Fwd: [communicating] Fwd: WHY IS A CHILD NOT TALKING? a practical guide - spread it around.

[Guest guest]

WHY IS

MY CHILD A LATE TALKER?

 

                                                   

               Mac

 Communicating Partners

This

is

in response to a parent asking about the causes of

her child not

talking.  My book Communicating

Partners

discusses this in great detail,. This is a a 

summary for you to keep handy  as

a

valuable  guide to help your child

talk. Avoid wasting time  on the

causes. Use

that time to get the job done with the strategies

below.

Many

wonder why a child is not talking.

Surprise!

You can 

help  him  talk

without knowing why he isn’t!!

                                   

                     

After

40 years of clinical and research work with

“late-talking” children, I find the answer is complex

both in the child’s make

up and his  interactions.  Many

speculate

on the reasons and generally get nowhere. A better

path is to see how we can

get the child communicating more. Thousands of parents

and others have helped

children become talkers without really knowing why he

was a late-talker. 

Let’s

not waste precious time looking to

causes when we now know what we can do to help a

child develop communicatively.

 

First

of all, let’s ask: Where does a child learn to

communicate and talk best?  Often when a

child is language delayed, parents look to therapists

or teachers to help.  Professionals can

help but mainly when they

are teaching parents how to do it in the home.  

Families have the most contacts with a child

and the one thing that it

takes is constant interactive contacts

that fit the child’s developmental world.

 

You

will get much further by asking, “How can I help

my child communicate and talk? than “Why is he not

talking? "       Unless there are notable

medical

reasons, which are very rare, we will never know why.

But we do know now how to

help him become a talker.

 

 

 

 

COMMON

PROBLEMS INTERFERING WITH  TALKING.

Forty

years of research reveal many strategies and

events that help a child communicate.  Before

we

get to them, let’s summarize the common problems that

interfere with a child

learning to talk.

 

1.   

Not enough

interaction.  Often 

“late-talking children "   interact less with

people. If a child is not interacting he is not

getting practice or models for

what to do.

2.   

Overstimulation. Many children

are in constant situations where others are talking so

much that the child

cannot try to do what he can do.

3.   

 Ignoring the

little steps.   Often

people do not respond to the sounds and

movements that the child must do before he talks. 

Every sound and movement can become a word

but not if  it is ignored.

4.   

Pressure to

do the impossible.  Often

well-meaning

adults try to get a child to talk before he is ready.

Then both the child and

adults come to believe he cannot talk. Then he gets

less practice and success.

5.   

Not enough

sounding practice.  Making

sounds

is easy for some and very difficult for others. When a

child does not readily

move from sounds to words, he needs more practice and

modeling from people who

sound in ways he can do.

6.   

Not enough

meaningful play.   Play is the

developmental work of a child. If he does not play

much in different ways, he

is not having much to communicate about. The more a

child plays, the more

meanings he will develop. And those meanings are the

basis of words. 

7.   

Learned

helplessness. Often when a child is not

developing as expected,

adults do things he really can do for himself. And so

he let others do for

him.  Adults often talk for a child who

can try a little.

8.   

Imbalance in

interactions.  Often

adults

will take many more turns and talk so much that a

child won't try.   Children  need time

to communicate and it

is difficult for adults to wait silently and allow the

child to do what he can.

9.   

Developmental

steps are not enough. Adults are anxious for

words and so they do not

support the little sound and action steps that

children must do  to learn to 

speak.  When children's little steps are

not supported, they do less of them and so talk less.

10.                 

Too little social language.  When a

child is a delayed adults  frequently

focus on teaching words for school and not words for

things  the child needs to

communicate and describe his world.  He

may learn language as something to imitate or answer

but not to use to interact

daily with his family.

11.

 

Little chance to communicate. 

Many late talking children are given little

opportunity to practice

talking. The competent people around him often run the

verbal show and he does not get  enough practice.

12.  Too much correction or

criticism. 

When a child is corrected or criticized for

the way he talks, he is likely to talk and practice

less.  We need to realize that the child

is not

making mistakes, he is taking developmental steps.

 

 

In our

decades of clinical research with

over 2000 families we have found many reliable ways

that help children talk.

They are easy and  can happen anytime.

 

First,

lets ask the question: “What does

your child need to do before he is a constant talker? 

Very

few people understand what children and parents

need to do before speech. So the first answer to the

question- When will my

child talk?  is when he interacts

frequently with people who are doing actions and

sounds he can do.  A major finding is

that children talk more

when they interact more with possible people.

‘Possible’ here means people who

are interacting and communicating in ways the child

can do.

 

So,

first a child must interact frequently. He cannot

be a loner. He needs to initiate, respond, imitate,

and take turns with people

who are acting and communicating in ways he can do. 

Too often a late-talking child lives in a

world with many more words and actions that he can do.

It is a lonely, and

impossible world. We must make learning easier for the

child.

