what do you do???

[Guest guest]

Hi fellow parents

I just wondered if anyone has any great words of wisdom when this

happens...

Yesterday, Aidan's community support worker took him out for the

evening. They had dinner at 's, went to the library, walked

around the mall and went for ice cream. I could tell something was

on 's mind when she brought Aidan home. Then she told me.

While they were at 's having their dinner, Aidan was,

well...being Aidan - " swimming with his arms " , rocking back and

forth and so on - no big deal, just who he is and what he does!

Anyhow, a couple of tables away was a group of 4 young teenage

girls - probably close to Aidan's age of 13 1/2. One of them

noticed Aidan and, giggling, ponted him out to her friends who all

proceeded to look at Aidan and laugh. The good news is that Aidan

was completely oblivious to this and if he did notice them laughing

would have thought they were trying to be his friends.

was horrified - this has not happened before and I don't even recall

this happening to me this blatantly.

told me she just glared at them and when one noticed, they

all kinda stopped but would lean together and loudly whisper - " Is

she still looking at us? " Steph said that it was so obvious (the

girls' bad behaviour) that other patrons in the restaurant were

obviously dismayed and uncomfortable but no one said anything to

them.

What would you have done?

We went to an amusement park this summer with the boys and my sister

and her family. Someone stared at Aidan (I'm pretty much used to

it - particularly when he is in his special stroller and brngs both

feet upside down to his face without using his hands - yup - it

looks downright weird! So my sister, bless her being so forthright

says " Hey, what's the matter? Is he wearing something of yours? "

Too funny...but on the other hand, the message was delivered!

But I really want to know - has anyone any experience with this and

if so how did you handle it?

So, I'm looking for a good " one-liner " or something positive and

educational to say to someone should this happen again - I still

cannot believe it because I thought nearly everybody in our city

knew Aidan.

thanks a bunch

/diane

st. thomas ontario

[Guest guest]

Hi Diane,

I run into this every time we go out. I just look at them and say, " Is there a

question you would like to ask? " That usually lets them know they have been

caught being rude and gives them an opening to ask a question if they want. I

don't get a lot of question. BarbCheck out my

siteswww.myladysvictoriancrochet.comwww.nightwispers.com

To: @...: diane_white@...: Sat, 20 Sep 2008

23:18:33 +0000Subject: what do you do???

Hi fellow parentsI just wondered if anyone has any great words of wisdom when

this happens...Yesterday, Aidan's community support worker took him out for the

evening. They had dinner at 's, went to the library, walked around the mall

and went for ice cream. I could tell something was on 's mind when she

brought Aidan home. Then she told me. While they were at 's having their

dinner, Aidan was, well...being Aidan - " swimming with his arms " , rocking back

and forth and so on - no big deal, just who he is and what he does! Anyhow, a

couple of tables away was a group of 4 young teenage girls - probably close to

Aidan's age of 13 1/2. One of them noticed Aidan and, giggling, ponted him out

to her friends who all proceeded to look at Aidan and laugh. The good news is

that Aidan was completely oblivious to this and if he did notice them laughing

would have thought they were trying to be his friends. was horrified -

this has not happened before and I don't even recall this happening to me this

blatantly. told me she just glared at them and when one noticed, they

all kinda stopped but would lean together and loudly whisper - " Is she still

looking at us? " Steph said that it was so obvious (the girls' bad behaviour)

that other patrons in the restaurant were obviously dismayed and uncomfortable

but no one said anything to them. What would you have done?We went to an

amusement park this summer with the boys and my sister and her family. Someone

stared at Aidan (I'm pretty much used to it - particularly when he is in his

special stroller and brngs both feet upside down to his face without using his

hands - yup - it looks downright weird! So my sister, bless her being so

forthright says " Hey, what's the matter? Is he wearing something of yours? " Too

funny...but on the other hand, the message was delivered!But I really want to

know - has anyone any experience with this and if so how did you handle it?So,

I'm looking for a good " one-liner " or something positive and educational to say

to someone should this happen again - I still cannot believe it because I

thought nearly everybody in our city knew Aidan.thanks a bunch/dianest. thomas

ontario

[Guest guest]

I remember someone saying that they used the line " I know, he is just gorgeaous,

you just can't take your eyes off him, can you? "

Holly

[Guest guest]

Oh Diane

I am so sorry to hear this happened. I have such a hard time hearing things

like this as I can't believe there are still ignorant people out there. We have

not had this happen to us (yet) and I don't know how I will respond when it does

happen. I like the suggestion of asking the person if they would like to ask a

question.

