Kere - prayer vs. control, etc.

[Guest guest]

Hi Kere:

Thanks for your message. This is where I'm struggling now -- I'm a

member of AA and they say: " Let go and Let God " -- but it's so

difficult to " let go " when you're even THINKING of nada -- who

perfected the hoover!!

OMG!! It's like trying to ignore the fact that a vacuum cleaner is

turned on and making that sucking noise !!!!

BOY did she perfect hoovering!!!!

I feel like I have to call in the exorcist!!

I ALSO feel extremely fortunate to have a CHANCE at life to take a

different road than Nada did!!

I feel like there's a " classic " novel about to be written involving

all the members of this group -- with symbolic twists of fate, and

heorines and the whole works!!

I feel dizzy with the thoughts and feelings and images coming forth

from my soul and the souls of the rest of this group!! I feel like a

classic is being born!! Like another " big boom " is about to happen!

We're all being reborn!! This is a wonderful miracle for all of us!

Barb

> > Nada had hurt my feelings so bad, and batted me down so many

times,

> > that by the time I was around 13 years old I couldn't stand to

hear

> > her voice!!

> >

> > At one point, when I was around 14 or 15 years old, Nada started

> > reading my books that I had taken out of the library. Sometimes

> > (JUST as I was leaving the house to go to a friend's house) she

> would

> > ask me if I wanted to talk about a certain book!

> >

> > What a wonderful thing it might have been to talk to my own

mother

> > about a book!!

> >

> > But by that time she had poisioned me so badly against her, like

I

> > said I couldn't stand the sight of her.

> >

> > Now -- well -- as everyone says " everything's about Nada " --

> >

> > so, it never happened again -- she never even cared beyond a few

> > minutes of my life -- what my opinion was about a book or

anything

> > else for that matter.

> >

> > How very, very sad!! I just hate the whole thing! It's so

> painful!!

> >

> > I just love my son so much!

> >

> > Does she have ANY idea what she's missing?

> >

> > When she sees a movie about a wonderful mother/daughter

> relationship,

> > does she feel sad?

> >

> > Her constant verbal abuse and " nutty act " keep chasing me away --

> > chasing even the THOUGHT of her away!!

> >

> > Argh!!

> >

> > Barb