Guest guest Posted May 14, 2011 Report Share Posted May 14, 2011 had a binge last night.. when i needed to just go to bed (though the calorie counting is still very triggering).. went a whole week without a binge which is the longest time in a while.. so that's good. upset because i was just starting to feel pretty good about myself thanks, Avie -- Avie Linden University of Michigan - Anthropology Program in the Environment, History of Art Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted May 14, 2011 Report Share Posted May 14, 2011 Avie, Focus on the positive (a WHOLE week!) ... one slip (one binge) does not define you - remember, you are the originator for any changes that you want to happen. don't think that you are stuck in a repetitive cycle where there is no escape - our behaviors and choices are always ours to make and your past / present does not dictate the future. You can move beyond old limits, make new choices, and take new actions. being aware is how you continue to consciously evolve. you've done it, you can do it again - you have it in you, I know it!  ________________________________ To: insideoutweightloss Sent: Saturday, May 14, 2011 2:22 PM Subject: IOWL  had a binge last night.. when i needed to just go to bed (though the calorie counting is still very triggering).. went a whole week without a binge which is the longest time in a while.. so that's good. upset because i was just starting to feel pretty good about myself thanks, Avie -- Avie Linden University of Michigan - Anthropology Program in the Environment, History of Art Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted May 14, 2011 Report Share Posted May 14, 2011 Avie, The awesome part about IOWL is that you are expected to have slips and not be perfect! I agree with Colleen...one week is HUGE! Having even one DAY is awesome for me. If you go back to the binge, did you check to see if the intensity was less than ones you've had before? did it last a shorter time? It's easy to beat ourselves up about what we've done wrong, but look at it from a mathematical stand point-- 7/8 =successful 1/8= not as successful. I was an English major, but to me that still seems pretty awesome Another thing that has helped me so much is the concept talks about in her podcasts about bringing yourself back to balance. If you realized you had too much to eat, stopping then and there will help in the long run as opposed to binging. All of those stops will all build up! love, angela > > Avie, > > Focus on the positive (a WHOLE week!) ... one slip (one binge) does not define you - remember, you are the originator for any > changes that you want to happen. > > > don't think that you are stuck in a repetitive cycle where there is no escape - our behaviors and choices are always ours to > make and your past / present does not dictate the future. You can move beyond old limits, > make new choices, and take new actions. being aware is how you continue to consciously evolve. > > you've done it, you can do it again - you have it in you, I know it! > >  > > ________________________________ > > To: insideoutweightloss > Sent: Saturday, May 14, 2011 2:22 PM > Subject: IOWL > > >  > had a binge last night.. when i needed to just go to bed (though the > calorie counting is still very triggering).. went a whole week without > a binge which is the longest time in a while.. so that's good. > > upset because i was just starting to feel pretty good about myself > > thanks, > Avie > > -- > Avie Linden > University of Michigan - Anthropology > Program in the Environment, History of Art > > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted May 15, 2011 Report Share Posted May 15, 2011 thanks, Colleen. so nice! I did something interesting last night (something i've never done before)... i made a list of goals for the WEEK.. one of which is to listen to two IOWL episodes thanks, Avie On Sat, May 14, 2011 at 8:13 PM, Colleen wrote: > > > Avie, > > Focus on the positive (a WHOLE week!) ... one slip (one binge) does not > define you - remember, you are the originator for any > changes that you want to happen. > > don't think that you are stuck in a repetitive cycle where there is no > escape - our behaviors and choices are always ours to > make and your past / present does not dictate the future. You can move > beyond old limits, > make new choices, and take new actions. being aware is how you continue to > consciously evolve. > > you've done it, you can do it again - you have it in you, I know it! > > > > ________________________________ > > To: insideoutweightloss > Sent: Saturday, May 14, 2011 2:22 PM > Subject: IOWL > > > > had a binge last night.. when i needed to just go to bed (though the > calorie counting is still very triggering).. went a whole week without > a binge which is the longest time in a while.. so that's good. > > upset because i was just starting to feel pretty good about myself > > thanks, > Avie > > -- > Avie Linden > University of Michigan - Anthropology > Program in the Environment, History of Art > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted June 3, 2011 Report Share Posted June 3, 2011 Please, ramble away. You really struck a chord within me. There is no reason to not love ourselves. I guess that could be stated in the positive, too; there are countless reasons to love ourselves. That's something I'm still trying to do, and I look forward to the day when it comes naturally. