Re: Just knowing helps, but only a little.

March 17, 2012

Hi. I wish there was something I could say that would help. I have a horribly

rough time of it and can barely leave the house without having some sort of

trigger set off for me that spins me into instant rage. It is very difficult to

keep that in check. My body lets everyone around me know that I'm a disaster

area. Unfortunately, my body also has developed a lot of health issues because

of all the tension, anxiety, and rage that it gets tossed into because of

certain sounds.

I don't know who you manage to go through a day having to listen to those

particular breathing patterns. I can see why your chest is tight and why you are

having trouble remembering your day. You must be in such a state of high anxiety

and agitation. I'm happy you found the group but I'm sad you have Misophonia. I

just found the group myself and just found out that I have it this past week.

I've been going through it for most of my life and I couldn't believe it had a

name and I that there was an actual physiological reason for my reactions.

I hope that you can find some relief some how.

>

> From as long as I can remember I've always hated, yes hated people when they

are eating. I have no problem with them otherwise. It started when I was young

and my parents thought I was just an angry or controlling person. One little

smack during a meal will have me glaring at you and inside, wanting to sew your

mouth closed. As with most it has only gotten worse, mostly my major triggers

are anything with chewing, forks clinking, feet rhythmically moving or tapping.

Recently I've had some really bad episodes.

>

> I work in healthcare, with ventilator patients, I'm sure some of you know

where this is going. There are certain patterns of breathing that just slowly

kill me, and some days I have to deal with it for up to 6hrs at a time, no

break. I started to notice how bad it was when I realized my chest would hurt at

the end of a shift and I felt like I didn't really remember anything from the

shift. Once I get home I start to relax and feel normal. Literally, on those

long shifts, I feel like two different people. In reflecting on a day, I feel

like my memories (during an " episode " )are from a different person. Anyway, even

being a healthcare worker, I have just recently discovered this and I does help

a little, just a little.

>

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