Re: car disability tag

[Guest guest]

I hide mine all of the time. Its embarrassing.

In a message dated 6/10/2009 9:42:33 A.M. Pacific Daylight Time,

mommyg9026@... writes:

Seems like a thing I have to constantly learn relearn or remind myself,

especially when I want to hide my car disability hang

tag.

Dawn

[Guest guest]

,

Why do you find it embarassing to have a handicapped tag? As it gets harder for

me to walk distances, I feel I deserve mine and am happy to have it. Before I

had braces, though, I was a little worried about people not thinking I was

handicapped.

[Guest guest]

,

I have had childhood CMT and trying to fit in has always been in issue with me.

I like to keep my medical problems private and using the tag lets everyone know

I have an issue. I never tell anyone I have CMT. I want them to see ME not my

CMT. Just the way that I am.

[Guest guest]

Hi, I feel the disease is bad as it is, so any benefits like handicap tags,

lower entrance fees etc. are welcome with me! If the society tries to make it

easier for people with disabilities - we should be happy! Let the others

struggle with long boring walks, and let's use those great nearby handicap

spots!

But it is about accepting the disease. If you do, than using the tag is no

problem. If you are not there yet - just wait! I was a bit embaressed too, but

now I am actually proud! It changes! So what am I proud about? I am different -

but for me it is in a positive way.

People  notice me (I like that) and remember me! I get the above mentioned

benefits + economic benefits + I work too, so it is really a great deal for me!

Why focus on the negative aspects? There are positive things too... (And yes,

the negatives list would probably be longer, but why bother with it?)

Beata

[Guest guest]

Who cares what people think? If they have a problem, ask them if they'd like to

trade places with you! K.

[Guest guest]

I too for many years pretended to be normal, but a year ago I had to resort to

using a cane because the falls were just coming too often.  I have decided to

embrace the " perks " that come with CMT instead of the " challenges " . 

I use my handicap tag, my cane and last summer I discovered when I went to the

Grand Canyon that I get in to all National Parks free!  The guy at the fee gate

saw my tag sitting on the consol and asked if someone was handicapped and he

gave me a card that is good to get in free to all National Parks and prefered

parking. where only employees would normally go.  I think the fee would have

been $25!  I have heard that you can also use this at Disneyland and go to the

head of the lines for the rides.  I am chosing not to suffer any longer and

accept what is being offered.  I am not asking for special treatment but if

there is an offer I will accept.

Even after years of saying no to the box boy at the grocery store offering to

take my groceries out for me I now say yes sometimes when I am feeling tired. 

Cyndi

[Guest guest]

:

No one really cares about about your tag. Most likely if people are watching

then they will appreciate knowing that a real person that has a disability is

using it to park there.

A good way to show people to show you and not your disability is by your

personality and your attitude. If you have a good personality and show a good

attitude people will let you know. You will feel more comfortable around people

then. It has worked for me tremendesly.

[Guest guest]

It is so wonderful that we live in a time when we have have legal protections

and privileges, like using a handicap parking spot.  I'm grateful that society

cares and has made these provisions for us.

 

As for privacy, I've never had anyone ask me 'why' I have the disability sign. 

That would be an invasion of privacy, but the vast majority of people are aware

of this and respectful.

 

I find parking in the handicap spot and getting my scooter out to be a great

experience.  In general, people are friendly and helpful.  Of course, people

do like to stare, especially kids.  So I just act very friendly and

smile, saying 'hi' to all the kids.  I get lots of smiles in return and

many comments, including many people wishing they had one themselves!

Occasionally, it even leads to full length conversations.  For example,

recently, a woman approached me and asked if she could ask me some questions. 

As it turns out, her husband just recently became disabled with MS and they

weren't sure what to do next.  I was able to answer her questions and jot down

some notes for her to get started.  She was tearfully grateful. 

 

When it comes to a physical handicap, it is what it is.  Accepting that is the

first step, but beyond that, reaching out to others can bring even greater

emotional contentment.  In addition, being comfortable with ourselves can teach

others to be comfortable in their skin, whatever shape it's in.

 

Having a disability uniquely qualifies us to better understand and relate to the

experiences of others who are going through difficult times.  With many

diseases, the symptoms are obvious.  With ours, it isn't always so.  Many of us

give the appearance of being 'normal', which creates opportunities for us to be

misunderstood, misjudged, misdiagnosed, or even dismissed entirely by others.

This type of human experience can make us even better equipped to empathize,

relate to, and help other people.

 

I, for one, am extremely grateful for the acknowledgement of my disability.  No

longer due I have to struggle in silence, feeling that there's something wrong

with me, like it's all in my head.  Now it has a name.  Now it all makes sense. 