 

Then,

the child needs to communicate, that

is,  send and respond to messages with any actions or

sounds he can do.  Most adults are

anxious for a child to say

words and they do not support the child’s soundings,

which are critical steps

to word.

When

many adults try to get a child to

talk, they rush to language too soon and the child and

adult both think he

cannot talk because the models and expectations are

impossible for the child.

 

HOW CAN

YOU HELP YOUR CHILD TALK?

Use

the strategies below to help your child talk. They

have proved to be successful in thousands of children.

1.   

Play in his

world so

he will interact more with you.

2.   

 Match his

actions. Do things he

can do so he acts more like you. These will be his

first communications.

3.   

Match his

communications.  Communicate

in ways the child does and can try. Many adults talk 

in ways a child cannot do.

4.   

Get into his

world of sounds and actions.   You are used to a world of

thought and language but

he is not ready for that.  Many late

talking children need a great deal of social sounding,

that is, making sounds

back and forth with people who are showing next

steps. 

5.   

 Translate

sounds and actions into words.  When you do

not understand your child imitate

then translate what he does into one or two words

showing him the next step.

6.   

Play

frequent sounding games.   Sounds are like balls to

a child wanting to be a

baseball player. Just as you would throw balls back

and forth many times with

such a child, you will benefit by throwing sounds back

and forth with your

child so he gets the practice to learn 

and say sounds more clearly.

7.   

Balance with

your child by doing only as much as he

is doing with sounds or

words. He needs time to practice.

8.   

Wait

silently and do not talk for your child.  He needs time and he will

talk less if

you talk more.  The less you talk when

interacting, the more he will talk.  It

is so easy to talk for your child and then he gets

little practice.

 

 

Finding

the causes of  " late-talking "   is

much less important than finding the solutions. And many solutions are in

the ways

parents and others interact daily with the child.

 

Look at

your child and ask:

How

often do people do the strategies

above?

How

possible, patient and interesting

are they?

Be honest. People may occasionally talk about his

play or imitate him, but a late talking child needs a

constant life of these

strategies. And once a week isolated therapy will not

do it. It must be a

frequent way of life.  Parents need to

be

a matched and balanced and responsive playmate not a

therapist or teacher.

 

The

causes are in the past:

 The

solutions

are in the present.

 You

can be the cause of your child talking

more.

 

For more

guidelines see the book Play to

Talk (2007) and Communicating Partners (2004)

Dr. Jim

Mac

Website: www.communicating

partners.com

E-mail: jamesmacdonald78@...

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found in this message.

Checked by AVG - www.avg.com

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[Guest guest]

Do we have the book Play to Talk in the lending library? Sent from my iPhone

WHY IS

MY CHILD A LATE TALKER?

Mac

Communicating Partners

This

is

in response to a parent asking about the causes of

her child not

talking. My book Communicating

Partners

discusses this in great detail,. This is a a

summary for you to keep handy as

a

valuable guide to help your child

talk. Avoid wasting time on the

causes. Use

that time to get the job done with the strategies

below.

Many

wonder why a child is not talking.

Surprise!

You can

help him talk

without knowing why he isn’t!!

After

40 years of clinical and research work with

“late-talking†children, I find the answer is complex

both in the child’s make

up and his interactions. Many

speculate

on the reasons and generally get nowhere. A better

path is to see how we can

get the child communicating more. Thousands of parents

and others have helped

children become talkers without really knowing why he

was a late-talker.

Let’s

not waste precious time looking to

causes when we now know what we can do to help a

child develop communicatively.

First

of all, let’s ask: Where does a child learn to

communicate and talk best? Often when a

child is language delayed, parents look to therapists

or teachers to help. Professionals can

help but mainly when they

are teaching parents how to do it in the home.

Families have the most contacts with a child

and the one thing that it

takes is constant interactive contacts

that fit the child’s developmental world.

You

will get much further by asking, “How can I help

my child communicate and talk? than “Why is he not

talking?" Unless there are notable

medical

reasons, which are very rare, we will never know why.

But we do know now how to

help him become a talker.

COMMON

PROBLEMS INTERFERING WITH TALKING.

Forty

years of research reveal many strategies and

events that help a child communicate. Before

we

get to them, let’s summarize the common problems that

interfere with a child

learning to talk.

1.

Not enough

interaction. Often

“late-talking children" interact less with

people. If a child is not interacting he is not

getting practice or models for

what to do.

2.

Overstimulation. Many children

are in constant situations where others are talking so

much that the child

cannot try to do what he can do.

3.

Ignoring the

little steps. Often

people do not respond to the sounds and

movements that the child must do before he talks.

Every sound and movement can become a word

but not if it is ignored.

4.

Pressure to

do the impossible. Often

well-meaning

adults try to get a child to talk before he is ready.

Then both the child and

adults come to believe he cannot talk. Then he gets

less practice and success.

5.

