Hello, This is my Story

[Guest guest]

My Name is , I have been a lurker on this group for a while now, I

guess I should put my story out there

I have 4 children... My 8 year old daughter Kendra, has been diagnosed with

Autism. She is considered lower functioning with the mentality of

approximately a 24 month old. ( No mental retardation detected) She is also

thought to have Bi-polar and since we moved to South Dakota has been treated

as such...

When Kendra was 20 months old, we went to the pediatrician (in Florida,

which is where we are originally from) and she got 3 shots all at one

time... That night she was running a high fever and her legs swelled (A LOT)

when I called the pediatrician I was told to give her Benadryl and she will

be fine.. being a young mother of 19 I did as I was told... when she

" recovered " she was not the same... Before this incident Kendra was " Normal "

(I hate using the word!) If there was anything that was different from

Kendra as a child before that, is she hardly ever cried, and was easy to

please. Immediately after this incident I started saying something was wrong

with Kendra, and EVERYONE said, " Oh don't worry she is just a late bloomer "

as which I countered, " No, she was doing {insert milestone here} 3 months

ago, and now she isn't " But, I was a young mother, and I " didn't know

anything about children "

By this point I was pregnant with my 2nd child, Kamden, Whom was born when

Kendra was 2 years and 3 months old... ( 7 months after Kendra " changed " )

By this point was starting to do research, and speaking to OTHER

pediatricians that would listen to me, and not tell me I didn't know what I

was talking about. (by this point I was staying in TN for a short time)

Kendra was diagnosed with Autism, (which I initially bucked the diagnosis, I

didn't want to believe that something was really wrong with her... young mom

denial I guess) and we started the journey of " learning " what all this

was...

In the meantime, I allowed Kamden to get vaccines, until we hit the point

where they wanted to give him the same combination of shots that Kendra got

( MMR, Hep b, and chickenpox) at which point I signed a religious exemption

form stating that I didn't want him to be vaccinated. (and OHH the hell I

received at the Health Department for this decision! The HEAD HONCHO of the

health department came to speak with me and convince me otherwise (this was

back in Florida) But by this point I had done a good deal of research and at

least scratched the surface of the idea that vaccines may or may not have

something to do with the increasing number of Autism. I remember crying as

the lady at the health department all but called me a bad mother for not

wanting to vaccinate my child any further until I knew more about this and

that... I just kept saying I wouldn't be able to live with myself if Kamden

got hurt because of a decision I made...

Kamden and Kendra were both vaccinated (one shot at a time) after they were

4 1/2 years old to get ready for school...

Fast Forward to Today:

Kamden (6) has ADD so bad that at best he has a 40 second attention span at

best, and has been given the label of " developmentally delayed " to " Learning

Disability " in school, He has been put on medication in an attempt to curb

this ADD and to better help him focus with mediocre results.

Kendra (8) has responded beautifully from the medication that the

Pediatrician here in Sioux Falls has recommended, and now speaks in full

sentences (still echoalia, but for the most part the echoes that she uses

for the situation is appropriate - before we came to South Dakota she was

non-verbal, so this is a MAJOR improvement) she uses a pictures board, and

we are learning more about each other with each passing day...

Both Kendra and Kamden suffer from chronic constipation, which requires us

to give a daily dose of Mira lax in order to control it and feed them a diet

high in fiber (which isn't always easy with Miss Picky Kendra)

Kayden my 2 year old, whom stopped getting shots at approximately a year old

(even then they were only given 1 at a time, with at least a week apart)

does not seem to have any developmental delay, he is smart, social, and very

active and actually surpassing his milestones at a rapid rate of speed!

(who was just born March 1st 2012) has only received the Vitamin K

and Hep B shots that they give when the children are first born (which I

didn't exactly consent too, I was just told he had received them)

Now, this kind of leaves me confused, if you look at the differences of each

of my children... It makes me wonder... are Vaccines truly innocent in this

equation?

Am I just a paranoid mother? How should I proceed with my two youngest who

still need shots before school?

Further, I am still just now learning about all of the available programs,

and resources in this area for Kendra to help her continue to blossom...

Does anyone have any links that would be helpful?

Where do I go from here? I feel like I am lost in a sea of information, NO

ONE in my family (or my husband's family) has ever had to deal with a child

with disabilities, and when I ask them for advice they turn a blind eye to

it all ( Another contributing factor to why we now live in South Dakota and

our family isn't still in Florida) The worst that I have in my family is

Depression and Bi-polar

Kendra is also a girl, and she is starting to show the early signs of

puberty... THIS PETRIFIES ME!!! Kendra is still in pull-ups, we still work

with her with potty training in hopes that she gets it one day, but so far

no luck... we can actually get her to potty in the toilet 1 out of 10

times...

What and how does one deal with puberty and all that goes with it? I can

only imagine how those hormones will affect her, and her period... How does

one deal with that? Her bowel movements are pretty traumatic for her

already.. as she is hyper sensitive ( is that the right term?) and it takes

a lot of patience (on both of our parts) to clean her completely down

there. I've heard of people using birth control to " time " such events like

Periods in children with disabilities... have any of you tried this? Did it

work?

Well, anyway this is our story... I hope it wasn't too long winded... Any

information that anyone can provide would be awesome... I'm still

learning... and would love to learn more from those who have more experience

and found things that help...

Thanks