Now I know I'm not crazy or a hypochondriac.  The label is wonderful.  It means

that it's not me.  It's the disease. 

 

The label makes it easier for people to understand that that I'm limited

physically, which means I no longer carry the stress of trying to explain why I

can't do something.  I feel no embarrassment or shame, since I didn't choose

this disease nor did I do it to myself.  It just happened.  Having a label and

being able to communicate my disability more easily to others and to also enjoy

legal protections is a huge gift for which I'm very grateful.

 

[Guest guest]

,

Thanks - I understand now.

________________________________

From: " MommyToJase@... " <MommyToJase@...>

Sent: Tuesday, June 16, 2009 2:50:27 AM

Subject: Re: car disability tag

,

I have had childhood CMT and trying to fit in has always been in issue with me.

I like to keep my medical problems private and using the tag lets everyone know

I have an issue. I never tell anyone I have CMT. I want them to see ME not my

CMT. Just the way that I am.

[Guest guest]

I have disabled license plates.

I live in a state which has has only the rear license plate. So, when I pull

into a handicap spot I just struggle out of the car and hobble off to the store,

using my cane or walker.

However, it's kinda funny to glance back and see some other handicap person ip

to the back of my car to get my license number so's they can turn me in! I

'sense' disappointment when they see the handicap plates - I musta ruined their

day!

Ah well, the exercise likely does them some good.

[Guest guest]

WOW, lots of discussion on this topic!

When I first got my hanging tag, back when I was 25, I was embarrased to hang

it. I would hide it in my car and never drive with it as I did not want people

to see me and pre-judge. Then, many years later when I was used to it, I finally

got the permanent tags and I guess part of me came to acceptance. A lot of what

I was feeling was my age and I WAS embarassed to need it at that time,

especially because I was dating and felt like someone my age should not need it.

I feel we all go in and out of stages of shock, denial and acceptance just like

in the grieving process and we all experience that at different times too. So

wherever you are in that stage, IT IS OK. It probably took me 15 years before I

was really in acceptance and each time I progress furthur, I tend to deny, get

angry and then accept again.

I too live in a state where you only have rear license plates and that is funny

because I see people ALL the time look at my back plate. Or, they say to me that

is for handicapped people and I don't see a tag hanging. I respond politely and

say, that is because I have a peramanet disability with permanent tags!

I do agree that if you are being dropped off or picked up, your driver should

not use the handicap spot. Many times my husband will drop me off, but then I am

walking back to the car on my own for whatever reason. Also, as far as people

with scooters parking in the handicapped spots, many times I know how much

battery I have left on my scooter and it may just be enough to get into store

and get my shopping done. If there is a spot several spots away, I will take

that spot and free up the handicap.

My point is, we all have our personal reasons for doing what we do and we have

to learn not to be so judgmental of each other.

Jackie

[Guest guest]

Hi Jackie,

 

Very well stated!  You illustrated well that our perceptions of the outside

world are many times colored by what we are feeling inside about ourself and

that does change over time.  So, it's wise not to judge others for what they

feel.  It is what it is!

 

I agree with you about the scooter/van situation too.  I too have barely made it

out of the store at times due to low battery.  Also, I appreciate the extra room

to make sure I'm safe while loading and unloading.  It also helps to get the

scooter close to the side doors, so there's less walking to get the stuff in

the van.

 

[Guest guest]

I always look forward to your posts as they are

Are always well informed and greatly states

Jackie

[Guest guest]

,

I understand perfectly about trying to fit in, since I also have had and been

aware of my CMT since childhood. I would have maimed myself if I thought it

would help me fit in. I grew up loathing my body and this disease that made me

" broken " . And I know that I am still not all the way " there " in regards to

self-acceptance, even though I have been an adult for many, many years.

I also used to not tell anybody about my CMT, but it got old trying to come up

with some other thing when some kids would say, " Eeeeewwwww! What's wrong with

your feet?!? "

In addition, I have spent my life watching my father and my sister deal with CMT

themselves, and often related to my father's progression as if it were my own.

I watched people's expressions as dad used his handicapped permit but was still

able to walk short distances without a cane. He didn't look like he needed a

permit and people often glared. As a result, I have become very defensive about

using my own tag as an adult.

I got my hang tag about 8 years ago. I probably wouldn't have gotten it that

far back if I didn't work for a large university. As is often the case on big

campuses, the parking there is atrocious and far away from the core of campus,

where I work, and the bus system not so reliable. I used to walk about 10

minutes each way between my car and office every day. The problem was that we

are in the Northeast and while they plow the sidewalks here, they cannot seem to

comprehend that once the sun comes out, it melts the snow a bit and that makes

the sidewalks wet, which turns to black ice once the sun sets.

