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Re: Family stuff - Bill

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Hi again Bill,Sounds like these factors are all out of your control - they either pre-date you or have nothing to do with you.We have a similar isolation from my husband's family.Sadly, sometimes the best thing that we can do is to protect ourselves and our families against the rest.Warmly,Daneka No, the barriers are three-fold:

Cultural isolation - many of my relatives are *still* more Old World

than New. Think "traditional" Mennonite, or Amish, though strictly

speaking they're not of either faith. Strangers and "their ways" aren't

very welcome.

Religious belief - my extended family mostly still are River

Brethren, with a strong fundamentalist insistence that "'God's Will' be

done..." Autism often is viewed as punishment for (??); even by some in

much younger generations.

The family quarrel - still alive and very well. Even my *one* close

family contact (cousin, my age) now won't talk about it any more. Out

of fear he'll draw the wrath of others, closer to him than me. And

*I've* felt that wrath! Amazing, after c.65 years; generations! "The

sins of the (mother) shall be visited on the sons..." ???

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Daneka Wheeler wrote:

> Hi again Bill,

> Sounds like these factors are all out of your control - they either

> pre-date you or have nothing to do with you.

True.

*Except* that apart from re-connecting, or making new connections

with " family " , I'm still trying to locate my same-age autistic cousin

(in an institution since she was 14-or-so).

Talk about circling the wagons: That woman's whereabouts are more

closely guarded than Fort Knox. " Hmm. Just *why*, Bill, do you want to

know where she is...?! "

But you're right about pre-dating me. My Mother's quarrel with

*everyone* certainly has, uh, ...generalized. :(

> We have a similar isolation from my husband's family.

> Sadly, sometimes the best thing that we can do is to protect ourselves

> and our families against the rest.

My deepest sympathy. I think you're right. Sometimes self-protection

is the only thing left.

> Warmly,

> Daneka

Thanks Daneka. *From the heart*!

> No, the barriers are three-fold:

> Cultural isolation - many of my relatives are *still* more Old World

> than New. Think " traditional " Mennonite, or Amish, though strictly

> speaking they're not of either faith. Strangers and " their ways " aren't

> very welcome.

[ snip ]

> Religious belief

[ snip ]

> The family quarrel - still alive and very well.

[ snip ]

- Bill, 76, AS

--

WD " Bill " Loughman - Berkeley, California USA

http://home.earthlink.net/~wdloughman/wdl.htm

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Welcome back Bill! It's good to have you back in (Our) family. You were missed.

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