Guest guest Posted June 2, 2006 Report Share Posted June 2, 2006 In a message dated 6/2/06 8:52:10 AM, squarehead52@... writes: > .I look at my wristwatch, oit's been 3 hours I've been sitting here. I am > overwhelmed. The onl;y friends I have are you. Sorry this was so long. Please > forgive me. all my love, (what's not shaattered!) ....kenĀ > You need the book " Bad Childhood, Good Life " , by Dr. Scshlenger....(sp) Buy it NOW. Many of us in your shoes have been saved by it. Take action, do not let these people make you a victim and ruin the best part of your life. They are still punishing you, if you permit it. Good luck, Pris Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted June 2, 2006 Report Share Posted June 2, 2006 Ken, I can't possibly imagine how you feel or even what to say to you for the best, so i won't say anything other than you have lots of friends here who care very much for you and will always be here to listen. Thinking of you and keeping you in my prayers with love Your friend Helen xx kenneth samuelsen <squarehead52@...> wrote: Greetings to you all...the other day, when I posted about my father's death, I was having a temper tantrum, haha! You see, my mother and father were alcoholics, and very abusive to me, both verbally, and,well, other ways. It seemed that I was always the underdog, always the one singled out for terrible beatings and abuse. (There are some of you who know quite a bit more, and that is only because we have grown into close friendship, but I wish I could be close to ALL of you) To give you ab example..my two brothers and were always terrified of robert samuelsen. one cold snowy early evening, (all this is true) we were " stuck " inside because of the snow...My mother had been drinking all day, and I guess the noise of 3 boys playing in the house " got to her " . Even tho' I was in my pajamas, like my other 2 brothers,Myself, once again, got " the blame " . She sent my brothers to bed, and put me on the porch, to wait for dad to come home. I will never forget...I thought I was going to freeze to death!. Well, my father made it home, and as I started to follow him, in, he put his big hand on my face and pushed me back out side, saying that I must be out here for a reason, stay here till I find out what for, I went ballistic!! I remember banging on the door, screaming, and yelling....you know what he did? He called me into the kichen, poured a full Corningware pot of water over me, to " cool down my temper', and I must have said something, because I remember that the t.v. commercials said " Corning ware won't break " , and they were wrong! Because he broke it in half, on my head! Then got mad, 'cause the handle broke, and he broke the HANDLE too! Then I was put back out side, to " cool down " . I was seven years old. I ended up in the hospital. I had to have an operation ,something to do with my kidneys. I can't have children, do to that. and I adore children!My grandmother came and rescued me, and for quite a few years, she kept me. It was there, that I found out that this man was not my father. Now, in my older years, I can see what all took place. My mother had an affair, two years after they were married....and I was the result. I was a living breathing reminder in front of robert samuelsen's face, every day. That is why it seemed to me, that this man always put me down, embarressed me, ,and always had something nasty to say about me. My brothers heard al;l this, growing up. Barry, my youngest bro,taught HIS family to do the same thing....to me. When I broke my leg on the 9th, and I called himup, on the 21st, to say my feelings were hurt 'cause he hadn't ever even caled me, he said that because of that phone call, he would never speak to me again. Barry drinks at least a bottle of " Canadian Club " a day. I don't drink. But, before my father died he confessed to Barry, in an alcholic state,that the real name of my father was " Garbis Krone " , a Norwgian sailor, and Barry's attitude towards me got even worse! He never even told me dad was die-ing. he just called me to say he was dead, and would call me to tell me when the funerral wqould be. (please excuse the typing. little upset.) Id long ago forgiven this man. He was the only father I had. Before he died, Barry had himself declared power of attorney over robert samuelsen's affairs...then had him declared " incompetant " .At the Funeral home, no one talked to Tammy and I. NO ONE said a word to us!!.Barrys daughter snuck over to our house, after, to tell us that my 2 brothers got together to hatch a plan, where they get most of the money in his estate, and I get hardly anything.But!!!! My father HAD no will, and my mother's will said that everything got split three ways. but my brothers AND their family hate me. so I wont get anything. That is why I haven't posted much. I just sit here, alone, staring off into space...I look at my wristwatch, oit's been 3 hours I've been sitting here. I am overwhelmed. The onl;y friends I have are you. Sorry this was so long. Please forgive me. all my love, (what's not shaattered!) ....ken __________________________________________________ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted