Guest guest Posted May 13, 2011 Report Share Posted May 13, 2011 I can totally relate to that. Constant criticism was a normal part of my childhood! Maybe that's why recommends the success journal so much. And that reminds me that I haven't written in it for months now. Thanks, Colleen! > > Today's column was a good reminder that part of how I think & treat > myself is based on how I was traised / treated and how it's never too > late to change those patterns in yourself as well as those around you. > What is right vs. what is wrong! > > > Winner's Circle Network with Lou Tice - 5/12/11 - " Focus on the > Positive " > > Positive thinking is certainly a powerful thing, but positive > expression is equally important. Many people, especially marriage > partners and parents of small children, seem to believe that the best > way to get somebody to change for the better is to consistently point > out to them what they are doing wrong. > > These authority figures criticize, day in and day out. Eventually the > people they are talking to become frustrated and often start to feel > angry, because they see that nothing they say or do has any positive > effect, and sometimes things even get worse. > > Has this ever happened to you? If so, there's a principle of cognitive > psychology that I teach in my seminars you'll want to know about. It's > simply this: We move toward and become like what we think about. And we > automatically behave in ways that match the image we have of our > capabilities and ourselves. > > When you focus on what is going wrong, you tend to experience more of > the problem. And when you focus on the solution, you move toward it, as > surely as day follows night. > > So instead of telling folks what they are doing wrong, why not tell > them what they are doing right? Instead of telling them what the > problem is, why not tell them what the solution looks like and how it > will benefit them personally? > > And while you're at it, why not tell them how much you enjoy and > appreciate the thoughtful or bright or funny things they say and do. > Remember the behavior that you focus on and praise tends to be > repeated. > > > > Lou Tice - The Pacific Institute - www.thepacificinstitute.com > <http://www.thepacificinstitute.com/> > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted May 13, 2011 Report Share Posted May 13, 2011 Thanks for this!! Realllllly needed it! Sent on the Sprint® Now Network from my BlackBerry® Focus on the Positive Today's column was a good reminder that part of how I think & treat myself is based on how I was traised / treated and how it's never too late to change those patterns in yourself as well as those around you. What is right vs. what is wrong! Winner's Circle Network with Lou Tice - 5/12/11 - " Focus on the Positive " Positive thinking is certainly a powerful thing, but positive expression is equally important. Many people, especially marriage partners and parents of small children, seem to believe that the best way to get somebody to change for the better is to consistently point out to them what they are doing wrong. These authority figures criticize, day in and day out. Eventually the people they are talking to become frustrated and often start to feel angry, because they see that nothing they say or do has any positive effect, and sometimes things even get worse. Has this ever happened to you? If so, there's a principle of cognitive psychology that I teach in my seminars you'll want to know about. It's simply this: We move toward and become like what we think about. And we automatically behave in ways that match the image we have of our capabilities and ourselves. When you focus on what is going wrong, you tend to experience more of the problem. And when you focus on the solution, you move toward it, as surely as day follows night. So instead of telling folks what they are doing wrong, why not tell them what they are doing right? Instead of telling them what the problem is, why not tell them what the solution looks like and how it will benefit them personally? And while you're at it, why not tell them how much you enjoy and appreciate the thoughtful or bright or funny things they say and do. Remember the behavior that you focus on and praise tends to be repeated. Lou Tice - The Pacific Institute - www.thepacificinstitute.com <http://www.thepacificinstitute.com/> Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted May 13, 2011 Report Share Posted May 13, 2011 Colleen thanks so much for posting this! It is so true!! Thanks for this!! Realllllly needed it! Sent on the Sprint® Now Network from my BlackBerry® Focus on the Positive Today's column was a good reminder that part of how I think & treat myself is based on how I was traised / treated and how it's never too late to change those patterns in yourself as well as those around you. What is right vs. what is wrong! Winner's Circle Network with Lou Tice - 5/12/11 - " Focus on the Positive " Positive thinking is certainly a powerful thing, but positive expression is equally important. Many people, especially marriage partners and parents of small children, seem to believe that the best way to get somebody to change for the better is to consistently point out to them what they are doing wrong. These authority figures criticize, day in and day out. Eventually the people they are talking to become frustrated and often start to feel angry, because they see that nothing they say or do has any positive effect, and sometimes things even get worse. Has this ever happened to you? If so, there's a principle of cognitive psychology that I teach in my seminars you'll want to know about. It's simply this: We move toward and become like what we think about. And we automatically behave in ways that match the image we have of our capabilities and ourselves. When you focus on what is going wrong, you tend to experience more of the problem. And when you focus on the solution, you move toward it, as surely as day follows night. So instead of telling folks what they are doing wrong, why not tell them what they are doing right? Instead of telling them what the problem is, why not tell them what the solution looks like and how it will benefit them personally? And while you're at it, why not tell them how much you enjoy and appreciate the thoughtful or bright or funny things they say and do. Remember the behavior that you focus on and praise tends to be repeated. Lou Tice - The Pacific Institute - www.thepacificinstitute.com <http://www.thepacificinstitute.com/> Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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