+ BPD Information Guide +

[Guest guest]

Hi KOs,

One of the things I do around here, besides being one of the

moderators/facilitators on the WelcomeToOz Family of NonBP support

groups, is help Randi answer some of the email that comes into BPD

Central.

We receive all kinds of questions from both Nons and BPs all over the

world. SWOE is now being translated into several languages. We've

accumulated lots of answers and website URLs and I've organized them

into the following sections -- and thought you'd like to have a copy.

1 - What Is BPD?

2 - Email Support Groups

3 - Therapy

4 - Books and Booklets

5 - Live Chat and Regional Support Groups

_________

1 - WHAT IS BPD?

Mental disorders are classified in the DSM-IV, the 4th edition of The

Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of the Am Psychiatric Assn (ie, the

psychiatrist's 'bible'). For those who would like to examine the DSM-IV,

an online version is located at (then scroll down to Personality

Disorders):

http://www.psychologynet.org/dsm.html

Things to keep in mind:

* EVERYONE has all the BPD traits to a certain extent. Especially

teenagers. For one to be diagnosed with BPD, the traits must be

long-standing (lasting years) and persistent. And they must be INTENSE.

* Be very careful about diagnosing yourself or others. In fact, don't do

it. Top researchers guide patients through several days of testing

before they make a diagnosis. Don't make your own diagnosis on the basis

of a WWW site or a book!

* Many people who have BPD also have other concerns, such as depression,

eating disorders, substance abuse--even multiple personality disorder or

attention deficit disorder. It can be difficult to isolate what is BPD

and what might be something else. Again, you need to talk to a

*qualified* professional familiar with treating BPD.

~The DSM Definition of BPD:

A pervasive pattern of instability of interpersonal relationships,

self-image, and affects (moods), and marked impulsivity beginning by

early adulthood and present in a variety of contexts, as indicated by

five (or more) of the following:

1. Frantic efforts to avoid real or imagined abandonment. Note: Do not

include suicidal or self-mutilating behavior covered in (5).

2. A pattern of unstable and intense interpersonal relationships

characterized by alternating between extremes of idealization and

devaluation. This is called " splitting. "

3. Identity disturbance: markedly and persistently unstable self-image

or sense of self.

4. Impulsivity in at least two areas that are potentially self-damaging

(e.g., spending, sex, substance abuse, reckless driving, binge eating,

shoplifting). Note: Do not include suicidal or self-mutilating behavior

covered in (5).

5. Recurrent suicidal behavior, gestures, or threats, or

self-mutilating behavior.

6. Affective instability (rapid mood changes) due to a marked

reactivity of mood (e.g., intense episodic dysphoria, irritability, or

anxiety usually lasting a few hours and only rarely more than a few

days).

7. Chronic feelings of emptiness.

8. Inappropriate, intense anger or difficulty controlling anger (e.g.,

frequent displays of temper, constant anger, recurrent physical fights).

9. Transient, stress-related paranoid ideation or severe dissociative

symptoms. Dissociation is the state in which, on some level or another,

one becomes somewhat removed from " reality, " whether this be

daydreaming, performing actions without being fully connected to their

performance ( " running on automatic " ), or other, more disconnected

actions. It is the opposite of " association " and involves the lack of

association, usually of one's identity, with the rest of the world.

There is no " pure " BPD; it coexists with other illnesses. These are the

most common that BPD may coexist with:

Post traumatic stress disorder

Mood disorders

Panic/anxiety disorders

Substance abuse: 54% of BPs also have a problem

with substance abuse

Gender identity disorder

Attention deficit disorder

Eating disorders

Dissociative disorder (formerly multiple personality

disorder)

Obsessive-compulsive disorder

Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD)