June 2, 2006 Report Share Posted June 2, 2006 Dear Ken, My heart goes out to you, I feel so terrible that you had to suffer such physical, emotional and mental abuse...I too was the product of alcholic parents, I did not suffer the physical abuse such as yourself. Mine was emotional, mental and wrought with neglect. My mom was a mean and bitter drunk. She would come into my room all hours of the night and just go off, everything about her life was miserable and she sure relayed that to me over and over till she would pass out..One had to be so careful as to what you said, she would take almost everything wrong and that would set her off. .My dad just got drunk and would pass out. Because they drank so much there was little money left for anything. My clothes game from Goodwill, very embarrassing my high school years, and I was lucky to get a healthy meal..Just a brief history to let you know that I can somewhat indentify with you and your pain..... Ken, I sure feel so very bad for you and Tammy that you had to endure such treatment at the funeral. I understand how much this hurts you.....Please be proud of yourself, for you have survived a terrible childhood and still have a wonderful heart and soul. And, please believe that you are so much better than your brothers, for you harbor no real hate for them and have not treated them badly as they have you....As for the will and the money, I can only imagine how hurt and shocked you are that they would do this to you....My advise, let your brothers have it...Do you really want something that is so tainted from the parents that abused you so badly..I wish you the very best...Please stay in touch, we care how you are. We are here for you. We are your friends and support...Hugs uelsen <squarehead52@...> wrote: Greetings to you all...the other day, when I posted about my father's death, I was having a temper tantrum, haha! You see, my mother and father were alcoholics, and very abusive to me, both verbally, and,well, other ways. It seemed that I was always the underdog, always the one singled out for terrible beatings and abuse. (There are some of you who know quite a bit more, and that is only because we have grown into close friendship, but I wish I could be close to ALL of you) To give you ab example..my two brothers and were always terrified of robert samuelsen. one cold snowy early evening, (all this is true) we were " stuck " inside because of the snow...My mother had been drinking all day, and I guess the noise of 3 boys playing in the house " got to her " . Even tho' I was in my pajamas, like my other 2 brothers,Myself, once again, got " the blame " . She sent my brothers to bed, and put me on the porch, to wait for dad to come home. I will never forget...I thought I was going to freeze to death!. Well, my father made it home, and as I started to follow him, in, he put his big hand on my face and pushed me back out side, saying that I must be out here for a reason, stay here till I find out what for, I went ballistic!! I remember banging on the door, screaming, and yelling....you know what he did? He called me into the kichen, poured a full Corningware pot of water over me, to " cool down my temper', and I must have said something, because I remember that the t.v. commercials said " Corning ware won't break " , and they were wrong! Because he broke it in half, on my head! Then got mad, 'cause the handle broke, and he broke the HANDLE too! Then I was put back out side, to " cool down " . I was seven years old. I ended up in the hospital. I had to have an operation ,something to do with my kidneys. I can't have children, do to that. and I adore children!My grandmother came and rescued me, and for quite a few years, she kept me. It was there, that I found out that this man was not my father. Now, in my older years, I can see what all took place. My mother had an affair, two years after they were married....and I was the result. I was a living breathing reminder in front of robert samuelsen's face, every day. That is why it seemed to me, that this man always put me down, embarressed me, ,and always had something nasty to say about me. My brothers heard al;l this, growing up. Barry, my youngest bro,taught HIS family to do the same thing....to me. When I broke my leg on the 9th, and I called himup, on the 21st, to say my feelings were hurt 'cause he hadn't ever even caled me, he said that because of that phone call, he would never speak to me again. Barry drinks at least a bottle of " Canadian Club " a day. I don't drink. But, before my father died he confessed to Barry, in an alcholic state,that the real name of my father was " Garbis Krone " , a Norwgian sailor, and Barry's attitude towards me got even worse! He never even told me dad was die-ing. he just called me to say he was dead, and would call me to tell me when the funerral wqould be. (please excuse the typing. little upset.) Id long ago forgiven this man. He was the only father I had. Before he died, Barry had himself declared power of attorney over robert samuelsen's affairs...then had him declared " incompetant " .At the Funeral home, no one talked to Tammy and I. NO ONE said a word to us!!.Barrys daughter