Re: Sharing beds and AS.......

[Guest guest]

If I were married, etc. I would not want my own room to sleep in and

such. I may as well as just be a roomate, if that is the case.

>

>

>

> Hi,

>

> There used to be an only AS list I belonged some time ago.

>

> In that list, there was a topic that was mentioned periodically.

>

> It was the use of a room, bed, between the spouses.

>

> Most of the guys in the list wanted to have the house divided in

which they

> could live their lives and share specific common space with their

spouses or

> mates, or partners.......

> Some of the girls agreed, and others did not necessarily liked

it.

>

> Yet all of them wanted their individual usage of specific spaces.

>

> My experience was that when I was growing up, my father and mother

shared

> the bedroom, but had both different beds. My dad liked to sleep

alone, no one

> touching his space or him. They had two beds, and they shared

them or we

> would have not been here!

> Yet dad had his very own bed as well.......

>

> Office space.......

> No one was to go into his office, except mother and his kids; but

mostly he

> was there.

>

> When we got into his office, we knew what we could touch and what

we could

> not touch.

> My dad was a cool serious guy, but he liked his space as well.

>

> Dad had some back troubles so he also liked his bed as he designed

it and

> had it made his way. Trust me, it was not a fun bed, but the other

one they

> had was.

>

> We played in their room and hang around, specially if he was

telling us how

> we were supposed to behave and live life.......

>

> When I got sick, he would always put me in his bed. He knew I

felt better

> by just being there and felt safe. Others went to their beds or

their other

> bed.

>

> Dad liked order i his life and surroundings and so do I. I like

certain

> things in certain places and that keeps harmony in my space and

life.

>

> I rarely loose things, but when I have it is because I am trying a

new space

> and have gone to look at the old place. It is then that I recall

having

> change a setting and go to my new settings.

>

> I think that dad was NOT being possessive or territorial. He was

being

> organized and concern with his effectiveness if things were not in

order and

> where they were supposed to be.

> It had to do with organization, and controlling his environment to

be

> effective more than anything else!

>

> NT's are also like this, they like certain things in certain

places, it is

> called organization. They (NT's) just have it in a smaller degree

than many

> of us in the spectrum.

>

> I would prefer to sleep in the same bedroom of my spouse or

partner, and the

> same bed; but it will not bother me if I also slept by myself.

> I do like coziness, cuddling, naughtiness and the whole package,

but I can

> also do both.

> I have to see what my partner or spouse would like to have, and

take it from

> there.

>

> Many times I have heard that people in the spectrum prefer duplex

do to this

> matter.

> Some AS people whom end up with other AS find this arrangement

fine, others

> might find it cold. Yet there is coldness if you both still share

romance,

> naughtiness, affection, love, meals and the whole thing together.

>

> That is what I have heard at least in that only AS list long ago.

> I wonder how some AS people here would think of having their own

space. The

> people i this list seems to be far more lenient than the AS of the

other

> list.

>

> I adapt easily, and as long as I have free reach of my partner, I

do not

> necessarily car of the space he might want to have for him.

> I, on my own house only use my bedroom, the bathroom, the kitchen.

I love

> my garden, so I stay out there quite a bit. I do not use any

other part of

> the house, except for the laundry room and the carport for

Pietro. Pietro the

> nickname of my car.

>

> .

>

>

>

>

>

>

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