Re: kinda long, thanks for being here for me.

[Guest guest]

Thanks for sharing your story - it hit home with me.

Alcoholism also has been a part of my childhood and

adulthood, both of my brothers are alcoholics/addicts,

and my father also drank. My dad and I have a so-so

relationship - he has since remarried, and lives only

about two hours away, but we don't see him much at

all.

My youngest brother, now 49, is recovering for many

years, and is in nursing school, and he and I have

become very close since the death of our mother 9

years ago. It was not overnight, but he has become

such a blessing to me. We keep our mom's memories

alive together, and I am thankful that we now have

this kind of relationship.

My other brother would be 50 now if he is still alive,

I don't know, we lost track of him at our mom's

memorial service. He arrived from jail, in handcuffs

and ankle cuffs, with deputies in tow, for the

memorial service, because he was serving violation of

probation time when she died. He has been in and out

of jail since he was a teenager, because of his

alcoholism. He lives on the streets. I have also

checked obituaries and news stories of john doe

bodies, thinking that it might be him. I don't know

if I will ever see him again.

Your sister and you have a chance now to form a

relationship, how lucky you are. I amd sure that this

will help both of you so much in coming to terms with

your dad's alcoholism, and so much more of your family

history. It's amazing how things come about in our

lives when we most need it - your sister and you need

each other more than ever with this shared dx - and

you will both no doubt benefit so much from each

other.

Meds that we have today are getting more advanced and

more effective all the time, and I pray that you both

find the treatment you need to fight your RA. My

grandmother was crippled by RA, but I know that I will

not be, because of the meds we have available now.

There is so much hope - don't give up! I will be

keeping you and your sister in my prayers.

Kathe in CA

--- cnberte <bertelson@...> wrote:

> I will try to make it as short as possible. I did

> not live with my

> parents growing up, which is a long story. I have

> two half sisters

> and one brother of whom I have very little

> communication. My moms

> daughter and my brother have chosen to live their

> lives in a way

> that I do not agree so we do not talk, we don't have

> anything in

> common and my brother always calls when he needs

> money (he is older

> than me and I have not spoken to him in 12 years)

> Anyway, I always

> look up info about them on the internet, morbidly I

> always check to

> obits for my brother. Well, I have a myspace

> account, so I just

> happened to put his name in there and there he was.

> I didn't

> contact him but my half sister was on his " friends "

> list. I have

> spoken with a handful of times over our lives, but I

> sent her a

> message telling her that I thought I was her sister

> and she sent me

> a message that yes in fact I was correct that she is

> my sister and

> she could not remember my married name. She was

> very surprised to

> read that I had RA on my site. She is also

> suffering from severe

> undiagnosed joint pain and has been for quite some

> time, and also

> that our father had severe Ra, not sure how but she

> said it was

> diagnosed with DNA and that had he lived he would

> have been in a

> wheelchair in a year, he died when he was 40, all of

> this time I had

> been under the impression that he died of cirrhosis,

> he was an

> alcoholic.

>

> Now to how I am feeling, I first of all, feel relief

> that I am not

> the only one here and that my sister will no longer

> have to go

> through this alone, I can be there for her. She has

> been struggling

> with this. She is 25 years old, I am 36. Our

> father died 23 days

> before she was born. Second, understanding for my

> dad, if he was in

> half the pain I am in and not getting the help he

> needed maybe

> alcohol worked best for him,(NOT JUSTIFYING

> ALCOHOLISM) ( I have

> always struggled with how a person could drink

> enough to give

> themselves cirrhosis at 40 without some other

> underlying liver

> disease). This was over 25 years ago and the

> treatments are 100%

> better now. Third I am feeling intense fear. If all

> of us have RA

> so severely at such a young age, what is my life to

> be like and what

> have I passed on to my children. My daughter

> already shows signs of

> early RA, I had her tested last year, it was

> negative. I thought

> this may be sympathy symptoms however it has not

> gone away. My sed

> rate has never, ever been elevated. My Rheumatoid

> factor is 546

> iu/ml normal is 0-15, my cylic citrullintated

> peptide (CCP) is 25

> normal is less than 5 and my C reactive protein is

> 1.41, normal is

> less than .50. I have flares where my all of the

> systems get

> involved, shortness of breath, chest pain (bilat),

> aching in the

> eyes, exquisite pain in my joints. just

> unbelievable. I honestly do

> not know how I am going to live to be a ripe old

> age.

>

> I have an appt with my rheumy September 6, where I

> can share all of

> my new information. When I was first Dx'ed with RA,

> my rheumy was

> great but she moved back to Poland and I got

> assigned to another, I

> did not take an instant liking to my new one, but I

> am giving her

> the benefit of making a possible poor first

> impression and next time

> will be better. However I have began to speak with

> another office

> for a second opinion and if this next appointment

> does not go well,

> I will have a plan in place to move forward. My

> needs are not being

> met. If my labs are ok and my symptoms are still

> horrible,

> something is not right. I was dx'ed in May 05. I

> have no comfort in

> just being able to call the office when I need

> something, I am on

> MTX ,1 cc injection per week, plaquinil 400mg per

> day, folic acid,

> lunesta, advair, diclofenac and lots of hydrodone.

> So, I think I

> should be feeling a lot better than I am.

>

> Anyway, I know this is a lot but thanks for

> listening. I mostly

> read with an occasional comment when warrented. We

> all have our

> role that fits us best. Thanks for being there.

>

>

>

>

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