Guest guest Posted December 19, 2006 Report Share Posted December 19, 2006 Lovely to hear from you - All the Best to you and your family for a Happy, Peaceful Christmas. Elainexx >-- Original Message -- >To: SydBand > >Date: Tue, 19 Dec 2006 22:20:27 -0000 >Subject: Merry Christmas >Reply-To: SydBand > > >Hi Everyone, > >I havent posted for months, have been very busy with family and work. >I check in on the site to keep up with the bandster activities and >Helen keeps me informed as well. I wanted to say have a safe and happy >xmas to all and hope to catch up with everyone in the new year. > >Take care > from the gong > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted December 14, 2008 Report Share Posted December 14, 2008 This story will make me laugh all next year. Thank you for sharing. I would have loved to have been a fly on the wall that day. Hugs, VickieGTo: HepatitisCSupportGroupForDummies Sent: Sunday, December 14, 2008 10:54:25 AMSubject: MERRY CHRISTMAS May you laugh all next year love don in kansasAs a joke, my brother Jay used to hang a pair of panty hose over his fireplace before Christmas. He said all he wanted was for Santa to fill them. What they say about Santa checking the list twice must be true because every Christmas morning, although Jay's kids' stockings overflowed, his poor pantyhose hung sadly empty. One year I decided to make his dream come true. I put on sunglasses and went in search of an inflatable love doll. They don't sell those things at Wal-Mart. I had to go to an adult bookstore downtown. If you've never been in an X-rated store, don't go. You'll only confuse yourself. I was there an hour saying things like, 'What does this do?' 'You're kidding me!' 'Who would buy that?' Finally, I made it to the inflatable doll section. I wanted to buy a standard, uncomplicated doll that could also substitute as a passenger in my truck so I could use the car pool lane during rush hour. Finding what I wanted was difficult. 'Love Dolls' come in many different models. The top of the line, according to the side of the box, could do things I'd only seen in a book on animal husbandry. I settled for 'Lovable Louise.' She was at the bottom of the price scale. To call Louise a 'doll' took a huge leap of imagination, but on Christmas Eve and with the help of an old bicycle pump, Louise came to life. My sister-in-law was in on the plan and let me in during the wee morning hours. Long after Santa had come and gone, I filled the dangling pantyhose with Louise's pliant (you might want to look this up) legs and bottom. I also ate some cookies and drank what remained of a glass of milk on a nearby tray I went home, and giggled for a couple of hours. The next morning my brother called to say that Santa had been to his house and left a present that had made him VERY happy, but had left the dog confused. She would bark, start to walk away, then come back and bark some more. We all agreed that Louise should remain in her pantyhose so the rest of the family could admire her when they came over for the traditional Christmas dinner. My grandmother noticed Louise the moment she walked in the door. 'What the hell is that?' she asked. My brother quickly explained, 'It's a doll.' 'Who would play with something like that?' Granny snapped. I kept my mouth shut. 'Where are her clothes?' Granny continued. 'Boy, that turkey sure smells nice, Gran,' Jay said, to steer her into the dining room. But Granny was relentless. 'Why doesn't she have any teeth?' Again, I could have answered, but why would I? It was Christmas and no one wanted to ride in the back of the ambulance saying, 'Hang on Granny, hang on!' My grandfather, a delightful old man with poor eyesight, sidled up to me and said, ' Hey, who's the naked gal by the fireplace?' I told him she was Jay's friend. A few minutes later I noticed Grandpa by the mantel, talking to Louise. Not just talking, but actually flirting. It was then that we realized this might be Grandpa's last Christmas at home. The dinner went well. We made the usual small talk about who had died, who was dying, and who should be killed, when suddenly Louise made a noise like my father in the bathroom in the morning. Then she lurched from the mantel, flew around the room twice, and fell in a heap in front of the sofa. The cat screamed. I passed cranberry sauce through my nose, and Grandpa ran across the room, fell to his knees, and began administering mouth-to-mouth resuscitation. My brother fell back over his chair and wet his pants. Granny threw down her napkin, stomped out of the room, and went to sit in the car. It was indeed a Christmas to treasure and remember. Later in my brother's garage, we conducted a thorough examination to decide the cause of Louise's collapse. We discovered that Louise had suffered from a hot ember to the back of her right thigh. Fortunately, thanks to a wonder drug called duct tape, we restored her to perfect health. I can't wait until next Christmas. