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Thanks, Randi, for a very touching post!

SmileS!

Carol

RandiBPD@... wrote:

>

> In a message dated 8/24/2002 11:12:42 AM Central Daylight Time,

> ModOasis writes:

>

> > I think I am going to celebrate my birthday by going to every 12-step group

> > I

> > can and working to get myself organized so I can make some quick decisions.

> >

> > I hate feeling this financial panic, and I am kicking myself because of

> > some

> > recent decisions that I made under duress that have worked against me.

> > Does

> > it ever get any better???!!!

> >

>

> Yes, it gets better. Sometimes it needs to get worse before it gets better,

> but it does get better. The first thing I would suggest is not comparing

> yourself to other people. I have a friend who has a wonderful family and I

> compared her life to mine for years until I realized that it wasn't helping

> me or anyone else.

>

> I firmly believe in creating your own family. It may happen slowly but it

> will happen. I am treying to do this by joining a unitarian church and

> singing with their choir. I was kind of inspired by the Reiland book,

> the story of a woman who recovered from BPD (I'm not Supposed to Be Here.)

> She has an emotional high point where she really realizes how the people in

> her church's chior helped her make it through when things got very black. So

> I decided to steal the idea.

>

> There will be times when all seems dark. But it just takes one comforting

> touch...virtual or real life.....to make you feel better. The reality of it

> is that people who grew up in perfect families will never truly appreciate

> them because they don't know any other way. I think of that when I read about

> the starving poor in other countries, or even right here in America. I will

> never fully appreciate what it is to eat when I aam hungry, sleep in a soft

> bed, entertain myself at a moment's notice, and do all of the things some

> people in the world would give their eyeteeth for.

>

> I felt bad recently because I was frustrated thata I couldn't contribute very

> much financially to my marriage. But my husband had a job so we were OK. Then

> my husband got laid off and I realized how lucky I had been that he had a

> job--something I took for granted. Then I had to have a strange skin growth

> removed and I realized that it could have been much worse--skin cancer or

> something--and I realized how lucky I was when money and jobs was our only

> problem. It kept changing... the more I lost the more I really appreciated

> what I had and hopefully will have again. When you create your new family you

> will cherish it and appreciate what you have because you've been without it.

> You just have to get out there, act like yourself and be open to meeting new

> people (even people you may not have considered at one point.) And of course

> you have friends here already. So yes, it does get better.

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Thank you Randi and everyone here. I made it through and I had a nice time.

My friend showed up (I always worry things won't work out, brace myself for

disappointment) and the concert was great. My mother did not call me, the

first time in my whole life. My BPD sister did not call me, nor did I get a

card from my nephews. Not that I was expecting it. I guess a part of me

still hasn't given up hope and still has not accepted that I won't be seeing

them anymore. I keep hoping that a miracle will happen, but I know it is

magical thinking and that it is a trap. I got flowers from my Aunt.

In some ways not having nada and BP sister acknowledge my birthday has

further liberated me. Maybe in the long run they did me a favor. I really

don't have anything to be guilty about. I just didn't take the bait this

time. I kind of feel sorry for them in a way, how sad that they do not want

me to be happy, free and safe.

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  • 11 months later...

Ilse,

Thanks so much for the kind wishes. Perhaps we too will meet someday as I am

now planning a trip to Australia and New Zealand. As long as I keep the

focus, it will happen. Would be wonderful to give you a hug in person. Thanks

for all you have shared with the group in your continuing quest to find wellness

for all. My love goes out to you and all those loved ones in your life.

Take care and stay well.

Love and Prayers,

Betty

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  • 1 year later...

Thank you. :-D

I don't post often, ok I never post, but I still lurk. ;-)

An interesting situation occured last week. As I gain more spiritual

tools to deal with life, I stopped doing my affirmations for whatever

the reason. More frequently my work place became more frustrating with

the people I work with. Lots of blaming, finger pointing, and yelling.

I thought about quiting but in all honesty I love the job and deep

down I didn't want to run away.

I meditated on the subject and realized I did have the power to change

this for the better. I had affirmations! Affirmations are my spiritual

and psychological foundation and I had gotten away from them.

Did five affirmations to change my work place every day I went to work

(only work 2 1/2 days a week) and did two affirmations for when I

wasn't at work. Things have smoothed out, and my work place is fun again.

So let this be a reminder...do your affirmations!

Lots of hugs, blessings, and joy to all of you.

~ Kassandra

Who will be celebrating, having fun and enjoy my day...as I do every day.

>

> Happy birthday to all the January people.

> Celebrate, have fun, and enjoy your special day.

