Re: Sheila/Hospice

[Guest guest]

This disturbs me, Jan. In that no one seems to have been giving the

poor man anything to relieve the pain that occurs during the process

of dying. Was anyone doing anything for him?

Shouldn't the nursing home have called Hospice if they were not there

at that time?

My sister had Hospice, and they were totally wonderful.

They kept her on a morphine medication drip. Then, when she was

reaching end stage they were there, and even told her it was time to

close her eyes and let go. She asked her husband to read Romans

14:7,8, and then she closed her eyes and died.

Hospice were some of the greatest people she had during all her

illness. They never let her suffer. She had heart failure. This was

in Ft. Myers Florida where Our dear Carol lives with the Manatees.

I sure hope there aren't many Hospice like you described.

Love a lot,

Imogene

>

> Hi Sheila,

> Where do you live, because I had the samething happen when my

husband lived at home 24/7 and Hospice came to evaluate him. I was

really struggling with him, but he coud talk and understand and

answer questions the person asked. And she said he did not qualify

for Hospice. She gave me a brochure to a caregiver agency, but I

didn't need that, I already had a caregiver. I needed help 24/7 that

was affordable, but I couldn't find it. I eventually admitted my

husband to a nursing home and spent down, so he would qualify

for Medicaid to help pay the nh and he has been there a little over

two years. One year after he was there, he got a very bad UTI

(Sepsis) and was hospitalized for 10 days and he qualified for

Hospice when he returned from the hospital to the nh. Hospice stayed

with him for 4 months and then said he didn't need them anymore and

they said good-bye. So, Hospice is not something to depend on for

full time help if you need them for the rest

> of your mother's life, unless she is really showing she is not

thriving. That is my experience anyway. Also, one of my husband's

roommates was on Hospice at the nh. His family requested Hospice for

him when he was failing. He had AD. I am at the nh for several hours

everyday and I never once saw Hospice come in to see the man. They

probably came in the early, early  morning when I was not there, but

that man died and no one was there for him and I sat with him all

night and was there when he died. Not once was Hospice there for him

while dying. His daughter came in the afternoon to see him and he was

in the dying process, but Hospice had told her on the phone it could

be a few more days, so she left after about an hour with him and that

night when she was not there, I sat with him and talked to him. I

thought that was the job of Hospice. It was shocking to me that not

one person was there for this man, not even the staff at the nh. They

would come in

> and check to see how he was doing periodically, but not one person

sat with him.

> I felt so sorry for this man, I put Jim in bed and drew the

curtains and sat with the man on the other side. When he died, the

CNA and nurse asked me what time he had died. I didn't know that was

my job to keep track of, I was just there for him. I gave them an

estimation, because I really didn't look at the clock at the precise

moment. I was saying a little prayer for the poor man when he died.

> Now, here is the Godincidence, as Sandie says. Not knowing this man

would die that night, Jim and I had been sitting outside during the

day on the nh patio and there were some beautiful roses and one was a

rose bud and I picked it and put it in Jim's buttonhole of  his

shirt. I've never done this before and it was for no special

occasion, I just felt like doing it.

> That night, I knew exactly why I had picked that rose bud, it was

for the man that died and I left it on his bed after he died and his

daughter saw it when she arrived and she  e-mailed me a very nice

letter and said that she was going to throw the rose in with her

father. That was so special to hear.

> You might try and see if you have PACE in your area. They do in-

home care and it is with Medicare or Medicaid. Here is the website

about it.

> http://www.medicare.gov/nursing/Alternatives/Pace.asp

>

>

>

> Hospice

>

> My mom is doing worse.  the Dr. suggested Hospice.  They came to

> evaluate her and they said that since she could speak and

understood

> what we were saying she probably wouldn't qualify.  I don't

understand,

> she can not walk without assistance, she can't do anything without

> assistance, Her tremors are so bad she can't eat or brush her

teeth. 

> She is delusional, thinks dad is trying to hurt her, and she get

upset

> if I'm not there. 

> Has anyone else had problems with people not understanding about

LBD? 

> They think it is like Alzhiemers, with the memory problems,  mom

> doesn't have that problem, but her symptoms are just as bad.  It

gets

> so frustrating.  I don't know what to do.  I would also like to

know

> what to expect.  All the DR's say is that there is no cure and she

will

> go down hill fast. I feel like no one understands what I am going

> thru.  I'm worried I can't do it but I have to because there is no

one

> else except Dad and he is not well either. 

> thanks for listening!

> Sheila 

>

>

>

> ------------------------------------

>

> Welcome to LBDcaregivers. 

>

>