CASSY

[Guest guest]

Hey there! How are you feeling today? Were you able to get any sleep

yet? I'm sorry that you are not feeling right. I have those days

too. I also have had a lot of difficulty sleeping lately. I have been

offline for a couple of days. I'm on Shirleys computer trying to get

caught up a bit. I just wanted you to know that I am thinking about

you and wishing you a good day! I will be praying for you as well.

Hang in thee and keep posting! We all love you here and send cyber

hugs and well wishes your way! Take care and stay in touch! XXX's Kim

[Guest guest]

My heart goes out to you. We don't give because we EXPECT anything in return,

but it's

hard not to be hurt when you get NOTHING in your time of need after putting

yourself out

there for others all the time. Your outlook is so healthy and accepting. Maybe

you can

focus now on developing a family outside of your husband and his........with

your children,

neighbors, friends, etc. Make your own extended family instead of relying on

the one you

married into. " Family " is so different now than it used to be because the world

has

changed so much - people not staying where they were raised, divorces,

neighborhoods in which people don't know one another, etc. If you don't have

the family

you want, MAKE ONE that works for you over the next few years. It can be done.

Reaching

out into the community and getting involved in things - you can find " family " in

the most

unlikely of places.

wendy

>

> Well, my theory with me is that either way it will be ok. I am

> grieving for the loss of my best friend (my husband), who hasn't

> really been a friend to me in a long time and when the chips were

> down, he was NOT there for me. It was like a light went off in my

> head this evening. I AM A good catch. I am just sorry that he is

> missing out on all I have to offer and the love and companionship

> that would could be giving to each other. I am loving, loyal and

> generous and after this time I guess pretty gullible too. Oh well

> the important thing is that my kids know and God knows. He will

> either come around or he won't. Either way I am ok with it. His

> loss and as for his mother, well someday, when she is very old and

> dependant on her children that they do not treat her with the lack of

> ompassion that she has shown to me. She has more to offer strangers

> than me, her DIL for 18 years. This time I don't know if I can do

> it. I did with his grandma, grandpa, cousins, etc and anyone else in

> the family who has needed me, but I just don't think that this one is

> going away. The wound is too deep this time. I have been a good and

> faithful daughter in law and it is a shame that the gossip train has

> to keep on going so much so that relationships are destroyed. The

> desire to be a part of " the family " is gone. Like something inside

> of me has died. I honestly think it did and today I realized it and

> that it is OK. I am letting go and letting God, because I have to!

> I have to help ME get well. Thanks for listening. Cassy