NT Spousal Support

[Guest guest]

Hello NT's & Aspies,

I am new to the group, but not the life style. My husband of 22 years

is an Aspie. His father , brother and sister are Aspies too. We only

recently discovered what the condition was called and that we are not

alone.

For me the most difficult part of being an Aspie spouse is the the

lack of any empathy from my friends and family regarding the demands

of having an AS marriage. Years of counseling offered no relief and

until I started working with educators I had never heard of AS. The

psychotherapists in this country seem to ignore or are not aware of AS

as a possibility with their patients. Of course none of us understood

where the behavior was coming from. There have been a lot of blowups

over the years with out any resolution.

My husband was put on Prozac for a while and the difference was

astounding. He was like prince charming. He shone socially and for the

first time I genuinely enjoyed our relationship without any tension or

reservations. My husband has a very technical job however and after

being on Prozac for about 20 months he stopped taking it. He said it

made his brain feel like mush and he couldn't think right. My

philosophy on taking drugs is don't anyway, so I'm sure health wise it

is for the best in the long run.

What I can't seem to find is some sort of local support group. I could

really use some feedback from others who cope with this life.

My husband insists that he can not make any changes. I can't believe

this is true. We all have our quirks and idiosyncrasies, but as adults

we should know ourselves and develop strategies for interacting with

others. I really feel it is the individual's responsibility. I feel my

husband is being lazy because the social interaction doesn't come

easy. He has cussed out little children and blown up at new

acquaintances and clerks. I feel this behavior is unacceptable and he

should take responsibility for developing methods of control. He

claims he can't. I would like to hear from others with AS to find out

if it is a case of can't or won't.

Thanks for your time and any insight you can offer.

K D