A site I found to be very useful, because of my mother's and hubby's

BPD/NPD combo, was Sam Vaknin's site. Sam Vaknin is a self-proclaimed

malignant narcissist who has written extensively about NPD. NPDs use

other people as a source of " N-Supply " (ie, Narcissistic Supply). For

those who would like more info about NPD, go to (then scroll way way

down):

http://www.geocities.com/vaksam/faq1.html

And, Sam Vaknin's NPD archives excerpts are at (then scroll down):

http://www.geocities.com/vaksam/archive01.html

And, I've included, below, the URL of Sam Vaknin's FAQ #82 titled " BPD,

NPD and other Cluster B PDs " . In this FAQ, Sam Vaknin deals briefly with

the affinity between NPD and BPD (blurred differential diagnoses,

co-morbidity, etc).

http://samvak.tripod.com/faq82.html

_______________

2 - EMAIL SUPPORT GROUPS:

Our most active NonBP email support group is the WelcomeToOz list. There

are over 1,200 people on that list and they generate around 125

posts/day. To join our WelcomeToOz list go to:

http://www.yahoogroups.com/group/WelcomeToOz

To join a list that's not quite that active, there's our NonBP-main

list. To join NonBP-main, go to:

http://www.yahoogroups.com/group/NonBP-main

And, we have lots of other specialty lists, including:

WTOdivorcing

WTOstaying

WTOparenting (for those co-parenting with a BP)

WTOparentsOfBPs

WTOgrandparents

WTOsibling

ModOasis (for the NonBP adult offspring of BP parents)

There are over two dozen email support groups altogether in the

WelcomeToOz Family of lists. The WelcomeToOz lists are for NonBPs. We

have special rules for BPs who want to post. Those rules appear in the

Guidelines posted to all the WelcomeToOz lists on the 1st day of each

month. For more info about our lists, go to:

http://www.bpdcentral.com/support/email.shtml

BPs looking for an online email support group can go to:

http://dir.groups.yahoo.com/dir/1600233766

and <press> 'Borderline Personality Disorder'

AshRisen (also known as " On The Border " ) is a Borderline Recovery

Support area - open to people with BPD who are willing to stay focused

on living healthier and happier lives. If your BP wishes to join, the

URL is:

http://pub69.ezboard.com/bashrisen40890

_____________

3 - THERAPY

There is an article by Randi on " How to choose a BPD therapist " in the

BPD Central Library at:

http://www.bpdcentral.com/resources/therapist/main.shtml

The basic 'text' used on the WelcomeToOz email support groups for NonBPs

is " Stop Walking On Eggshells " (SWOE) by Randi Kreger along with

Mason, psychologist. The table of contents and ordering info for SWOE

are available at:

http://www.bpdcentral.com/books/swoe.shtml

In Appendix A (p 235-240) of SWOE there is info about:

- Causes and Treatment of BPD

- Medication

- Therapy, and

- Outcomes

Not all therapists are knowledgable about or have been specially trained

to treat people with BPD and their NonBP family members. There are

different therapies that do work. Questions that that can be asked when

looking for a BPD-knowledgable/trained DBT therapist are listed on pages

238-239 of " Stop Walking On Eggshells " (SWOE) by Mason and Randi

Kreger. NonBPs can start with their local phone book. Call three

therapists and choose the one you feel the most comfortable with. Or ask

them for a referral. Or, call three more.

Dialectic Behavioral Therapy (DBT) is a type of cognitive-behavioral

therapy developed by Marsha Linehan, Ph.D. at the University of

Washington that has been successfully used to treat people who have BPD.

For an overview of DBT (Dialectic Behavioral Therapy) go to:

http://www.priory.co.uk/dbt1.htm

For more info about DBT go to:

http://www.behavioraltech.com/basics.html

And, for even more info about DBT, go to:

http://www.tricycle.com/currentissue/on_the_borderline.html

To locate a DBT-trained therapist in your area through BRTC (Behavioral

Research and Therapy Clinics), call the phone number listed on the

following website:

http://www.brtc.psych.washington.edu

Also, the BTTG (Behavioral Technology Transfer Group) in Seattle, WA has

a list of clinicians, both nationally and internationally, who have

completed DBT training with their company. You can send an email request

for referral to a DBT-trained therapist in your area to:

DBTinfo@...