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted June 3, 2011 Report Share Posted June 3, 2011 Thanks for this title. Will check it out. Sent on the Sprint® Now Network from my BlackBerry® Re: IOWL  Please, ramble away. You really struck a chord within me. There is no reason to not love ourselves. I guess that could be stated in the positive, too; there are countless reasons to love ourselves. That's something I'm still trying to do, and I look forward to the day when it comes naturally. Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted June 3, 2011 Report Share Posted June 3, 2011 Thanks for the recommendation Jen, that sounds like something that might help me, too. > I just started a book that promises to be very good. It came recommended to me > by my counselor. It is about recognizing those parts of ourselves that are sad, > forgotten, attention getting, childish, ect... that often push our compulsions > forward, and giving them compassionate attention. Much of what I am reading > reminds me of and her approach. > > The book is called " Self Therapy " by Jay Earley > > Jen > > > > > ________________________________ > > To: insideoutweightloss > Sent: Fri, June 3, 2011 8:17:38 AM > Subject: Re: IOWL > > > Please, ramble away. You really struck a chord within me. There is no reason > to not love ourselves. > > I guess that could be stated in the positive, too; there are countless > reasons to love ourselves. > > That's something I'm still trying to do, and I look forward to the day when > it comes naturally. > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted June 3, 2011 Report Share Posted June 3, 2011 Correction, " so easy, " not " do easy. " Haha I am wearing out the backspace key on this phone, but that one got past me. > I don't think they will, Avie. It's do easy to get paranoid about that sort > of thing though- I do it countless times a day. Wish I knew of a surefire > way to soothe that anxiety. > > We are all here for you, just remember that. > > > >> ahh bingeing again by 11:15AM! not eating now.. this, too, shall pass.. >> just hope everyone i see doesnt pick up on what's going on inside my > head.. >> >> thanks, >> Avie >> >> >> >>> >>> >>> Thanks for this title. Will check it out. >>> Sent on the Sprint® Now Network from my BlackBerry® >>> >>> Re: IOWL >>> >>> >>> Please, ramble away. You really struck a chord within me. There is no >>> reason >>> to not love ourselves. >>> >>> I guess that could be stated in the positive, too; there are countless >>> reasons to love ourselves. >>> >>> That's something I'm still trying to do, and I look forward to the day > when >>> >>> it comes naturally. >>> >>> >>> >>> Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted June 3, 2011 Report Share Posted June 3, 2011 I hear that voice often, A'mee. I think what's important and really a huge step forward is when we can stand up for ourselves, and argue with that negativity. Just shut it down, like you did. Thanks for the inspiration to keep fighting the good fight. And here's to cute tops! > Loving myself is not something that comes naturally. I do find that I am > making a more conscious effort now to shut up the nasty little voices that > want to make me feel bad. This morning as I was walking down a hallway I > saw a reflection of myself in the window. The first thought that came to my > head? " Good lord these pants make my ass look HUGE!! " And you know what? > I told myself to shut the hell up. I look fine. And my top is really cute. > > > It was really difficult to do. And I actually had to do the mental > equivalent of sticking my fingers in my ears and going " Lalalalalala I'm not > listening!! " when the voice tried to argue back. I was considering doing > it for real but people might have started to wonder. > > A'mee > > On Fri, Jun 3, 2011 at 7:17 AM, <rachel.laureene@... >wrote: > >> >> >> Please, ramble away. You really struck a chord within me. There is no >> reason >> to not love ourselves. >> >> I guess that could be stated in the positive, too; there are countless >> reasons to love ourselves. >> >> That's something I'm still trying to do, and I look forward to the day when >> it comes naturally. >> >> >> >> >> Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted June 9, 2011 Report Share Posted June 9, 2011 Hi , I've had some experiences that have shown me the same thing. It's a refreshing, relieving epiphany, but I still find myself stuck so often in that state of worry over how fat I look. They say to act " as if, " though. So I've been trying to act as if my weight isn't a big deal. I've been wearing pretty, feminine clothing that flatters my shape. I've been working on my posture when I remember. I've been working with what I've got, and although I could still cry sometimes when I really look at my naked body, I feel a LOT more confident. And I think it shows! On Tue, Jun 7, 2011 at 12:05 AM, Soliman < sarahsimone_soliman@...