly, and I appreciate your patience while

I work on my thoughts.

Thanks,

Sterbal

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