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted December 14, 2008 Report Share Posted December 14, 2008 --- THAT WAS A GOOD ONE! Truely had me rolling!!!In HepatitisCSupportGroupForDummies , Christ wrote: > > May you laugh all next year > love > don in kansas > > As a joke, my brother Jay used to hang a pair of panty hose over his > fireplace before Christmas. He said all he wanted was for Santa to fill > them. > > What they say about Santa checking the list twice must be true > because every Christmas morning, although Jay's kids' stockings overflowed, his > poor pantyhose hung sadly empty. > > One year I decided to make his dream come true. I put on sunglasses > and went in search of an inflatable love doll. They don't sell those > things at Wal-Mart. I had to go to an adult bookstore downtown. > > If you've never been in an X-rated store, don't go. You'll only > confuse yourself. I was there an hour saying things like, 'What does this do?' > 'You're kidding me!' 'Who would buy that?' Finally, I made it to the inflatable doll section. > > I wanted to buy a standard, uncomplicated doll that could also > substitute as a passenger in my truck so I could use the car pool lane during > rush hour. > > Finding what I wanted was difficult. 'Love Dolls' come in many different models. > The top of the line, according to the side of the box, > could do things I'd only seen in a book on animal husbandry. I > settled for 'Lovable Louise.' She was at the bottom of the price scale. > > To call Louise a 'doll' took a huge leap of imagination, but on Christmas Eve > and with the help of an old bicycle pump, Louise came to life. > > My sister-in-law was in on the plan and let me in during the wee > morning hours. Long after Santa had come and gone, I filled the dangling > pantyhose with Louise's pliant (you might want to look this up) legs and bottom. > I also ate some cookies and drank what remained of a glass of milk on a nearby > tray I went home, and giggled for a couple of hours. > > The next morning my brother called to say that Santa had been to his > house and left a present that had made him VERY happy, but had left the > dog confused. She would bark, start to walk away, then come back and bark > some more. > > We all agreed that Louise should remain in her pantyhose so the rest > of the family could admire her when they came over for the traditional > Christmas dinner. > > My grandmother noticed Louise the moment she walked in the door. > 'What the hell is that?' she asked. > > My brother quickly explained, 'It's a doll.' > > 'Who would play with something like that?' Granny snapped. > > I kept my mouth shut. > > 'Where are her clothes?' Granny continued. > > 'Boy, that turkey sure smells nice, Gran,' Jay said, to steer her > into the dining room. > > But Granny was relentless. 'Why doesn't she have any teeth?' > > Again, I could have answered, but why would I? It was Christmas and > no one wanted to ride in the back of the ambulance saying, > 'Hang on Granny, hang on!' > > My grandfather, a delightful old man with poor eyesight, sidled up to me > and said, ' Hey, who's the naked gal by the fireplace?' I told him she was > Jay's friend. > > A few minutes later I noticed Grandpa by the mantel, talking to Louise. > Not just talking, but actually flirting. It was then that we realized > this might be Grandpa's last Christmas at home. > > The dinner went well. We made the usual small talk about who had died, who > was dying, and who should be killed, when suddenly Louise made a > noise like my father in the bathroom in the morning. Then she lurched > from the mantel, flew around the room twice, and fell in a heap in front of > the sofa. The cat screamed. I passed cranberry sauce through my nose, and > Grandpa ran across the room, fell to his knees, and began administering > mouth-to-mouth resuscitation. > > My brother fell back over his chair and wet his pants. > > Granny threw down her napkin, stomped out of the room, > and went to sit in the car. > It was indeed a Christmas to treasure and remember. > > Later in my brother's garage, we conducted a thorough examination to > decide the cause of Louise's collapse. We discovered that Louise had > suffered from a hot ember to the back of her right thigh. > > Fortunately, thanks to a wonder drug called duct tape, we restored her to > perfect health. > > I can't wait until next Christmas. > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted December 15, 2008 Report Share Posted December 15, 2008 To you too. Subject: MERRY CHRISTMASTo: HepatitisCSupportGroupForDummies Date: Sunday, December 14, 2008, 8:54 AM May you laugh all next year love don in kansasAs a joke, my brother Jay used to hang a pair of panty hose over his fireplace before Christmas. He said all he wanted was for Santa to fill them. What they say about Santa checking the list twice must be true because every Christmas morning, although Jay's kids' stockings overflowed, his poor pantyhose hung sadly empty. One year I decided to make his dream come true. I put on sunglasses and went in search of an inflatable love doll. They don't sell those things at Wal-Mart. I had to go to an adult bookstore downtown. If you've never been in an X-rated store, don't go. You'll only confuse yourself. I was there an hour saying things like, 'What does this do?' 