IN RESPONSE TO BRYAN ON GRIEF AND CHONIC ILLNESS

June 22, 2012

With respect to feeling like not going on, if i understood you correctly, when

it feels like you can't take it any more are you looking at the whole of all

your life and seeing everything as loss and failure to meet strong expectations.

I imagine it's hard for you dealing with pressure of living up to the 'male

model.' Combine that with not sleeping, feeling unwell, feeling alone and all

the other factors coming into play in lieu of this it no doubt feels

overwhelming. Maybe it would help to just try taking an hour at a time and in

that hour try to see the good things you still are despite any illness and don't

make yourself have to be in any set mold. Easier said than done? Just trying to

help you 'break it down' and remember the illness process at times may be

inducing some of what you're feeling and if you can think in the moment that

there can be a next moment lighter and something brighter about to happen, can

that help you to see in a different

way? I don-t believe i have all the answers. I can empathize w/ your pain and

it gets easy to start feeling like you described and i'm wanting to remind you

the illness and its impacts can be ugly but you the person aren't. Do u have a

dr you trust and feel listens to you you could tell about feeling as you do?

That's an option if you have ond and anyone who you believe is undertsanding and

objective and warm, caring. Then if you have someone like that could you send me

a copy so i could 'scan' it? Him/her? Don't know if visiting the group ever

helps you or helps you feel less alone. Hope when you see this something helps

and if some of what you're feeling isnt improving call to a drs attention who

hopefully knows something. Hang in there! P.S. Typos are dirty devils. Sorry

everyone. I need 'puter white out'

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