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FUNNY THINGS ABOUT MOMS

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Funny Thing About Moms

Enjoy the answers given by elementary school age children

to the following questions:

Why did God make mothers?

* 1. She's the only one who knows where the scotch tape is.

* 2. Mostly to clean the house.

* 3. To help us out of there when we were getting born.

How did God make mothers?

* 1. He used dirt, just like for the rest of us.

* 2. Magic plus super powers and a lot of stirring.

* 3. God made my Mom just the same like he made me. He just

used bigger parts.

What ingredients are mothers made of?

* 1. God makes mothers out of clouds and angel hair and

everything nice in the world and one dab of mean.

* 2. They had to get their start from men's bones. Then

they mostly use string. I think.

Why did God give you your mother and not some other mom?

* 1. We're related.

* 2. God knew she likes me a lot more than other people's

moms like me.

What kind of little girl was your mom?

* 1. My Mom has always been my Mom and none of that other

stuff.

* 2. I don't know because I wasn't there, but my guess

would be pretty bossy.

* 3. They say she used to be nice.

What did mom need to know about dad before she married him?

* 1. His last name.

* 2. She had to know his background. Like is he a crook?

Does he get drunk on beer? Does he make at least $800 a year? Did he say NO to

drugs and YES to chores?

Why did your mom marry your dad?

* 1. My dad makes the best spaghetti in the world. And my

Mom eats a lot.

* 2. She got too old to do anything else with him.

* 3. My grandma says that Mom didn't have her thinking cap on.

Who's the boss at your house?

* 1. Mom doesn't want to be boss, but she has to because

dad's such a goofball.

* 2. Mom. You can tell by room inspection. She sees the

stuff under the bed.

* 3. I guess Mom is, but only because she has a lot more to

do than dad.

What's the difference between moms and dads?

* 1. Moms work at work and work at home, and dads just got

to work at work

* 2. Moms know how to talk to teachers without scaring

them.

* 3. Dads are taller and stronger, but moms have all the

real power 'cause that's who you got to ask if you want to sleep over at your

friend's.

What does your mom do in her spare time?

* 1. Mothers don't do spare time.

* 2. To hear her tell it, she pays bills all day long.

What would it take to make your mom perfect?

* 1. On the inside she's already perfect. Outside, I think

some kind of plastic surgery.

* 2. Diet. You know, her hair. I'd dye it, maybe blue.

If you could change one thing about your mom, what would it

be?

* 1. She has this weird thing about me keeping my room

clean. I'd get rid of that.

* 2. I'd make my Mom smarter. Then she would know it was my

sister who did it and not me.

--------------------------------------

~ " We all take different paths in life, but no matter where we go, we take a

little of each other everywhere. " ~

~ " If I could reach up and hold a star for every time you've made me smile, the

entire evening sky would be in the palm of my hand. "

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