Re: For Ken To Tracie in Maine, from ken...with thanks, and joy...

[Guest guest]

Greetings, Traci in Maine( haha...that is how I " keep you in my mind " ...I LOVE

Maine, and whenever I went there, I always had fun..(m as a trucker)..I rue that

I never bought a Maine hat, because I don't think I'll ever get there, again)

But THAT'S not the reasonI am answering this! I am e-mailing, ( If I had

your address, I'd write, so the only way to get that, because I know that some

people are worried about their addresses on the " net, and they have good reason

for that, YOU would have to call me...If you would like to have me write, I

would LOVE to...My tel. is unlisted, but I have no qualms about sharing my tel.

or address with this group, because I LOVE them...ha, here I go again, sorry.

Tel.(828) 683-3144.

ANYWAY...back to " why " . Your advice is so right on target,and I can hear

and feel the warmth from you, in your writings! I Praise the Lord for people

like YOU ( and it seems that all IN this group share so much in common),

I wanted to tell you how much your messege meant to me. Thank you for caring

enough about me to write me back, with suce care,such concern,...you ARE such a

wonderful friend!!!!!!! When I 've found myself just sitting for hours, and

just finally notice it, and " open " my mail box, to find messeges such as

YOUR'S,( and like the OTHERS'S who have consoled me,) I feel not so lonely, not

so alone, and afraid. Thank you. I am going to get a lawyer, and , for what

seems like the first time, find the courage to show thesae " reletives " thah I am

not going to just be meek, and mild! I AM going to show these " people " , that I

will not accept their cruelty anymore,. My Brother, Barry, " holds the key to the

safe " , som to speak, by manipulating " himself into being " Executor " is going to

pay. And go to jail, for mis-appropiation of funds,conspiricy to defraud, grand

larceny, and fraud!!!!!!. I just don't care, even if the lawyer " gets it all! " .

I just want HIM , if only for a little

while, FEEL like I have been made to feel! And, thanks to the advice YOU HAVE

given me, and the advice of the rest of my true famile, HERE,I AM going to cut

the cancer out!!!!!! Barry's brain is seriously damaged, due to all his

drinking, and I really think he has entered the world of the insane!

Thank you, Tracie , for being MORE than " just a friend! "

all my love......ken

tracierae143 <tracierae143@...> wrote: Ken, I can so relate to your

childhood with alcoholics. Mine was no

easy ride, but I survived it and that was my main goal. I vowed to

be different from them and have done that to this day, not drinking,

not smoking, and being good to my children. I would just tell

myself as a child that I am NOT going to do that to my children if I

am blessed with them which I was. I am soooo sorry that they robbed

you of that. However, you did survive and that is so important. I

have gone through lots of therapy to deal with my isses and the most

important thing I have taught is that sometimes we have to cut out

those that are related to us by blood because they are bad for us

and they are NEVER going to change. You cannot change others, only

yourself. I found my family members that drink are poison in my

life and did just that, cut them out. I have limited contact with

them and always on my own terms, no alcohol is allowed, no smoking,

etc., and I prefer to visit them so if they become verbally abusive

I can just get up and leave. They have come to accept my resolve in

not taking their verbal abuse anymore. At first, I admit it was

heck, but I am a stronger better person today and my life is better

because I have this group and wonderful friends and of course my

spouse and children. I surround myself with those who love me for

me and do not abuse me. I hope you can do the same. There are some

fabulous books out there. One is called " Adult Children of

Alcoholics " I believe, good reading. I hope this helps and I hope

that you will just stop focusing on your past family and focus on

your family of today, i.e., the RA group, your spouse, friends, good

people. Forget those that hurt you. They are not worth your time

or energy. I know this sounds harsh, but you do not deserve to

continue to be verbally abused or emotionally abused. YOU are in

control of your life, NOT THEM. Remember that always.

Good luck.

Tracie