I still remember our social worker at the hospital were Amy was born telling

us that we will have many hurtful things said/done to us and to remember that

those people are just ignorant and we need to educate them to the best of our

ability.

Ali

dianedublu wrote:

Hi fellow parents

I just wondered if anyone has any great words of wisdom when this

happens...

Yesterday, Aidan's community support worker took him out for the

evening. They had dinner at 's, went to the library, walked

around the mall and went for ice cream. I could tell something was

on 's mind when she brought Aidan home. Then she told me.

While they were at 's having their dinner, Aidan was,

well...being Aidan - " swimming with his arms " , rocking back and

forth and so on - no big deal, just who he is and what he does!

Anyhow, a couple of tables away was a group of 4 young teenage

girls - probably close to Aidan's age of 13 1/2. One of them

noticed Aidan and, giggling, ponted him out to her friends who all

proceeded to look at Aidan and laugh. The good news is that Aidan

was completely oblivious to this and if he did notice them laughing

would have thought they were trying to be his friends.

was horrified - this has not happened before and I don't even recall

this happening to me this blatantly.

told me she just glared at them and when one noticed, they

all kinda stopped but would lean together and loudly whisper - " Is

she still looking at us? " Steph said that it was so obvious (the

girls' bad behaviour) that other patrons in the restaurant were

obviously dismayed and uncomfortable but no one said anything to

them.

What would you have done?

We went to an amusement park this summer with the boys and my sister

and her family. Someone stared at Aidan (I'm pretty much used to

it - particularly when he is in his special stroller and brngs both

feet upside down to his face without using his hands - yup - it

looks downright weird! So my sister, bless her being so forthright

says " Hey, what's the matter? Is he wearing something of yours? "

Too funny...but on the other hand, the message was delivered!

But I really want to know - has anyone any experience with this and

if so how did you handle it?

So, I'm looking for a good " one-liner " or something positive and

educational to say to someone should this happen again - I still

cannot believe it because I thought nearly everybody in our city

knew Aidan.

thanks a bunch

/diane

st. thomas ontario

---------------------------------

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the Web BETA

[Guest guest]

I sent for those cards we spoke about a few weeks ago . " Words are like a

FISTS! " I am starting to hand them out when I See gaggles of geese (teens

mostly) who look like they could use a " WORD " . I also took a bunch to the

local h/s for passing out by teachers, counselors, etc.

We can all campaign as hard as we did for 'that movie " .

On Mon, Sep 22, 2008 at 11:20 AM, Van Straaten <

ali_van_straaten@...> wrote:

> Oh Diane

>

> I am so sorry to hear this happened. I have such a hard time hearing things

> like this as I can't believe there are still ignorant people out there. We

> have not had this happen to us (yet) and I don't know how I will respond

> when it does happen. I like the suggestion of asking the person if they

> would like to ask a question.

>

> I still remember our social worker at the hospital were Amy was born

> telling us that we will have many hurtful things said/done to us and to

> remember that those people are just ignorant and we need to educate them to

> the best of our ability.

>

> Ali

>

> dianedublu <diane_white@... <diane_white%40rogers.com>> wrote:

> Hi fellow parents

> I just wondered if anyone has any great words of wisdom when this

> happens...

> Yesterday, Aidan's community support worker took him out for the

> evening. They had dinner at 's, went to the library, walked

> around the mall and went for ice cream. I could tell something was

> on 's mind when she brought Aidan home. Then she told me.

> While they were at 's having their dinner, Aidan was,

> well...being Aidan - " swimming with his arms " , rocking back and

> forth and so on - no big deal, just who he is and what he does!

> Anyhow, a couple of tables away was a group of 4 young teenage

> girls - probably close to Aidan's age of 13 1/2. One of them

> noticed Aidan and, giggling, ponted him out to her friends who all

> proceeded to look at Aidan and laugh. The good news is that Aidan

> was completely oblivious to this and if he did notice them laughing

> would have thought they were trying to be his friends.

> was horrified - this has not happened before and I don't even recall

> this happening to me this blatantly.

> told me she just glared at them and when one noticed, they

> all kinda stopped but would lean together and loudly whisper - " Is

> she still looking at us? " Steph said that it was so obvious (the

> girls' bad behaviour) that other patrons in the restaurant were

> obviously dismayed and uncomfortable but no one said anything to

> them.