snuck over to our house, after, to tell us that my 2 brothers got together to hatch a plan, where they get most of the money in his estate, and I get hardly anything.But!!!! My father HAD no will, and my mother's will said that everything got split three ways. but my brothers AND their family hate me. so I wont get anything. That is why I haven't posted much. I just sit here, alone, staring off into space...I look at my wristwatch, oit's been 3 hours I've been sitting here. I am overwhelmed. The onl;y friends I have are you. Sorry this was so long. Please forgive me. all my love, (what's not shaattered!) ....ken __________________________________________________ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted June 2, 2006 Report Share Posted June 2, 2006 Dear Ken MY Father comes from a family much like yours. Like him you should be proud that you have gone on to live a decent, productive life! It can not have been easy to overcome the childhood you had to become the kind and generous man you are today in WI linda yeakel <lindayeakel@...> wrote: Dear Ken, My heart goes out to you, I feel so terrible that you had to suffer such physical, emotional and mental abuse...I too was the product of alcholic parents, I did not suffer the physical abuse such as yourself. Mine was emotional, mental and wrought with neglect. My mom was a mean and bitter drunk. She would come into my room all hours of the night and just go off, everything about her life was miserable and she sure relayed that to me over and over till she would pass out..One had to be so careful as to what you said, she would take almost everything wrong and that would set her off. .My dad just got drunk and would pass out. Because they drank so much there was little money left for anything. My clothes game from Goodwill, very embarrassing my high school years, and I was lucky to get a healthy meal..Just a brief history to let you know that I can somewhat indentify with you and your pain..... Ken, I sure feel so very bad for you and Tammy that you had to endure such treatment at the funeral. I understand how much this hurts you.....Please be proud of yourself, for you have survived a terrible childhood and still have a wonderful heart and soul. And, please believe that you are so much better than your brothers, for you harbor no real hate for them and have not treated them badly as they have you....As for the will and the money, I can only imagine how hurt and shocked you are that they would do this to you....My advise, let your brothers have it...Do you really want something that is so tainted from the parents that abused you so badly..I wish you the very best...Please stay in touch, we care how you are. We are here for you. We are your friends and support...Hugs uelsen <squarehead52@...> wrote: Greetings to you all...the other day, when I posted about my father's death, I was having a temper tantrum, haha! You see, my mother and father were alcoholics, and very abusive to me, both verbally, and,well, other ways. It seemed that I was always the underdog, always the one singled out for terrible beatings and abuse. (There are some of you who know quite a bit more, and that is only because we have grown into close friendship, but I wish I could be close to ALL of you) To give you ab example..my two brothers and were always terrified of robert samuelsen. one cold snowy early evening, (all this is true) we were " stuck " inside because of the snow...My mother had been drinking all day, and I guess the noise of 3 boys playing in the house " got to her " . Even tho' I was in my pajamas, like my other 2 brothers,Myself, once again, got " the blame " . She sent my brothers to bed, and put me on the porch, to wait for dad to come home. I will never forget...I thought I was going to freeze to death!. Well, my father made it home, and as I started to follow him, in, he put his big hand on my face and pushed me back out side, saying that I must be out here for a reason, stay here till I find out what for, I went ballistic!! I remember banging on the door, screaming, and yelling....you know what he did? He called me into the kichen, poured a full Corningware pot of water over me, to " cool down my temper', and I must have said something, because I remember that the t.v. commercials said " Corning ware won't break " , and they were wrong! Because he broke it in half, on my head! Then got mad, 'cause the handle broke, and he broke the HANDLE too! Then I was put back out side, to " cool down " . I was seven years old. I ended up in the hospital. I had to have an operation ,something to do with my kidneys. I can't have children, do to that. and I adore children!My grandmother came and rescued me, and for quite a few years, she kept me. It was there, that I found out that this man was not my father. Now, in my older years, I can see what all took place. My mother had an affair, two years after they were married....and I was the result. I was a living breathing reminder in front of robert samuelsen's face, every day. That is why it seemed to me, that this man always put me down, embarressed me, ,and always had something nasty to say about me. My brothers heard al;l this, growing