For info on a treatment study at Cornell University, go to:

http://www.borderlinedisorders.com/colleagues/studies.htm

NAMI (National Alliance for the Mentally Ill) maintains a list of

therapists who treat BPD; their hotline number is 800-950-NAMI.

_____________

4 - BOOKS and BOOKLETS:

As I wrote above, the text here is SWOE. BPD Central and the websites

are all owned by Randi and books bought through the website help support

the website and these lists. The table of contents and ordering info for

SWOE are available at:

http://www.bpdcentral.com/books/swoe.shtml

Books & CDs for NonBPs:

There are lots of self-help books for NonBPs listed on the BPD Central

website at:

http://www.bpdcentral.com/books/more_books.shtml

" I'm Not Supposed to Be Here: My Recovery from BPD " by

Reiland. This new book is the true story of someone with BPD who

recovered from BPD. For more info about this book, go to:

http://www.bpdcentral.com/

and <click> on " Featured Book " in the upper right hand corner.

" Understanding The Borderline Mother " by Ann Lawson. This book

can be ordered through www.amazon.com or www.half.com

A book by Jeffery Leving et al. titled " Father's Rights " , and there's

the " Wisconsin Father’s Guide to Divorce and Custody " by Novak,

at:

http://www.bpdcentral.com/books/more_books.shtml#fathersrights

Plus there are specialized Eggshell booklets, including:

" Love and Loathing: Protecting Your Mental Health and Legal Rights When

Your Partner has Borderline Personality Disorder " . More info about Love

and Loathing is at:

http://www.bpdcentral.com/books/loathing.shtml

" Hope for Parents: Helping Your Borderline Son or Daughter Without

Sacrificing Your Family Or Yourself " . Hope for Parents is for the

parents of children (of any age) who may have BPD, and info is available

at:

http://www.bpdcentral.com/books/hope.shtml

" You're My World: A Non-BP's Guide to Custody " is a set of 3 Custody

CDs, at:

http://www.bpdcentral.com/cds/youremyworld.shtml

Books for BPs include:

~ " LOST IN THE MIRROR: An Inside Look at Borderline Personality

Disorder " by A. Moskowitz, MD. This is a self-help book for

those with BPD.

http://www.bpdcentral.com/books/more_books.shtml#lostinmirror

~ " ECLIPSES: Behind the borderline personality disorder: DBT therapy

from the patient's viewpoint " .

This book has been written especially for borderlines. The author, who

has been treated for borderline personality disorder, offers hope and

compassion to fellow borderlines and presents an introduction to

Dialectical Behavior Therapy in layperson's terms.

http://www.msano.com/eclipses.html

~ " THE ANGRY HEART: Overcoming Borderline and Addictive Disorders " , book

by ph Santoro, Cohen, ph Santoro PhD. ISBN: 1572240806.

This is an interactive self-help guide written primarily for BPs who

come from dysfunctional backgrounds, although it is also very helpful

for those who did not. You can e-mail or call the authors, read

excerpts, and find out about the author's treatment program at

http://www.slshealth.com

__________

5 - LIVE CHAT and REGIONAL SUPPORT GROUPS

Live Chat

A chatroom is available just for NonBP members of WelcomeToOz at

#Tinman'sPub on a Dalnet server on IRC. Instructions for joining are at:

http://tinmanspub.paxhaven.net/

If you're totally unfamiliar with IRC, you can go to

http://www.dalnet.com

and join the chat using their web-based java chat server. When the

window opens, type in " /join #Tinman'sPub " without the quotes, and press

<return>.

More info about the TinMansPub is in the Guidelines which are posted

to all the WelcomeToOz lists on the 1st day of each month.

Regional Support Groups

Helen, who maintains a full list of resources about BPD at

http://home.hvc.rr.com/helenbpd/

has a message board where NonBPs can register their interest in

creating/joining a real life regional support group. You

can check it out at:

http://www.voy.com/79827/

__________

Cheers,

- Edith

One of the moderators / WelcomeToOz Family of NonBP lists.

..