> What would you have done?

> We went to an amusement park this summer with the boys and my sister

> and her family. Someone stared at Aidan (I'm pretty much used to

> it - particularly when he is in his special stroller and brngs both

> feet upside down to his face without using his hands - yup - it

> looks downright weird! So my sister, bless her being so forthright

> says " Hey, what's the matter? Is he wearing something of yours? "

> Too funny...but on the other hand, the message was delivered!

> But I really want to know - has anyone any experience with this and

> if so how did you handle it?

> So, I'm looking for a good " one-liner " or something positive and

> educational to say to someone should this happen again - I still

> cannot believe it because I thought nearly everybody in our city

> knew Aidan.

> thanks a bunch

> /diane

> st. thomas ontario

>

> ---------------------------------

> Instant message from any web browser! Try the new Yahoo! Canada Messenger

> for the Web BETA

>

>

[Guest guest]

Here's our " one-liner " ...

" Are you staring because Aubrey is so beautiful, or because

YOU are so clueless? "

We call people that stare " CLUELESS " ...

If I was in that situation, as a teacher for 32 years, I would have walked up to

that table and very " teacherly-like " would have given those girls a very firm

educational talk on how inappropriate their behavior was.

I had an aide come back to my house once, plop on my couch and scream-

" How can you stand it?! " " I spent just a half-hour in the mall with Aubrey and I

wanted to SCREAM at most of the people for staring at her? " Some aides have

gotten so frustrated, they HAVE stood up for Aubrey in malls...

Anyway, after TEN years of this, I have waaaaaaaaaaaaaayyyyy less

patience for this now. I REFUSE to stay at home and hide because OTHER people

are so clueless...

Sometimes I just tell people straight-

I look the parent right in the eye and say---

" Plllllllllease, don't stare at my child. It hurts my feelings and those of her

sister as well. Teach your child not to do the same. Thank you very much! " Most

of the time, no matter how angry I am, I walk away with blurry vision...

Sadly...I would feel very sorry for that person if they had the guts to call me

on what I say to them, because I have so much pent-up frustration with idiots

that do this, that I don't think they would want me to really release what I

have been holding back for years to THEM!

Sometimes, Aubrey will just blow my mind and walk up to the clueless and hug

them. And she is taught NOT to hug strangers...she is supposed to shake a hand

after she is introduced...

Lucky for the world that I usually have a LOT of patience for the " clueless "

because they have not been gifted with a child that has taught me so much about

what is important in this world.

I simply am not having a " patient with the clueles day " -today.

Desi

Hi fellow parents

I just wondered if anyone has any great words of wisdom when this

happens...

Yesterday, Aidan's community support worker took him out for the

evening. They had dinner at 's, went to the library, walked

around the mall and went for ice cream. I could tell something was

on 's mind when she brought Aidan home. Then she told me.

While they were at 's having their dinner, Aidan was,

well...being Aidan - " swimming with his arms " , rocking back and

forth and so on - no big deal, just who he is and what he does!

Anyhow, a couple of tables away was a group of 4 young teenage

girls - probably close to Aidan's age of 13 1/2. One of them

noticed Aidan and, giggling, ponted him out to her friends who all

proceeded to look at Aidan and laugh. The good news is that Aidan

was completely oblivious to this and if he did notice them laughing

would have thought they were trying to be his friends.

was horrified - this has not happened before and I don't even recall

this happening to me this blatantly.

told me she just glared at them and when one noticed, they

all kinda stopped but would lean together and loudly whisper - " Is

she still looking at us? " Steph said that it was so obvious (the

girls' bad behaviour) that other patrons in the restaurant were

obviously dismayed and uncomfortable but no one said anything to

them.

What would you have done?

We went to an amusement park this summer with the boys and my sister

and her family. Someone stared at Aidan (I'm pretty much used to

it - particularly when he is in his special stroller and brngs both

feet upside down to his face without using his hands - yup - it

looks downright weird! So my sister, bless her being so forthright

says " Hey, what's the matter? Is he wearing something of yours? "

Too funny...but on the other hand, the message was delivered!

But I really want to know - has anyone any experience with this and

if so how did you handle it?

So, I'm looking for a good " one-liner " or something positive and

educational to say to someone should this happen again - I still

cannot believe it because I thought nearly everybody in our city

knew Aidan.

thanks a bunch

/diane

st. thomas ontario

------------ --------- --------- ---

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