up. Barry, my youngest bro,taught HIS family to do the same thing....to me. When I broke my leg on the 9th, and I called himup, on the 21st, to say my feelings were hurt 'cause he hadn't ever even caled me, he said that because of that phone call, he would never speak to me again. Barry drinks at least a bottle of " Canadian Club " a day. I don't drink. But, before my father died he confessed to Barry, in an alcholic state,that the real name of my father was " Garbis Krone " , a Norwgian sailor, and Barry's attitude towards me got even worse! He never even told me dad was die-ing. he just called me to say he was dead, and would call me to tell me when the funerral wqould be. (please excuse the typing. little upset.) Id long ago forgiven this man. He was the only father I had. Before he died, Barry had himself declared power of attorney over robert samuelsen's affairs...then had him declared " incompetant " .At the Funeral home, no one talked to Tammy and I. NO ONE said a word to us!!.Barrys daughter snuck over to our house, after, to tell us that my 2 brothers got together to hatch a plan, where they get most of the money in his estate, and I get hardly anything.But!!!! My father HAD no will, and my mother's will said that everything got split three ways. but my brothers AND their family hate me. so I wont get anything. That is why I haven't posted much. I just sit here, alone, staring off into space...I look at my wristwatch, oit's been 3 hours I've been sitting here. I am overwhelmed. The onl;y friends I have are you. Sorry this was so long. Please forgive me. all my love, (what's not shaattered!) ....ken __________________________________________________ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted June 2, 2006 Report Share Posted June 2, 2006 Ken, that's a horrible story. You have endured a great deal. I hope you will find a way to heal. You have my prayers. Not an MD I'll tell you where to go! Mayo Clinic in Rochester http://www.mayoclinic.org/rochester s Hopkins Medicine http://www.hopkinsmedicine.org ::From ken.(a long post),an apology and explaination.please read Greetings to you all...the other day, when I posted about my father's death, I was having a temper tantrum, haha! You see, my mother and father were alcoholics, and very abusive to me, both verbally, and,well, other ways. It seemed that I was always the underdog, always the one singled out for terrible beatings and abuse. (There are some of you who know quite a bit more, and that is only because we have grown into close friendship, but I wish I could be close to ALL of you) To give you ab example..my two brothers and were always terrified of robert samuelsen. one cold snowy early evening, (all this is true) we were " stuck " inside because of the snow...My mother had been drinking all day, and I guess the noise of 3 boys playing in the house " got to her " . Even tho' I was in my pajamas, like my other 2 brothers,Myself, once again, got " the blame " . She sent my brothers to bed, and put me on the porch, to wait for dad to come home. I will never forget...I thought I was going to freeze to death!. Well, my father made it home, and as I started to follow him, in, he put his big hand on my face and pushed me back out side, saying that I must be out here for a reason, stay here till I find out what for, I went ballistic!! I remember banging on the door, screaming, and yelling....you know what he did? He called me into the kichen, poured a full Corningware pot of water over me, to " cool down my temper', and I must have said something, because I remember that the t.v. commercials said " Corning ware won't break " , and they were wrong! Because he broke it in half, on my head! Then got mad, 'cause the handle broke, and he broke the HANDLE too! Then I was put back out side, to " cool down " . I was seven years old. I ended up in the hospital. I had to have an operation ,something to do with my kidneys. I can't have children, do to that. and I adore children!My grandmother came and rescued me, and for quite a few years, she kept me. It was there, that I found out that this man was not my father. Now, in my older years, I can see what all took place. My mother had an affair, two years after they were married....and I was the result. I was a living breathing reminder in front of robert samuelsen's face, every day. That is why it seemed to me, that this man always put me down, embarressed me, ,and always had something nasty to say about me. My brothers heard al;l this, growing up. Barry, my youngest bro,taught HIS family to do the same thing....to me. When I broke my leg on the 9th, and I called himup, on the 21st, to say my feelings were hurt 'cause he hadn't ever even caled me, he said that because of that phone call, he would never speak to me again. Barry drinks at least a bottle of " Canadian Club " a day. I don't drink. But, before my father died he confessed to Barry, in an alcholic state,that the real name of my father was " Garbis Krone " , a Norwgian sailor, and Barry's attitude towards me got even worse! He never even told me dad was die-ing. he just called me to say he was dead, and would call me to tell me when the funerral wqould be. (please