> wrote: > > > A college friend of mine said something very similar to me once. " The only > one > who cares about what size you wear is you. " > > Something I've learned this year is that people care a lot less how much I > weigh > than I always assumed they did. I'm not the biggest I've ever been, but I'm > up > there. Despite that, this year I've made some great new friends and gotten > romantic attention from two really attractive men. I think presenting > yourself > well is far more important than your weight. > > ________________________________ > > > To: insideoutweightloss > Sent: Mon, June 6, 2011 7:53:52 PM > > Subject: Re: Re: IOWL > > I like this! > Livingston > > ________________________________ > > To: insideoutweightloss > Sent: Sun, June 5, 2011 1:19:51 AM > Subject: Re: IOWL > > I've made a habit recently of looking at overweight people in the street, > asking > > myself : if this person weighed 2 kilos more, or 2 kilos less, would it > make any > > difference to me ? The answer is always no. I look more at her face, the > way she > > dresses, her smile, the ways she behaves with whoever is with her... This > helped > > me realize that we're the only ones obsessed by our weight, this is not > what the > > people around us see or are interested in. Did you notice that often, they > don't > > even notice wh'en we've lost weight and feel so good, or put on weight and > feel > so bad ? They don't even see it ! so maybe we should feel the same about > ourselves, like what there really is to like and dislike what there really > is to > > dislike... > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted June 9, 2011 Report Share Posted June 9, 2011 Ted, That's a good point to remember. From a young age, when I was being ridiculed in gym class for being a little bit bigger than other girls or for not being able to do a pull-up, to this day, I've always been very self-conscious when working out in front of others. Really when you think about it though, we've got no real, solid, concrete reason for this! It's all in our heads. We're so concerned about others judging us, but are they really? We can assume that they are, based on past experiences, or based on the judgements that we're passing on ourselves. But we can't read their minds. If we could, I bet we'd find that they were all just worried about what everyone else was thinking of them. I'm pretty sure physically fit people feel self-conscious, too. On Thu, Jun 9, 2011 at 11:59 AM, wrote: > Hi , > > I've had some experiences that have shown me the same thing. It's a > refreshing, relieving epiphany, but I still find myself stuck so often in > that state of worry over how fat I look. > > They say to act " as if, " though. So I've been trying to act as if my weight > isn't a big deal. I've been wearing pretty, feminine clothing that flatters > my shape. I've been working on my posture when I remember. I've been working > with what I've got, and although I could still cry sometimes when I really > look at my naked body, I feel a LOT more confident. And I think it shows! > > > > > On Tue, Jun 7, 2011 at 12:05 AM, Soliman < > sarahsimone_soliman@...> wrote: > >> >> >> A college friend of mine said something very similar to me once. " The only >> one >> who cares about what size you wear is you. " >> >> Something I've learned this year is that people care a lot less how much I >> weigh >> than I always assumed they did. I'm not the biggest I've ever been, but >> I'm up >> there. Despite that, this year I've made some great new friends and gotten >> >> romantic attention from two really attractive men. I think presenting >> yourself >> well is far more important than your weight. >> >> ________________________________ >> >> >> To: insideoutweightloss >> Sent: Mon, June 6, 2011 7:53:52 PM >> >> Subject: Re: Re: IOWL >> >> I like this! >> Livingston >> >> ________________________________ >> >> To: insideoutweightloss >> Sent: Sun, June 5, 2011 1:19:51 AM >> Subject: Re: IOWL >> >> I've made a habit recently of looking at overweight people in the street, >> asking >> >> myself : if this person weighed 2 kilos more, or 2 kilos less, would it >> make any >> >> difference to me ? The answer is always no. I look more at her face, the >> way she >> >> dresses, her smile, the ways she behaves with whoever is with her... This >> helped >> >> me realize that we're the only ones obsessed by our weight, this is not >> what the >> >> people around us see or are interested in. Did you notice that often, they >> don't >> >> even notice wh'en we've lost weight and feel so good, or