Re: help with questions. Cassy

[Guest guest]

Cassy:

I am so sorry that you are having to deal with the

alcoholic hubby and MIL nastiness problems. Having RA

with it's constant pain and fatigue is hard enough to

handle without having extra added stress from them. I

would say definately seek legal advice, and, if you

can, kick the hubby out - have him live with mommy

again, or get out yourself with your kids. If you are

paying all the bills and are the primary income, then

you don't really need him and all of his problems

adding more stress to your life. When you are able to

get him out, or you get out, get a restraining order

as well. Keep yourself and your kids safe.

The way you describe your life is no way to live. I

have alcoholics in my family too, and I know what you

are going through - they can be very scary when they

are drunk and out of control. You and the kids don't

need that. He also sounds a bit like a momma's boy

which is also not good. What in the world would he do

to support the house and kids without your paycheck?

It does not sound like he could make a very stable

life on his own. No judge will give children to an

alcoholic father who is sometimes violent when there

is a loving and caring mother in the picture.

Sounds like you are taking about the average amount of

meds for RA and it's associated problems, so you

certainly are not on " dope " or over-medicating

yourself.

Please seek legal counsel on this issue with your

hubby/MIL, the sooner the better. Please take care of

yourself and your children first - they don't need to

grow up in a family where they are scared of their

father. Best of luck - hang in there -

let us know what you do -

Kathe in CA

--- cnberte <bertelson@...> wrote:

> I do not post much but I read and learn alot. I

> need some help. I

> am 36 year old, mother of two,(12 and 15).

>

> I was recently diagnosed with RA (May 2005) and I am

> seeing a

> rheumatologist. Of course I am taking many meds and

> my labs are

> becoming stable. I am still in a lot of pain, but

> we are working it

> out.

>

> My problem is that husband and in laws make my life

> unbearable. He

> is constantly second guessing my meds and seeking

> her opinion (MIL)

> on what I should or should not take or more

> importantly that I take

> too much. He actually said that I am on dope. I

> said you make it

> sound like I am smoking pot and he said " you would

> be better off if

> you were " . My MIL actually told me during christmas

> that it was the

> paranoia talking that was making me upset with her.

>

>

> Should I be concerned that he and my inlaws are

> trying to make me

> look incompetant so that he can kick me out of my

> house and keep the

> kids. Should I seek legal advise. I work full

> time, I am the

> primary income and I pay ALL the bills. He and his

> mother have been

> made this horrible disease so much worse by their

> behaviour. We have

> not been getting along for quite some time, but I

> feel that I am

> being set up. I have not found any information on

> my meds causing

> the type of symptoms he descibed.

>

> Any advise? I am concerned. I have told both of

> them if they have

> concerns about the meds I take they can go with me

> to rheumy appt and

> discuss with her.

>

> I take MTX (injectable), folic acid, plaquenil,

> sometimes prednisone,

> vicodin for pain tramadol for pain when I dont have

> vicoden, advair,

> provigil for fatigue and nausea, and now lunesta for

> help with sleep

> (it was ambien, but it quit working)

>

> And one other thing, he is an alcoholic, who is

> prone to anger when

> drinking hard alcohol. He usually starts in about

> my meds when I ask

> him not to drink so much because he is scaring me or

> the kids.

>

> Any help will be appreciated. Cassy

>

>

>

>

>

>

>

>

Kathe in CA

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