excuse the typing. little upset.) Id long ago forgiven this man. He was the only father I had. Before he died, Barry had himself declared power of attorney over robert samuelsen's affairs...then had him declared " incompetant " .At the Funeral home, no one talked to Tammy and I. NO ONE said a word to us!!.Barrys daughter snuck over to our house, after, to tell us that my 2 brothers got together to hatch a plan, where they get most of the money in his estate, and I get hardly anything.But!!!! My father HAD no will, and my mother's will said that everything got split three ways. but my brothers AND their family hate me. so I wont get anything. That is why I haven't posted much. I just sit here, alone, staring off into space...I look at my wristwatch, oit's been 3 hours I've been sitting here. I am overwhelmed. The onl;y friends I have are you. Sorry this was so long. Please forgive me. all my love, (what's not shaattered!) ....ken Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted June 2, 2006 Report Share Posted June 2, 2006 Greetings, Helen...Thank you for that wonderful post to me...God knew what He was Doing, leading me to this group, where He knew I would find People like yoiu. .Thank you for your friendship.! All my love, ken: Ken, I can't possibly imagine how you feel or even what to say to you for the best, so i won't say anything other than you have lots of friends here who care very much for you and will always be here to listen. Thinking of you and keeping you in my prayers with love Your friend Helen xx kenneth samuelsen <squarehead52@...> wrote: Greetings to you all...the other day, when I posted about my father's death, I was having a temper tantrum, haha! You see, my mother and father were alcoholics, and very abusive to me, both verbally, and,well, other ways. It seemed that I was always the underdog, always the one singled out for terrible beatings and abuse. (There are some of you who know quite a bit more, and that is only because we have grown into close friendship, but I wish I could be close to ALL of you) To give you ab example..my two brothers and were always terrified of robert samuelsen. one cold snowy early evening, (all this is true) we were " stuck " inside because of the snow...My mother had been drinking all day, and I guess the noise of 3 boys playing in the house " got to her " . Even tho' I was in my pajamas, like my other 2 brothers,Myself, once again, got " the blame " . She sent my brothers to bed, and put me on the porch, to wait for dad to come home. I will never forget...I thought I was going to freeze to death!. Well, my father made it home, and as I started to follow him, in, he put his big hand on my face and pushed me back out side, saying that I must be out here for a reason, stay here till I find out what for, I went ballistic!! I remember banging on the door, screaming, and yelling....you know what he did? He called me into the kichen, poured a full Corningware pot of water over me, to " cool down my temper', and I must have said something, because I remember that the t.v. commercials said " Corning ware won't break " , and they were wrong! Because he broke it in half, on my head! Then got mad, 'cause the handle broke, and he broke the HANDLE too! Then I was put back out side, to " cool down " . I was seven years old. I ended up in the hospital. I had to have an operation ,something to do with my kidneys. I can't have children, do to that. and I adore children!My grandmother came and rescued me, and for quite a few years, she kept me. It was there, that I found out that this man was not my father. Now, in my older years, I can see what all took place. My mother had an affair, two years after they were married....and I was the result. I was a living breathing reminder in front of robert samuelsen's face, every day. That is why it seemed to me, that this man always put me down, embarressed me, ,and always had something nasty to say about me. My brothers heard al;l this, growing up. Barry, my youngest bro,taught HIS family to do the same thing....to me. When I broke my leg on the 9th, and I called himup, on the 21st, to say my feelings were hurt 'cause he hadn't ever even caled me, he said that because of that phone call, he would never speak to me again. Barry drinks at least a bottle of " Canadian Club " a day. I don't drink. But, before my father died he confessed to Barry, in an alcholic state,that the real name of my father was " Garbis Krone " , a Norwgian sailor, and Barry's attitude towards me got even worse! He never even told me dad was die-ing. he just called me to say he was dead, and would call me to tell me when the funerral wqould be. (please excuse the typing. little upset.) Id long ago forgiven this man. He was the only father I had. Before he died, Barry had himself declared power of attorney over robert samuelsen's affairs...then had him declared " incompetant " .At the Funeral home, no one talked to Tammy and I. NO ONE said a word to us!!.Barrys daughter snuck over to our house, after, to tell us that my 2 brothers got together to hatch a plan, where they get most of the money in his estate, and I get hardly anything.But!!!! My father HAD no will, and my mother's will said that everything got split three ways. but my brothers AND their family hate me. so I wont get anything. That is why I haven't posted much. I just sit here, alone, staring off into space...I look at my wristwatch, oit's been 3 hours I've been sitting here. I am overwhelmed. The onl;y friends I have are you. Sorry this was so long. Please forgive me. all my love, (what's not shaattered!) ....ken __________________________________________________ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted June 2, 2006 Report Share Posted June 2, 2006 Whoa, Ken, that's heavy. You went through hell.... and made so far. That's quite a tribute to your good character. Cheers. kenneth samuelsen <squarehead52@...