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hello again.. I hope someone can talk to me.. i hate whining also but

having trouble coping. after all the surgeries over the yrs i was

hoping for many without, but it just keeps going and im getting to

tired mentally and physically to deal with everything. i told ya last

week im scheduled for arm surgery the end of the month, now i cant

even hardly eat. i know part of my med. problems included with the

mixed connective disease is degenerative arthritis.10 yrs ago when i

was 33 i was told my bone in my jaw had been wearing away and that i

would prob be a candidate for jaw replacement?? well my jaw went with

this major whole body flare ive been going thru for a month. got the

bad news that there is nothing else they can do for me but some kind

of surgery. It hurts so bad but here im having to go for my other

surgery. As everyone tells me its just another page in the book of

debbie, but they all think i get through it but sometimes i just want

to give up cause now i know there is more ahead.i may show tough on

the outside but im scared on the inside. i think this is the first

time i actually really sat and cried.My daughter is in college and my

other one doesnt live at home.. im seperated 5 yrs now. i do date but

find when i start getting close to someone i back off cause of all my

problems. havnt found one to even discuss it with. This seems to be

the only place i can talk about it. I only work part time and its for

a place that does know my limits in a way. I just want a big hug..

love and hugs to ya all... debbie

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