Re: Re: the work for couples

[Guest guest]

Hi Jude,

Thank you sharing this. I am planning to do this work with my partner. I know it

could be very hard to both facilitate and participate but I feel I must do this.

Much of my work I am doing in advance to be able to free myself up during the

process.

Thank you again,

Logan

________________________________

To: " Loving-what-is " <Loving-what-is >

Sent: Wednesday, May 9, 2012 6:54 PM

Subject: Re: the work for couples

 

Hi Logan,

I facilitate the work with couples using the 4 questions and the turn-arounds.

 It's important when working with a partner to be clear that the work is for

you, not for the other person. It's the truth found in inquiry that sets us

free. No other motives are allowed .

1. Fill out a worksheet.

2. Take turns reading the worksheets. Partner A reads in second person format,

such as " I'm angry at Dan because he doesn't pay attention to me. "  Then

Partner A makes eye contact with Partner B.  Partner B can then take these

statements inside himself and see where A is right.  In any case, B replies

only with a " Thank you. " B can notice any thoughts about justifying or defending

himself.  Then it's B's turn to read...

3.  Partner A facilitates B through the entire worksheet going through the

 turnarounds.  Use the sub questions of the worksheet found in LWI or

thework.com.  Partner A's job is to listen only.  Partner B then facilitates.

4.  Following this, you may discuss what self-realizations you had about

yourself that could lead to changing your behaviors towards your partner.  From

your heart, ask your partner for gentle reminders when you fall back into old

patterns (only if you really want to).  Notice when you step into your

partner's business without permission and move back to your own.  

This is a wonderful way to get intimate with yourself and your partner in ways

you could not imagine before.  Real freedom comes with joy when we are true to

what is.

Have fun with it.  Laugh, cry and share beliefs of a lifetime; expose the

truth.

jude powers