> wrote: Greetings, Helen...Thank you for that wonderful post to me...God knew what He was Doing, leading me to this group, where He knew I would find People like yoiu. .Thank you for your friendship.! All my love, ken: Ken, I can't possibly imagine how you feel or even what to say to you for the best, so i won't say anything other than you have lots of friends here who care very much for you and will always be here to listen. Thinking of you and keeping you in my prayers with love Your friend Helen xx kenneth samuelsen wrote: Greetings to you all...the other day, when I posted about my father's death, I was having a temper tantrum, haha! You see, my mother and father were alcoholics, and very abusive to me, both verbally, and,well, other ways. It seemed that I was always the underdog, always the one singled out for terrible beatings and abuse. (There are some of you who know quite a bit more, and that is only because we have grown into close friendship, but I wish I could be close to ALL of you) To give you ab example..my two brothers and were always terrified of robert samuelsen. one cold snowy early evening, (all this is true) we were " stuck " inside because of the snow...My mother had been drinking all day, and I guess the noise of 3 boys playing in the house " got to her " . Even tho' I was in my pajamas, like my other 2 brothers,Myself, once again, got " the blame " . She sent my brothers to bed, and put me on the porch, to wait for dad to come home. I will never forget...I thought I was going to freeze to death!. Well, my father made it home, and as I started to follow him, in, he put his big hand on my face and pushed me back out side, saying that I must be out here for a reason, stay here till I find out what for, I went ballistic!! I remember banging on the door, screaming, and yelling....you know what he did? He called me into the kichen, poured a full Corningware pot of water over me, to " cool down my temper', and I must have said something, because I remember that the t.v. commercials said " Corning ware won't break " , and they were wrong! Because he broke it in half, on my head! Then got mad, 'cause the handle broke, and he broke the HANDLE too! Then I was put back out side, to " cool down " . I was seven years old. I ended up in the hospital. I had to have an operation ,something to do with my kidneys. I can't have children, do to that. and I adore children!My grandmother came and rescued me, and for quite a few years, she kept me. It was there, that I found out that this man was not my father. Now, in my older years, I can see what all took place. My mother had an affair, two years after they were married....and I was the result. I was a living breathing reminder in front of robert samuelsen's face, every day. That is why it seemed to me, that this man always put me down, embarressed me, ,and always had something nasty to say about me. My brothers heard al;l this, growing up. Barry, my youngest bro,taught HIS family to do the same thing....to me. When I broke my leg on the 9th, and I called himup, on the 21st, to say my feelings were hurt 'cause he hadn't ever even caled me, he said that because of that phone call, he would never speak to me again. Barry drinks at least a bottle of " Canadian Club " a day. I don't drink. But, before my father died he confessed to Barry, in an alcholic state,that the real name of my father was " Garbis Krone " , a Norwgian sailor, and Barry's attitude towards me got even worse! He never even told me dad was die-ing. he just called me to say he was dead, and would call me to tell me when the funerral wqould be. (please excuse the typing. little upset.) Id long ago forgiven this man. He was the only father I had. Before he died, Barry had himself declared power of attorney over robert samuelsen's affairs...then had him declared " incompetant " .At the Funeral home, no one talked to Tammy and I. NO ONE said a word to us!!.Barrys daughter snuck over to our house, after, to tell us that my 2 brothers got together to hatch a plan, where they get most of the money in his estate, and I get hardly anything.But!!!! My father HAD no will, and my mother's will said that everything got split three ways. but my brothers AND their family hate me. so I wont get anything. That is why I haven't posted much. I just sit here, alone, staring off into space...I look at my wristwatch, oit's been 3 hours I've been sitting here. I am overwhelmed. The onl;y friends I have are you. Sorry this was so long. Please forgive me. all my love, (what's not shaattered!) ....ken __________________________________________________ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted June 2, 2006 Report Share Posted June 2, 2006 Dear ken, I have not been contributing to this group for ages, but your message just broke my heart. My heart goes out to you, for all you have been through whilst growing up, no body should have to endure what you have. All I can say is you have a great group of people here to support you anytime ...and that you are an amazing man to have survived all of this. Chin up, don't let them bet you --::From ken.