Todd should have called me

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1, no reality is he didn't

i can't know it would have been best for my path if he had, maybe i'm

being spared.

3, i feel really fucking angry and disrespected. I feel like i'm

letting him walk all over me.

i'm crying and pissed off at him

i bitch to my girlfriends about him.

i curse him in my mind, i'm unloving and cruel and want to be nasty

and spiteful and withhold my love for him.

i get an identity, i get to be the girl who always gets unavailable

boyfriends, i get to feel alive and believe there's a me here.

i'm scared i will get walked over and he will think he can just pick

me up and put me down when he feels like.

4, i would be feeling calm and peaceful on my own, i would be

understanding that maybe he doesn't feel like calling me and i

wouldn't make it mean anything about me.

I would still be loving myself and see i got time to do some work,

speak to some friends and enjoy an evening on my own.

T.A todd shouldn't have called me

1, becuase reality is he didn't

2, because i don't want him to call me if he doesn't want to.

3, because he could have called and been really off with me down the

phone and then i might have spent half the night in a head spin

T.A I should have called todd

1, i guess i could have called todd but i was scared he would feel

like i was being demanding ..

2, yes it was only what i made it mean about me that stopped me from

calling him

3, i was scared of him rejecting me and saying no and yet here i am in

this story that him not calling me is what this means anyway

T.A i should have called me

1, yes call me back to my business and out of his and what i amke this

mean about me

2, yes give myself what i want him to give me by calling me and

telling me how much i care rather than getting frustrated that i'm

still attached to this damn story

3, i should have asked me whether i wanted to hang out with him

tonight and the real answer was NO.

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