Re: Re: Fear of ongoing sounds

[Guest guest]

I am in the exact situation. My quiet upstairs neighbor just moved out. As I posted earlier, I got my building manager to agree to put in a soundproofing barrier beneath the carpet -- or hardwood floor if they end up doing that -- in the apartment above me at my expense (about $1,000 for a 350 sq. ft. apt.) I am still waiting to hear if he was able to get approval from the owner. So, you might consider that. If the apt. is next door, it could be more complicated, though.As for needing to know where the sound is coming from, I've got that too. It makes sense if we are responding to sounds as threats to need to know where that threat is coming from. Also, as for being attuned to patterns, I suspect that has a similar root. If you come from an abusive family, things can be pretty unpredictable. One way

of coping is becoming attuned to patterns in order to predict what will happen next. I can imagine myself as a baby trapped in a crib, being very attuned to the footsteps of my two-year-old and four-year-old brothers. I'm guessing from my later experience that they did whatever they wanted to me while my overwhelmed mother wasn't paying attention. What do others think? Subject: Re: Fear of ongoing soundsTo: Soundsensitivity Date: Wednesday, February 8, 2012, 9:18 AM

I seem to get some satisfaction out of knowing where the sound is coming from too. Don't know why that is...

I've noticed that for some people, they have to make noises etc to get attention. That's just how they are.

And for the anticipation... just shoot me now! I live in an apartment and the people (hardly ever home and fairly quiet) just moved out. Ye Gads! A day doesn't go by that I'm not terrified of who is moving in next. Loud talkers? Loud music? Loud car? Kids running in the apartment? Young people who have cars coming in and out at all hours of the day and night? Oh Calgon, take me away... but where? This is the quietest place I've lived in a very long time. I don't want anything to come that will spoil that... And I'm so worried it will.

And the beat goes on...

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> So I guess it's an intolerance, sensitivity, and fear of sounds. Wow. I hadn't thought about the repetitiveness aspect, but I think I understand how that could tie in to the fear. Can you tell me more about that?

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> The lady hiccuping and the guy snapping and drumming--these things would drive me crazy and they just seem rude on top of it all. In another discussion we were talking about the manners aspect of this, which I think ties in to feeling violated. What do you think?

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[Guest guest]

I would love to do that but I am so fearful of his response. He was "ok" when I had asked him to stop whistling but still looked at me with that "weird look". I almost feel like its a two part equation - 1) he has a bad habit and may not realize it, BUT 2) b/c he knew the whistling annoyed me, I think he somehow knows this bothers me b/c I have mumbled under my breath when he walks by snapping so he continues to do it.

Whichever way it is, it is AWFUL! I have casual conversation with him every now and again and he is a pretty nice guy but I am so afraid to really say something. I have explained to my other coworker and she sort of brushed it off and made light of it. She is the one constantly with the hiccups. I think she just needs to go to a doctor b/c no one hiccups that much! I had even casually brought it up to one of my bosses but they laugh it off, perhaps I wasn't serious enough or they don't realize this is a real disability nor do they really care to be honest. Unfortunately there is no where they can really move me b/c I sit within a specific group that I have work with, so I don't know what choice I have. I guess I feel stuck between a rock and hardplace.

The only resolve would be for me to say something to this guy in an apologetic way that it is me, not him and its something that I struggle with as a disorder. I just don't know how receptive he will be nor do I know how quiet he will be about telling this to others and having me become the butt of people's jokes.

EcuednyjCould you print out something from the internet nd highlight your triggers and how they effect you and present it to him? Or is he just an inconcideratr @34hole? If so could you show it to someone who has the power to move you? This is a disability and they should do their best to provide you with a workable enviroment. Something like handi cap bathroom access. You can't be at your best when your mind is concentrating on talking yourself down from rage and fear.Sent from my Samsung Interceptâ„¢

[Guest guest]

Good for you. I think you will be surprised how supportive people can be and how

relieved they are to find out that you don't just dislike them:-)

Sent from my Samsung Interceptâ„¢