>

> Magickal Blessings,

> Fyre

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Kassandra,

Happy Birthday! And it is so good to hear from you again! I wasn't sure

if you were still around, or if you'd forgotten us around here! Thanks for

sharing your story!

You know, what you told us has happened to me a million times, and I

imagine to most people in affirmations. A person learns this wonderful new tool

called " affirmations " and it can open so many doors and make so many changes in

a person's life. Then, a person can get complacent, or lazy, or just plain

forget that those miracles, changes, and new life WERE BECAUSE of doing the

affirmations. Then a person is right back to where they started. Having to

re-learn all over again the basics, and what helped the person in the first

place!!

The reason I know this, is because it has happened to me many, many

times. Kassandra, thanks again for the friendly reminder! I needed to hear it

right now. Take Care, and visit us more often. Love & Hugs, PJ

Kassandra Calhoun wrote:

Thank you. :-D

I don't post often, ok I never post, but I still lurk. ;-)

An interesting situation occured last week. As I gain more spiritual

tools to deal with life, I stopped doing my affirmations for whatever

the reason. More frequently my work place became more frustrating with

the people I work with. Lots of blaming, finger pointing, and yelling.

I thought about quiting but in all honesty I love the job and deep

down I didn't want to run away.

I meditated on the subject and realized I did have the power to change

this for the better. I had affirmations! Affirmations are my spiritual

and psychological foundation and I had gotten away from them.

Did five affirmations to change my work place every day I went to work

(only work 2 1/2 days a week) and did two affirmations for when I

wasn't at work. Things have smoothed out, and my work place is fun again.

So let this be a reminder...do your affirmations!

Lots of hugs, blessings, and joy to all of you.

~ Kassandra

Who will be celebrating, having fun and enjoy my day...as I do every day.

>

> Happy birthday to all the January people.

> Celebrate, have fun, and enjoy your special day.

>

> Magickal Blessings,

> Fyre

---------------------------------

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  • 2 years later...

Dear Ashok

Many Happy returns of the day. May Lord Ganesha bring success in every

field.

OPGupta

>

>Reply-To: mgims

>To: mgims

>Subject: Re: The price..of listening to music...

>Date: Sat, 8 Sep 2007 08:49:28 -0700 (PDT)

>

>Shyam,

> Car is the best place to enjoy music in my experience....(and only when

>you are alone). So the best investment is an excellent car stereo. I don't

>know much about these gadgets, as Ashok takes care of all that.

>

> Renuka '84

>

>

>

> Renuka

>

> Renuka

>

>shyamkamath wrote:

> .....in total privacy...does not come cheap, my dear

>friends..!!!.

>And this is what, I just discovered,yesterday....

>

>Hello everybody,

>I have seen,many of my friends...with or without an ear, for (any)

>music.,..end up buying the best in Audio systems..out here...in the Gulf..

>

> " LENA HAI TO BEST HI. " ..is the motto, of some of them...

>Although,I would very much agree with Mr.W.Buffet's theory..of not going in

>for.... Branded stuff,always and feel comfortable with what..one likes...

>

>Infact,I have always maintained..that..,.when one purchased..a state of the

>art...Hi-Fi..systems..like THE BOSE...acoustimass,..for

>example...EITHER...the family should be a music lover, as well...or the

>WIFE and THE NEIGHBOURS, SHOULD BE DEAF...or else...she/they will never

>allow her hubby to listen in such Loud Volume,which is why,...such

>TOYS,..for Grown UP..MEN..was conceived.,in first place.

>..

>But,seeing the plight of so many men...The same company..devised..another

>magnificent..device..

>

> " Head phones. "

>.

>And NOT JUST ANY ORDINARY ONE,friends..It is called THE SOUND

>CANCELLATION...Head Phones...and believe me,one has to hear it to believe

>it..

>And I, just did that yesterday,...

>The technician...started explaining the features..of the head phones...and

>as I put them on..for a moment,instantly,it appeared as if ,I have pressed

>the Mute button,of that technician...as, I could hear no word....just lip

>movements...!!!

>And then,when he switched on..the music....IT WAS LIKE...

>

>US BHEED MEIN..SIRF..MAIN..AUR BUS MAIN....HI..WOH MUSIC..KA ANAND LE RAHA

>THA...

>Not a decibel of sound ,from the exterior could be heard...

>Simply fantastic..technology,

>The price,yes...(please..be seated)...is..22,000Rs..for the HEAD

>PHONES..ONLY...!!!.

>Some people they say,go all the way....

>

>Shyam(84)

>

>

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  • 4 months later...

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