'You're kidding me!' 'Who would buy that?' Finally, I made it to the inflatable doll section. I wanted to buy a standard, uncomplicated doll that could also substitute as a passenger in my truck so I could use the car pool lane during rush hour. Finding what I wanted was difficult. 'Love Dolls' come in many different models. The top of the line, according to the side of the box, could do things I'd only seen in a book on animal husbandry. I settled for 'Lovable Louise.' She was at the bottom of the price scale. To call Louise a 'doll' took a huge leap of imagination, but on Christmas Eve and with the help of an old bicycle pump, Louise came to life. My sister-in-law was in on the plan and let me in during the wee morning hours. Long after Santa had come and gone, I filled the dangling pantyhose with Louise's pliant (you might want to look this up) legs and bottom. I also ate some cookies and drank what remained of a glass of milk on a nearby tray I went home, and giggled for a couple of hours. The next morning my brother called to say that Santa had been to his house and left a present that had made him VERY happy, but had left the dog confused. She would bark, start to walk away, then come back and bark some more. We all agreed that Louise should remain in her pantyhose so the rest of the family could admire her when they came over for the traditional Christmas dinner. My grandmother noticed Louise the moment she walked in the door. 'What the hell is that?' she asked. My brother quickly explained, 'It's a doll.' 'Who would play with something like that?' Granny snapped. I kept my mouth shut. 'Where are her clothes?' Granny continued. 'Boy, that turkey sure smells nice, Gran,' Jay said, to steer her into the dining room. But Granny was relentless. 'Why doesn't she have any teeth?' Again, I could have answered, but why would I? It was Christmas and no one wanted to ride in the back of the ambulance saying, 'Hang on Granny, hang on!' My grandfather, a delightful old man with poor eyesight, sidled up to me and said, ' Hey, who's the naked gal by the fireplace?' I told him she was Jay's friend. A few minutes later I noticed Grandpa by the mantel, talking to Louise. Not just talking, but actually flirting. It was then that we realized this might be Grandpa's last Christmas at home. The dinner went well. We made the usual small talk about who had died, who was dying, and who should be killed, when suddenly Louise made a noise like my father in the bathroom in the morning. Then she lurched from the mantel, flew around the room twice, and fell in a heap in front of the sofa. The cat screamed. I passed cranberry sauce through my nose, and Grandpa ran across the room, fell to his knees, and began administering mouth-to-mouth resuscitation. My brother fell back over his chair and wet his pants. Granny threw down her napkin, stomped out of the room, and went to sit in the car. It was indeed a Christmas to treasure and remember. Later in my brother's garage, we conducted a thorough examination to decide the cause of Louise's collapse. We discovered that Louise had suffered from a hot ember to the back of her right thigh. Fortunately, thanks to a wonder drug called duct tape, we restored her to perfect health. I can't wait until next Christmas. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted December 25, 2008 Report Share Posted December 25, 2008 Things will work out for you. You always figure something out when it has to be done.I hope the next job is a little more secure.Have a happy holiday and worry about this other stuff in the New Year.God bless you girl and take care Gail Merry Christmas Merry Christmas & Happy Holidays everyone! I haven’t been around like I should have because of so much stress in my life this year, ending up with getting laid off on Dec 10. I was blessed to find a temp job quickly, and hopefully there will be more jobs available next month. My health is about the same. I’m still in pain most days from my shoulder surgery (the cold makes it worse) and from the pinched nerve on the other side. The cyst on my kidney is unchanged, so if it stays that way another year, we’re going to forget about it. I’m stocking up on all my meds before my insurance runs out and hopefully will have a job with insurance before I run out. My church and my mom’s boss (we have a long history) both gave me big gifts to give us a Christmas and be sure I can get by for a bit, so I am well and truly blessed this Christmas. I hope that all of you can say the same. I haven’t been reading the group or staying in touch, but I do think of you. Love, Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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