Guest guest Posted December 24, 2008 Report Share Posted December 24, 2008 Hi I deal with this a lot, too, and found that *trying* to make connections never works. Instead, I go where I want to go and do what I want to do. If I happen to meet someone with whom I make a special connection for friendship, that's great. I have a suspicion that people can sense when we're *trying* and they don't respond well. So.. just go where you want to go and do what you want to do. ~Chani ~*~ everyone always say how the best places to meet people are in social circles. and everyone also seem to agree that the need for company is natural thing. i dont know much about anything, but i do know that im lonely, and every small encounter with people feels so good, that when its gone i suddenly know whats missing in my life. in my line of work i work alone at home, maintaining my old relationships for the lack of new ones. and it seems that other people my age do find happiness in social circles and make friends, human connection, and romantic partners. if all this seems like i try to justify the reasons for which i think are responsible for my loneliness, then it's true. so i ask you.. why should my solution be to mess with my internal programming to eliminate the need for company? isn't it possible that the simple answer is the right one? that i should enter more social circles? i sit home weeks, months, years, never go anywhere.. dreaming that someday the girl of my dreams will drop down on me from the sky.. how stupid is that? Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted December 24, 2008 Report Share Posted December 24, 2008 Hi Facy, I assume that when you say " why should my solution be to mess with my internal programming to eliminate the need for company? " you mean that is what you are using the work for. If so, you might want to take a look at that - the work is not about making ourselves be a certain way, simply looking at what is stressful for us and seeing what's there. Maybe the simple answer is to enter more social circles, etc. If so, why aren't you doing that? Maybe the truth is that you don't want to do that right now, contrary to what you think you want. Maybe explore your reasons for not entering more social circles (they won't like me, etc.) As the quote goes: " You're either attaching to your thoughts or inquiring. There's no other choice. " Jon Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted December 24, 2008 Report Share Posted December 24, 2008 facy.. well if your like me. you probably introverted and became withdrawn because you were hurt by people. i could be wrong.. The thing is it is our stories that hurt us. You know how katie says no one can hurt me thats my job. WE hurt ourselves with our stories. Despite knowing that im still an introvert . I just prefer it. Or maybe i just have not done the work enough to be clean on it. Happy holidays, roslyn -- In Loving-what-is , " facy102 " wrote: > > everyone always say how the best places to meet people are in social > circles. > and everyone also seem to agree that the need for company is natural > thing. > i dont know much about anything, but i do know that im lonely, and > every small encounter with people feels so good, that when its gone i > suddenly know whats missing in my life. > in my line of work i work alone at home, maintaining my old > relationships for the lack of new ones. > and it seems that other people my age do find happiness in social > circles and make friends, human connection, and romantic partners. > if all this seems like i try to justify the reasons for which i think > are responsible for my loneliness, then it's true. > so i ask you.. why should my solution be to mess with my internal > programming to eliminate the need for company? > isn't it possible that the simple answer is the right one? that i > should enter more social circles? > i sit home weeks, months, years, never go anywhere.. dreaming that > someday the girl of my dreams will drop down on me from the sky.. how > stupid is that? > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted December 25, 2008 Report Share Posted December 25, 2008 This reply contains one of my favorite beliefs to question. The first time I did it, I spent about 3 days rolling with laughter every time I thought about it. Which belief? " People can hurt me. " Love, ~ -- ~ , MA " This is no social crisis. This is you having fun. " - The Who, " Another Tricky Day " Instant Advanced Meditation - Free Sample & Lifetime Guarantee <http://www.advancedmeditation.com/cmd.php?af=570391> http://www.advancedmeditation.com/cmd.php?af=570391 Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted December 25, 2008 Report Share Posted December 25, 2008 Have you considered taking a job where you are in more contact with people? Perhaps in a large company so there are opportunities for different types of social contact. Vivian stuff that bothers me everyone always say how the best places to meet people are in social circles. and everyone also seem to agree that the need for company is natural thing. i dont know much about anything, but i do know that im lonely, and every small encounter with people feels so good, that when its gone i suddenly know whats missing in my life. in my line of work i work alone at home, maintaining my old relationships for the lack of new ones. and it seems that other people my age do find happiness in social circles and make friends, human connection, and romantic partners. if all this seems like i try to justify the reasons for which i think are responsible for my loneliness, then it's true. so i ask you.. why should my solution be to mess with my internal programming to eliminate the need for company? isn't it possible that the simple answer is the right one? that i should enter more social circles? i sit home weeks, months, years, never go anywhere.. dreaming that someday the girl of my dreams will drop down on me from the sky.. how stupid is that? ------------------------------------------------------------------------------ No virus found in this incoming message. Checked by AVG - http://www.avg.com Version: 8.0.176 / Virus Database: 270.10.0/1864 - Release Date: 12/25/2008 9:40 AM Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted December 26, 2008 Report Share Posted December 26, 2008 > > Have you considered taking a job where you are in more contact with people? Perhaps in a large company so there are opportunities for different types of social contact. > ofcours i'v thought of that, it's just that im a musician, and this is where i feel the most powerful, i walking to a destination which means very much to me, and every other thing i try soon falls away cause it has nothing to do with me. soon i ask myself " what the hell am i doing here.. " . what other jobs could i do? costumer service? what about my business? should i give this up? > Vivian > stuff that bothers me > > > everyone always say how the best places to meet people are in social > circles. > and everyone also seem to agree that the need for company is natural > thing. > i dont know much about anything, but i do know that im lonely, and > every small encounter with people feels so good, that when its gone i > suddenly know whats missing in my life. > in my line of work i work alone at home, maintaining my old > relationships for the lack of new ones. > and it seems that other people my age do find happiness in social > circles and make friends, human connection, and romantic partners. > if all this seems like i try to justify the reasons for which i think > are responsible for my loneliness, then it's true. > so i ask you.. why should my solution be to mess with my internal > programming to eliminate the need for company? > isn't it possible that the simple answer is the right one? that i > should enter more social circles? > i sit home weeks, months, years, never go anywhere.. dreaming that > someday the girl of my dreams will drop down on me from the sky.. how > stupid is that? > > > > > > > ------------------------------------------------------------------------------ > > > > No virus found in this incoming message. > Checked by AVG - http://www.avg.com > Version: 8.0.176 / Virus Database: 270.10.0/1864 - Release Date: 12/25/2008 9:40 AM > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted December 26, 2008 Report Share Posted December 26, 2008 Facy, Thanks for reminding me that the sane thing to do is inquire - everything else is just temporary. Jon > > > > Have you considered taking a job where you are in more contact with > people? Perhaps in a large company so there are opportunities for > different types of social contact. > > > > > ofcours i'v thought of that, > it's just that im a musician, and this is where i feel the most > powerful, i walking to a destination which means very much to me, and > every other thing i try soon falls away cause it has nothing to do > with me. > soon i ask myself " what the hell am i doing here.. " . > what other jobs could i do? costumer service? > what about my business? should i give this up? > > > Vivian Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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