In one calendar year I fell three times on the sidewalks there. I smashed the

same knee every time, and once almost passed out from the pain. I got so that I

was afraid to go to work because I was afraid to fall, and asked my MD for a

temporary permit to get through the winter. He asked me if this was related to

my CMT and I said yes, it is a balance thing. He wrote me a prescription for a

permanent handicap tag.

My coworker once actually told me that I was lucky to have that tag. I was

offended and told her that I would gladly give it back and walk the distance, if

that meant the disease would go away!

Aside from work, I may or may not use my tag, depending on how I am feeling

physically, what the footing is like, and how much walking I will be doing when

I get where I am going. Usually, I figure that I will park a little farther

away and leave the spots for someone else who might need them more than I do.

That is, unless there is ice. Then I take care of me first.

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[Guest guest]

Car disability tags are a hard issue to deal with. I first got mine at about age

35 because I was in Grad School and would only use it when I otherwise would

have a very long walk to class.

I renewed it for years after that and rarely used it, preferring to leave the

spots for more disabled people.

A few years back I started using it more often, and since many of us don't " look

disabled " , often endured glares from people who no doubt thought I was scamming.

Who cares what they think.

The past year or so it's obvious I need it, so people don't even notice.

When I see others in spots, I always look for a tag but if one is there, I try

not to judge if the person really needs the tag. Still, the other day I saw a

20ish woman park in a handicap spot and pretty much run across the drive to the

store. Had to wonder about that one.

I used to be able to get stickers with the handicapped symbol and " We couldn't

park here because you did " and would pit them on the side window of cars w/o

tags. Can't find them anymore.

BTW: You're not supposed to drive with the tag hanging from your mirror.

[Guest guest]

Something people don't realize is that alot of disabilities are not obvious. 

Years ago I had a friend with a severe heart problem that caused her to get so

tired that when we shopped she had to keep stopping and sit for awhile before we

could continue.   She looked fine on the outside, and walked normally. She

needed a disability tag because if she had to walk across a large parking lot

she would have to sit awhile before she could carry on.

Cyndi

[Guest guest]

Keep in mind when you see someone use a disability tag and run across a parking

lot that they may be there to pick up a disabled person. I care for my Dad who

is on oxygen and has heart problems and work with as a patient care attendant

for the elderly and there are times I have to run (well not really " run " due to

MY CMT but go as quickly as I can without falling down! LOL) into a facility to

pick up someone with a disability that cannot walk very far. I rarely use my tag

for my CMT but I have to use theirs for their disability.

Our perception of others situations always allows us to judge. Others may not

see our CMT, but we may not be seeing their situation either.

Las Vegas

From: no_reply

Date: Thu, 18 Jun 2009 14:18:07 +0000

Subject: Re: car disability tag

Car disability tags are a hard issue to deal with. I first got mine at about age

35 because I was in Grad School and would only use it when I otherwise would

have a very long walk to class.

I renewed it for years after that and rarely used it, preferring to leave the

spots for more disabled people.

A few years back I started using it more often, and since many of us don't " look

disabled " , often endured glares from people who no doubt thought I was scamming.

Who cares what they think.

The past year or so it's obvious I need it, so people don't even notice.

When I see others in spots, I always look for a tag but if one is there, I try

not to judge if the person really needs the tag. Still, the other day I saw a

20ish woman park in a handicap spot and pretty much run across the drive to the

store. Had to wonder about that one.

I used to be able to get stickers with the handicapped symbol and " We couldn't

park here because you did " and would pit them on the side window of cars w/o

tags. Can't find them anymore.

BTW: You're not supposed to drive with the tag hanging from your mirror.

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[Guest guest]

Hi ,

This is exactly what I do. I have a feeling those of us that have had CMT as

children are more cautious due to childhood experiences.

In a message dated 6/18/2009 9:26:29 A.M. Pacific Daylight Time,

lalbrecht02@... writes:

Aside from work, I may or may not use my tag, depending on how I am

feeling physically, what the footing is like, and how much walking I will be

doing when I get where I am going. Usually, I figure that I will park a little

farther away and leave the spots for someone else who might need them more

than I do. That is, unless there is ice. Then I take care of me first.

[Guest guest]

In my city, citizens can give tickets when people w/out permits park in the

spaces. The ticket is something like 300 bucks. I am going to a class next week

to be able to do this myself.

[Guest guest]

Hey! I just couldn't let this issue go by without putting in my two cents. I got

a placard about two years ago, and It has made all the difference in the world.

My husband does all the driving and the heavy lifting. I appreciate the fact

that we can park near the entrance of most establishments and I can walk up the

door. We are going to take our eight-year-old to Six Flags in about two weeks. I

called to find out about disabled parking and am definitely going to use it.

Nina in Stockton, CA