put on weight and >> feel >> so bad ? They don't even see it ! so maybe we should feel the same about >> ourselves, like what there really is to like and dislike what there really >> is to >> >> dislike... >> >> >> >> Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted June 9, 2011 Report Share Posted June 9, 2011 thank you so much for the positive posts! I have been doing the same thing this past year. When I go out, I make sure I'm dressed nicely. I've bought clothes that actually fit well and I fix my hair and make up. I wear my tennis skirt to tennis and instead of using my usual excuse that I couldn't get to a ball because of my extra weight I now tell myself that's it's all in my head and I'm fit and can get to any ball (that's the truth!!) I've always had these running conversations in my head about what people may be saying about me. For example, at tennis I think they may be saying that i play great tennis and maybe if I lost some weight I could play even better or at the gym they might be saying something like...I work out so much and yet never lose weight so I must eat way too much or at the beach I think people are looking at me...well you get the idea. I have been working on this. Whenever these ideas pop into my head I say to myself.. " I don't care what other people think " . I find that I am a lot more comfortable around others when I can truly feel this and I can more easily come out of my shell and participate in conversations and games and I can laugh and reveal more of my true self. It's amazing too that people do pick up on this and find that they are more open towards me when I am not hiding behind the excuse of my extra weight. To: insideoutweightloss Sent: Thursday, June 9, 2011 8:04 PM Subject: Re: Re: IOWL Â Ted, That's a good point to remember. From a young age, when I was being ridiculed in gym class for being a little bit bigger than other girls or for not being able to do a pull-up, to this day, I've always been very self-conscious when working out in front of others. Really when you think about it though, we've got no real, solid, concrete reason for this! It's all in our heads. We're so concerned about others judging us, but are they really? We can assume that they are, based on past experiences, or based on the judgements that we're passing on ourselves. But we can't read their minds. If we could, I bet we'd find that they were all just worried about what everyone else was thinking of them. I'm pretty sure physically fit people feel self-conscious, too. On Thu, Jun 9, 2011 at 11:59 AM, wrote: > Hi , > > I've had some experiences that have shown me the same thing. It's a > refreshing, relieving epiphany, but I still find myself stuck so often in > that state of worry over how fat I look. > > They say to act " as if, " though. So I've been trying to act as if my weight > isn't a big deal. I've been wearing pretty, feminine clothing that flatters > my shape. I've been working on my posture when I remember. I've been working > with what I've got, and although I could still cry sometimes when I really > look at my naked body, I feel a LOT more confident. And I think it shows! > > > > > On Tue, Jun 7, 2011 at 12:05 AM, Soliman < > sarahsimone_soliman@...> wrote: > >> >> >> A college friend of mine said something very similar to me once. " The only >> one >> who cares about what size you wear is you. " >> >> Something I've learned this year is that people care a lot less how much I >> weigh >> than I always assumed they did. I'm not the biggest I've ever been, but >> I'm up >> there. Despite that, this year I've made some great new friends and gotten >> >> romantic attention from two really attractive men. I think presenting >> yourself >> well is far more important than your weight. >> >> ________________________________ >> >> >> To: insideoutweightloss >> Sent: Mon, June 6, 2011 7:53:52 PM >> >> Subject: Re: Re: IOWL >> >> I like this! >> Livingston >> >> ________________________________ >> >> To: insideoutweightloss >> Sent: Sun, June 5, 2011 1:19:51 AM >> Subject: Re: IOWL >> >> I've made a habit recently of looking at overweight people in the street, >> asking >> >> myself : if this person weighed 2 kilos more, or 2 kilos less, would it >> make any >> >> difference to me ? The answer is always no. I look more at her face, the >> way she >> >> dresses, her smile, the ways she behaves with whoever is with her... This >> helped >> >> me realize that we're the only ones obsessed by our weight, this is not >> what the >> >> people around us see or are interested in. Did you notice that often, they >> don't >> >> even notice wh'en we've lost weight and feel so good, or put on weight and >> feel >> so bad ? They don't even see it ! so maybe we should feel the same about >> ourselves, like what there really is to like and dislike what there really >> is to >> >> dislike... >> >> >> >> Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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