Dear Lord, Please give me strength!

[Guest guest]

This is all I have to keep saying to myself everyday at work because I keep noticing more trigger sounds. It is so awful. I just needed to vent to people who understand. My entire day is consumed with ruminating thoughts about the noises I hear, the anticipation of when they will come again and having my insides feel like I they are going to jump out of my skin b/c of rage and anger. Now I have noticed that one of my bosses sucks his teeth all the time - in addition to the hiccuping and snapping and desk drumming that I have been suffering with forever now. I am so worked up that I just dont know what to do with myself. I have it coming from either side of me and in front of me. I feel like I never have peace. It is bad enough to have a job that you are bothered by much of the time, but then to come in and have to be "triggered" all damn day is excruciating. I am sure many of you can relate.

I am not in a situation where I can really go to Human Resources. Its a long story but it would make things even worse if I did. What do you do with all this!? I keep my radio on low, that does nothing. I cannot wear headphones b/c I answer the phones all day. I think I must get a fan that makes a loud blowing noise right next to me and hope to drown some of it out. I have tried the simply noise website but that actually bothers me.

I am sorry.. I just needed to vent to people who can relate to how I feel.