Making the body transparent -- and the cotton ball story

[Guest guest]

Someone emailed me a meditative technique to try knowing my history of being

sensitive to other people's energies and emotions. Her suggestion triggered me

to remember a recent experience I had, as well as an explanation about how

Misophonia can be described to non-sufferers. Some may resonate with my

experiences. Others may not. But I thought it was worth sharing -- and I really

think it may benefit some people if their like me.

MY EMAIL REPLY:

I belong to another group — a more spiritual one — where one discussion

mentioned the energy fields in and around the body. Someone shared a meditation

where we focus on the energy field that occupies the same space as the body. The

point is to shift focus away from the physical body to the pulsating and

swirling energies that are all throughout and around the physical shape. With

more awareness on this essence energy (which actually feels more like my true

self), there comes a decrease in physical awareness, and the physical body

starts to feel transparent or " less there " .

The other day, while I was trying this meditation, my dog started lightly

panting next to me. I could feel the sound hit my skin. I thought " hey, you're

meditating, these sounds shouldn't bother you " -- but they were. However,

because of the specific meditation I was doing, I decided to not only focus on

the energy field, but to purposely imagine my body as transparent and

" out-of-phase " -- with the intent to let the sounds travel through me.

And it was working!!!

....

I'm starting to think that more people " feel " sounds that realize it. My theory

is that people who suffer from Misophonia have a few extra senses turned on,

where their hearing is extended to their skin and energy field.

When I'm bothered by sounds, it feels like they're literally hitting my body

like little darts. The darts are so small and spread out that no single little

dart causes pain — but the repetitiveness of being hit by a throng of darts each

time particular sounds are " let loose " into the air — well it just wears on the

nerves.

Imagine minding your own business, just sitting reading a book or working (or

whatever), and then you're hit by a cotton ball — then another — then another.

You don't know when or where the next one will land. You know you're not being

physically harmed, but they just keep coming, making it more and more difficult

to concentrate on whatever it is your doing. Eventually you find yourself on

edge, not able to do anything but wait for the next cotton ball.

Now imagine that a small sound is represented by one small cotton ball, and a

loud sound is represented by a sheet of cotton. Small sounds are not usually

constant, they tend to come in intervals — and many times with no pattern — so

you never know when the next will arrive. Louder noises are usually more

constant and feel like a sheet of cotton being pressed against your entire body

equally. Because it hits your entire body equally and is more constant, you're

not waiting for the next wave to hit. PLUS — and here's an important point —

louder sounds have the capability to penetrate your body instead of bounce off.

When it penetrates, it feels more a part of you. When sounds bounce off, it

feels more foreign and attack-like.

Then to bring it one step further, if the sounds get too loud, the sheet of

cotton starts to feel like a sheet of gravel that pelts your body — but more

around your head and ears. Then you start to experience pain. The entire body

feels the sound like a powerful wave, partially hitting the body, and partially

penetrating the body. Sometimes I feel like a really loud sound could knock me

off my feet.

Wow, this cotton ball story just came out of nowhere. But I think it's a really

good explanation for those who don't suffer from Misophonia to have a better

understanding of how it feels.

It's why waterboarding is illegal — anyone can handle a few drops — but the

extended experience is torture.

Kat