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OUT OF THE MOUTHS OF BABES.

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A Sunday school teacher asked her class, " What was Jesus' mother's name? "

One child answered, " . "

The teacher then asked, " Who knows what Jesus' father's name was? "

A little kid said, " Verge. "

Confused, the teacher asked, " Where did you get that? "

The kid said, " Well, you know they are always talking about Verge n'.

***********

KIDS IN CHURCH

3-year-old, Reese:

" Our Father, Who does art in heaven, Harold is His name.

Amen. "

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A little boy was overheard praying:

" Lord, if you can't make me a better boy, don't worry about it.

I'm having a real good time like I am. "

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A Sunday school class was studying the Ten Commandments.

They were ready to discuss the last one.

The teacher asked if anyone could tell her what it was.

Susie raised her hand, stood tall, and quoted:

" Thou shall not take the covers off the neighbour's wife. "

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

After the christening of his baby brother in church, four year old sobbed

all the way home in the back seat of the car.

His father asked him three times what was wrong.

Finally, the boy replied, " That preacher said he wanted us brought up in a

Christian home, and I wanted to stay with you guys. "

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

I had been teaching my three-year old daughter, Caitlin, the Lord's Prayer for

several evenings at bedtime, she would repeat after me the lines from the

prayer.

Finally, she decided to go solo.

I listened with pride as she carefully enunciated each word right up to the end

of the prayer:

" Lead us not into temptation, " she prayed, " but deliver us some E-mail.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

One particular four-year-old prayed:

" And forgive us our trash baskets as we forgive those who put trash in our

baskets. " ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A Sunday school teacher asked her children, as they were on the way to church

service,

" And why is it necessary to be quiet in church? "

One bright little girl replied, " Because people are sleeping. "

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Six-year-old Angie and her four-year-old brother were sitting together in

church.

giggled, sang, and talked out loud.

Finally, his big sister had had enough.

" You're not supposed to talk out loud in church. "

" Why? Who's going to stop me? " asked.

Angie pointed to the back of the church and said, " See those two men standing by

the door?

They're hushers. "

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A mother was preparing pancakes for her sons, , 5 and 3.

The boys began to argue over who would get the first pancake.

Their mother saw the opportunity for a moral lesson.

" If Jesus were sitting here, He would say, 'Let my brother have the first

pancake, I can wait.' "

turned to his younger brother and said, " , you be Jesus! "

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A father was at the beach with his children when the four-year-old son ran up to

him, grabbed his hand, and led him to the shore where a seagull lay dead in the

sand.

" Daddy, what happened to him? " the son asked.

" He died and went to Heaven, " the Dad replied.

The boy thought a moment and then said, " Did God throw him back down? "

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A wife invited some people to dinner. At the table, she turned their

six-year-old daughter and asked, " Would you like to say the blessing? "

" I wouldn't know what to say, " the girl replied.

" Just say what you hear Mommy say, " the wife answered.

The daughter bowed her head and said, " Lord, why on earth did I invite all these

people to dinner? "

~ " We all take different paths in life, but no matter where we go, we take a

little of each other everywhere. " ~

~ " If I could reach up and hold a star for every time you've made me smile, the

entire evening sky would be in the palm of my hand. "

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