Not enough

sounding practice. Making

sounds

is easy for some and very difficult for others. When a

child does not readily

move from sounds to words, he needs more practice and

modeling from people who

sound in ways he can do.

6.

Not enough

meaningful play. Play is the

developmental work of a child. If he does not play

much in different ways, he

is not having much to communicate about. The more a

child plays, the more

meanings he will develop. And those meanings are the

basis of words.

7.

Learned

helplessness. Often when a child is not

developing as expected,

adults do things he really can do for himself. And so

he let others do for

him. Adults often talk for a child who

can try a little.

8.

Imbalance in

interactions. Often

adults

will take many more turns and talk so much that a

child won't try. Children need time

to communicate and it

is difficult for adults to wait silently and allow the

child to do what he can.

9.

Developmental

steps are not enough. Adults are anxious for

words and so they do not

support the little sound and action steps that

children must do to learn to

speak. When children's little steps are

not supported, they do less of them and so talk less.

10.

Too little social language. When a

child is a delayed adults frequently

focus on teaching words for school and not words for

things the child needs to

communicate and describe his world. He

may learn language as something to imitate or answer

but not to use to interact

daily with his family.

11.

Little chance to communicate.

Many late talking children are given little

opportunity to practice

talking. The competent people around him often run the

verbal show and he does not get enough practice.

12. Too much correction or

criticism.

When a child is corrected or criticized for

the way he talks, he is likely to talk and practice

less. We need to realize that the child

is not

making mistakes, he is taking developmental steps.

In our

decades of clinical research with

over 2000 families we have found many reliable ways

that help children talk.

They are easy and can happen anytime.

First,

lets ask the question: “What does

your child need to do before he is a constant talker?

Very

few people understand what children and parents

need to do before speech. So the first answer to the

question- When will my

child talk? is when he interacts

frequently with people who are doing actions and

sounds he can do. A major finding is

that children talk more

when they interact more with possible people.

‘Possible’ here means people who

are interacting and communicating in ways the child

can do.

So,

first a child must interact frequently. He cannot

be a loner. He needs to initiate, respond, imitate,

and take turns with people

who are acting and communicating in ways he can do.

Too often a late-talking child lives in a

world with many more words and actions that he can do.

It is a lonely, and

impossible world. We must make learning easier for the

child.

Then,

the child needs to communicate, that

is, send and respond to messages with any actions or

sounds he can do. Most adults are

anxious for a child to say

words and they do not support the child’s soundings,

which are critical steps

to word.

When

many adults try to get a child to

talk, they rush to language too soon and the child and

adult both think he

cannot talk because the models and expectations are

impossible for the child.

HOW CAN

YOU HELP YOUR CHILD TALK?

Use

the strategies below to help your child talk. They

have proved to be successful in thousands of children.

1.

Play in his

world so

he will interact more with you.

2.

Match his

actions. Do things he

can do so he acts more like you. These will be his

first communications.

3.

Match his

communications. Communicate

in ways the child does and can try. Many adults talk

in ways a child cannot do.

4.

Get into his

world of sounds and actions. You are used to a world of

thought and language but

he is not ready for that. Many late

talking children need a great deal of social sounding,

that is, making sounds

back and forth with people who are showing next

steps.

5.

Translate

sounds and actions into words. When you do

not understand your child imitate

then translate what he does into one or two words

showing him the next step.

6.

Play

frequent sounding games. Sounds are like balls to

a child wanting to be a

baseball player. Just as you would throw balls back

and forth many times with

such a child, you will benefit by throwing sounds back

and forth with your

child so he gets the practice to learn

and say sounds more clearly.

7.

Balance with

your child by doing only as much as he

is doing with sounds or

words. He needs time to practice.

8.

Wait

silently and do not talk for your child. He needs time and he will

talk less if

you talk more. The less you talk when

interacting, the more he will talk. It

is so easy to talk for your child and then he gets

little practice.

Finding

the causes of "late-talking" is

much less important than finding the solutions. And many solutions are in

the ways

parents and others interact daily with the child.

Look at

your child and ask:

How

often do people do the strategies

above?

How

possible, patient and interesting

are they?

Be honest. People may occasionally talk about his

play or imitate him, but a late talking child needs a

constant life of these

strategies. And once a week isolated therapy will not

do it. It must be a

frequent way of life. Parents need to

be

a matched and balanced and responsive playmate not a

therapist or teacher.

The

causes are in the past:

The

solutions

are in the present.

You

can be the cause of your child talking

more.

For more

guidelines see the book Play to

Talk (2007) and Communicating Partners (2004)

Dr. Jim

Mac

Website: www.communicating

partners.com

E-mail: jamesmacdonald78@...

No virus

found in this message.

Checked by AVG - www.avg.com

Version: 2012.0.1901 / Virus Database: 2109/4757 - Release Date:

01/21/12

No virus found in this message.

Checked by AVG - www.avg.com

Version: 2012.0.2195 / Virus Database: 2437/5122 - Release Date: 07/09/12