Been around him to long

[Guest guest]

I don't know if I would cry if my father died. How much can a person close to

you be loved when they are always close in the wrong way? It should matter that

he only behaves according to what he believes is right, or that he is only

responding to his own uncontrollable feelings, yet my own feelings belie,

appose, and shape my sense of rationality, negating it's purpose for existing.

I don't believe that he wants to cause me pain, or blames me for my temperament

when he knows damn well who I get it from. He always somehow manages to be in

the wrong place at the wrong time, almost like it was planned; always making the

noises that I hate when I am least able to deal with it, in the worst moments,

in the worst possible way in the worst possible situation consistently against

insurmountable odds in ways that one could not possibly plan; always saying the

wrong things as a result of his own mental dysfunction, never understanding,

always hypocritical, always preaching at me, always upset with me as I am with

him. My father would always be annoying, though half of these things would not

have taken place were it not for my selective sensitivity and resulting

irritable disposition; exacerbated by someone who never really had any business

with children, as he literally has mild retardation.