Re: inquiry on 's family should like me....ha ha

[Guest guest]

Hey , nice work - I read the title and my first thought was

" my family don't even know you " :-)

Another possible belief could be " They don't like me " - maybe skip

straight to the turnaround " They do like me " - they seem to like you

enough to spend Christmas Day with you... can you find other examples

of how they like you?

And seems like there are some beliefs about drinking, people that

drink, etc in there.

With thanks,

Jon

[Guest guest]

hi jon ~

i'm looking at finding how they might like me.  it is difficult. my mind goes to

'they had no choice, john invited me', etc...i'm going to sit with it for awhile

as it feels imprtant to me.  and you are right.  i have lots of inquiry to do

about the consumption of alcohol.  i have avoided it so far in the attempt to

look at the 'triggers' that move me in the direction of consuming what i

personally feel is 'too much' for me, in my own opinion.  it does keep coming up

though.

i drank too much

1.  yes

2. no, i can\t absolutley know that.  i can't know what too much is even or what

an appropriate amount would look like. 

3. when i believe that thought i am full of regret, i replay the evening and

beat myself up for not having more self control.  i see myself as pathetic and

stupid, of creating a situation that made it impossible for john's mother to

think well of me.  i see myself as hopeless. 

4.  without the thought i would see thing more clearly, i could look at what

happened and perhaps understand my self more.  i might have some compassion for

myself, i might be able to understand my nervousness and my fear, i might see my

innocence. 

TA.  i didn't drink too much.  this is true.  i drank what i drank, and the

impulse to do so was based on what i as beleiving at the time.  as i have heard

katie say, we have to do what we do based on what we are thinking at the

time...and we will repeat it until we question our thoughts.  when the story

changes the drinkng will leave me.....soemthing like that.

i drank what i needed to drink. (and that can change) 

my thinkng drinks too much.  yes..i keep thinkng about how much i drank and am

drunk with regret about the evening.

anyone see any other turn arounds? 

i still see that i may choose to drink less in the future, i may not serve

me....and that it is pointless to try to change what already happened.

Subject: Re: inquiry on 's family should like me....ha ha

To: Loving-what-is

Received: Friday, December 26, 2008, 5:10 PM

Hey , nice work - I read the title and my first thought was

" my family don't even know you " :-)

Another possible belief could be " They don't like me " - maybe skip

straight to the turnaround " They do like me " - they seem to like you

enough to spend Christmas Day with you... can you find other examples

of how they like you?

And seems like there are some beliefs about drinking, people that

drink, etc in there.

With thanks,

Jon

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[Guest guest]

Hi ,

Some thoughts:

They had no choice - really?! Did he force them to do it, threaten

them - perhaps blackmail them with their deepest, darkest secrets? :-)

Another turnaround - might make sense, might not - I drank too little....

I didn't drink too much - just enough to bring this stuff up (I often

find stressful thoughts come up after eating 'too much', the 'wrong

stuff', etc - and not just the food, about all kinds of stuff - it's

like eating the 'wrong stuff' slows me down enough to look at stuff,

takes me into the stuff I don't want to look at).

Another area that could be useful - look at your beliefs about people

that drink 'too much'....

People that drink too much are ......

or even

People that drink are .....

Jon

[Guest guest]

jon ~ 

 

thanks, i laughed thinking of how john could have possibly 'forced' his mother

and son to have christmas dinner with me ! 

 

and i like the insight about having drunk just enough.  that works for me.. i

have noticed that the situation was perfect in that it is showing me beliefs

that i have held on to yet have managed to ignore or keep hidden...i see them

clearer in this context than i ever have...this is good.

 

i'm going to do some more work on the drinking aspect of things.

 

cheers =o)

 

cath

Subject: Re: inquiry on 's family should like me....ha ha

To: Loving-what-is

Received: Sunday, December 28, 2008, 11:25 AM

Hi ,

ss

Some thoughts:

They had no choice - really?! Did he force them to do it, threaten

them - perhaps blackmail them with their deepest, darkest secrets? :-)

Another turnaround - might make sense, might not - I drank too little....

I didn't drink too much - just enough to bring this stuff up (I often

find stressful thoughts come up after eating 'too much', the 'wrong

stuff', etc - and not just the food, about all kinds of stuff - it's

like eating the 'wrong stuff' slows me down enough to look at stuff,

takes me into the stuff I don't want to look at).

Another area that could be useful - look at your beliefs about people

that drink 'too much'....

People that drink too much are ......

or even

People that drink are .....

Jon

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