(a long post),an apology and explaination.please read Greetings to you all...the other day, when I posted about my father's death, I was having a temper tantrum, haha! You see, my mother and father were alcoholics, and very abusive to me, both verbally, and,well, other ways. It seemed that I was always the underdog, always the one singled out for terrible beatings and abuse. (There are some of you who know quite a bit more, and that is only because we have grown into close friendship, but I wish I could be close to ALL of you) To give you ab example..my two brothers and were always terrified of robert samuelsen. one cold snowy early evening, (all this is true) we were " stuck " inside because of the snow...My mother had been drinking all day, and I guess the noise of 3 boys playing in the house " got to her " . Even tho' I was in my pajamas, like my other 2 brothers,Myself, once again, got " the blame " . She sent my brothers to bed, and put me on the porch, to wait for dad to come home. I will never forget...I thought I was going to freeze to death!. Well, my father made it home, and as I started to follow him, in, he put his big hand on my face and pushed me back out side, saying that I must be out here for a reason, stay here till I find out what for, I went ballistic!! I remember banging on the door, screaming, and yelling....you know what he did? He called me into the kichen, poured a full Corningware pot of water over me, to " cool down my temper', and I must have said something, because I remember that the t.v. commercials said " Corning ware won't break " , and they were wrong! Because he broke it in half, on my head! Then got mad, 'cause the handle broke, and he broke the HANDLE too! Then I was put back out side, to " cool down " . I was seven years old. I ended up in the hospital. I had to have an operation ,something to do with my kidneys. I can't have children, do to that. and I adore children!My grandmother came and rescued me, and for quite a few years, she kept me. It was there, that I found out that this man was not my father. Now, in my older years, I can see what all took place. My mother had an affair, two years after they were married....and I was the result. I was a living breathing reminder in front of robert samuelsen's face, every day. That is why it seemed to me, that this man always put me down, embarressed me, ,and always had something nasty to say about me. My brothers heard al;l this, growing up. Barry, my youngest bro,taught HIS family to do the same thing....to me. When I broke my leg on the 9th, and I called himup, on the 21st, to say my feelings were hurt 'cause he hadn't ever even caled me, he said that because of that phone call, he would never speak to me again. Barry drinks at least a bottle of " Canadian Club " a day. I don't drink. But, before my father died he confessed to Barry, in an alcholic state,that the real name of my father was " Garbis Krone " , a Norwgian sailor, and Barry's attitude towards me got even worse! He never even told me dad was die-ing. he just called me to say he was dead, and would call me to tell me when the funerral wqould be. (please excuse the typing. little upset.) Id long ago forgiven this man. He was the only father I had. Before he died, Barry had himself declared power of attorney over robert samuelsen's affairs...then had him declared " incompetant " .At the Funeral home, no one talked to Tammy and I. NO ONE said a word to us!!.Barrys daughter snuck over to our house, after, to tell us that my 2 brothers got together to hatch a plan, where they get most of the money in his estate, and I get hardly anything.But!!!! My father HAD no will and my mother's will said that everything got split three ways. but my brothers AND their family hate me. so I wont get anything. That is why I haven't posted much. I just sit here, alone, staring off into space...I look at my wristwatch, oit's been 3 hours I've been sitting here. I am overwhelmed. The onl;y friends I have are you. Sorry this was so long. Please forgive me. all my love, (what's not shaattered!) ....ken __________________________________________________ Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted June 3, 2006 Report Share Posted June 3, 2006 Ken, I am so sorry for all that you have went through. Its so hard to forgive and let go, I know from experience. I just want you to know you have many friends here, and you will be in my prayers, Tawny Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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