OT- for a few laughs

[Guest guest]

An old man, a boy and a donkey were going to town. The boy rode on

the donkey and the old man walked. As they went along they passed

some people who remarked it was a shame the old man was walking and

the boy was riding.

The man and boy thought maybe the critics were right, so they changed

positions. Later, they passed some people that remarked, " What a

shame, he makes that little boy walk. "

They then decided they both would walk! Soon they passed some more

people who thought they were stupid to walk when they had a decent

donkey to ride. So, they both rode the donkey.

Now they passed some people that shamed them by saying how awful to

put such a load on a poor donkey. The boy and man said they were

probably right, so they decided to carry the donkey.

As they crossed the bridge, they lost their grip on the animal and it

fell into the river and drowned.

The moral of the story: " If you try to please everyone, you might as

well kiss your ass good-bye. "

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Well... they aren't really new, cause this is an old email... but

still kinda funny so here they are.........

New Medications for Women

D A M I T O L

Take 2 and the rest of the world can go to hell for up to 8 hours.

ST. M A M A' S W O R T

Plant extract that treats mom's depression by rendering pre-schoolers

unconscious for up to six hours.

E M P T Y N E S T R O G E N

Highly effective suppository that eliminates melancholy by enhancing

the memory of how awful the kids are as teenagers, and how you can't

wait until they moved out.

P E P T O B I M B O

Liquid silicone for single women. Two full cups swallowed before an

evening out increases breast size, decreases intelligence and greatly

improves flirting.

D U M E R O L

When taken with Peptobimbo, can cause dangerously low I.Q. causing

enjoyment of country and western music.

F L I P I T O R

Increases life expectancy of commuters by controlling road rage and

the urge to flip off other drivers.

M E N I C I L L I N

Potent antibiotic for older women. Increases resistance to such lines

as, " You make me want to be a better person ... can we get naked now? "

B U Y A G R A

Injectable stimulant taken prior to shopping. Increases potency and

duration of spending spree.

B U Y I T T O L

When combined with Buyagra, can cause an indiscriminate buying frenzy

so severe the victim may even come home with a Donnie Osmond CD or a

book by Dr. .

J A C K A S S P I R I N

Relieves headaches caused by a man who can't remember shit. (i.e.-

your birthday, anniversary, phone number, etc.)

A N T I -T A L K S I D E N T

A spray carried in a purse or pocket to be used on anyone too eager

to share their life stories with total strangers.

S E X C E D R I N

More effective than Excedrin in treating the, " Not now, I have a

headache, " syndrome.

R A G A M E T

When administered to a husband, provides the same irritation as

ragging on him all weekend, saving the wife the time and trouble of

doing it herself.