Fw: Twenty Nine Lines To Make You Smile

[Guest guest]

Enjoy your day hope this made it better!

Shirley Stermen-Swaim

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Sent: Wednesday, November 26, 2008 10:23 AM

Subject: Fw: Twenty Nine Lines To Make You Smile

Subject: Fw: Twenty Nine Lines To Make You Smile

To: jentroxel@..., brittroxel@..., bbenear@...

Date: Tuesday, November 25, 2008, 2:25 PM

TWENTY NINE LINES TO MAKE YOU SMILE

1.. My husband and I divorced over religious differences. He thought he

was God and I didn't.

2.. I don't suffer from insanity; I enjoy every minute of it.

3.. Some people are alive only because it's illegal to kill them.

4.. I used to have a handle on life, but it broke.

5.. Don't take life too seriously; No on e gets out alive.

6.. You're just jealous because the voices only talk to me

7.. Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder.

8.. Earth is the insane asylum for the universe.

9.. I'm not a complete idiot -- Some parts are just missing.

10... Out of my mind. Back in five minutes.

11.. NyQuil, the stuffy, sneezy, why-the-heck-is-the-room-spinning

medicine.

12.. God must love stupid people; He made so many.

13.. The gene pool could use a little chlorine.

14.. Consciousness: That annoying time between naps.

15.. Ever stop to think, and forget to start again?

16.. Being 'over the hill' is much better than being under it!

17.. Wrinkled Was Not One of the Things I Wanted to Be When I Grew up.

18 Procrastinate Now!

19. I Have a Degree in Liberal Arts; Do You Want Fries With That? < B>

20.. A hangover is the wrath of grapes.

21.. A journey of a thousand miles begins with a cash advance.

22.. Stupidity is not a handicap. Park elsewhere!

23..They call it PMS because Mad Cow Disease was already taken.

24.. He who dies with the most toys is nonetheless DEAD.

25.. A picture is worth a thousand words, but it uses up three

thousand times the memory.

26.. Ham and eggs...A day's work for a chicken, a lifetime commitment

for a pig.

27.. The trouble with life is there's no background music.

28.. The original point and click interface was a & Wesson.

29.. I smile because I don't know what the hell is going on.

Appreciate every single thing you have, especially your friends!

Life is too short and friends are too few!

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[Guest guest]

Shirley,

Thanks for sending this.

It does make you smile--love #1.

Diane

Fw: Twenty Nine Lines To Make You Smile

To: jentroxel@..., brittroxel@..., bbenear@...

Date: Tuesday, November 25, 2008, 2:25 PM

TWENTY NINE LINES TO MAKE YOU SMILE

1.. My husband and I divorced over religious differences. He thought

he was God and I didn't.

2.. I don't suffer from insanity; I enjoy every minute of it.

3.. Some people are alive only because it's illegal to kill them.

4.. I used to have a handle on life, but it broke.

5.. Don't take life too seriously; No on e gets out alive.

6.. You're just jealous because the voices only talk to me

7.. Beauty is in the eye of the beer holder.

8.. Earth is the insane asylum for the universe.

9.. I'm not a complete idiot -- Some parts are just missing.

10... Out of my mind. Back in five minutes.

11.. NyQuil, the stuffy, sneezy, why-the-heck-is-the-room-spinning

medicine.

12.. God must love stupid people; He made so many.

13.. The gene pool could use a little chlorine.

14.. Consciousness: That annoying time between naps.

15.. Ever stop to think, and forget to start again?

16.. Being 'over the hill' is much better than being under it!

17.. Wrinkled Was Not One of the Things I Wanted to Be When I Grew

up.

18 Procrastinate Now!

19. I Have a Degree in Liberal Arts; Do You Want Fries With That? <

B>

20.. A hangover is the wrath of grapes.

21.. A journey of a thousand miles begins with a cash advance.

22.. Stupidity is not a handicap. Park elsewhere!

23..They call it PMS because Mad Cow Disease was already taken.

24.. He who dies with the most toys is nonetheless DEAD.

25.. A picture is worth a thousand words, but it uses up three

thousand times the memory.

26.. Ham and eggs...A day's work for a chicken, a lifetime commitment

for a pig.

27.. The trouble with life is there's no background music.

28.. The original point and click interface was a & Wesson.

29.. I smile because I don't know what the hell is going on.

Appreciate every single thing you have, especially your friends!

Life is too short and friends are too few!

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---------------

This message (including attachments) may contain information that is

privileged, confidential or protected from disclosure. If you are not

the intended recipient, you are hereby notified that dissemination,

disclosure, copying, distribution or use of this message or any

information contained in it is strictly prohibited. If you have

received this message in error, please immediately notify the sender

by reply e-mail and delete this message from your computer. Although

we have taken steps to ensure that this e-mail and attachments are

free from any virus, we advise that in keeping with good computing

practice the recipient should ensure they are actually virus free.

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