Re: Things I've Learned from my Mother

[Guest guest]

thank u Theresa for sharing this!!! I can hear Mother now!!!

Again thanks for the memories!!!

Billie

> Things I've Learned from My Mother

> Author Unknown

>

> My mother taught me TO APPRECIATE A JOB WELL DONE - " If you're going to

kill

> each other, do it outside - I just finished cleaning! "

>

>

>

> My mother taught me RELIGION - " You better pray that will come out of the

> carpet. "

>

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>

>

> My mother taught me IRONY - " Keep crying and I'll *give* you something to

> cry about. "

>

>

> My mother taught me about TIME TRAVEL: " If you don't straighten up, I'm

> going to knock you into the middle of next week! "

>

>

>

> My mother taught me FORESIGHT - " Make sure you wear clean underwear, in

case

> you're in an accident. "

>

>

>

> My mother taught me about CONTORTIONISM - " Will you *look* at the dirt on

> the back of your neck! "

>

>

> My mother taught me about WEATHER - " It looks as if a tornado swept

through

> your room. "

>

>

>

>

> My mother taught me about HYPOCRISY - " If I've told you once, I've told

you

> a million times - Don't Exaggerate!!! "

>

>

>

>

> My mother taught me about the science of OSMOSIS - " Shut your mouth and

eat

> your supper! "

>

>

> My mother taught me about STAMINA - " You'll sit there 'til all that

spinach

> is finished. "

>

>

>

>

> My mother taught me about BEHAVIOR MODIFICATION - " Stop acting like your

> father! "

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>

>

> My mother taught me THE CIRCLE OF LIFE - " I brought you into this world,

and

> I can take you out. "

>

>

> My mother taught me how to solve PHYSICS PROBLEMS - " If I yelled because I

> saw a meteor coming toward you; would you listen then? "

>

>

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>

> My mother taught me about ENVY - " There are millions of less fortunate

> children in this world who don't have wonderful parents like you do! "

>

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> My mother taught me LOGIC: " Because I said so, that's why. "

>

>

> To all the Wonderful Woman who belong to the MWA club (Miracle Workers

> Association) -

>

>

>

> Thanks for all the Wonderful Lessons Mom!

>