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Re: Ready to figure if all out. But the pieces aren't connecting.

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Posted
Posted

,

I am printing this out. There is such much wisdom in this. Sometimes too, I

have felt like peices of the puzzle started to fit together and parts of the

picture really started to take shape And then when feeling sort of ok I am lost

at what feels like the beginning again. Using your metaphor as a starting point

I can look both to the parts of the puzzle that have shape to give confidence as

i look at the new mass of puzzle pieces that have little sense in them and i can

look at the picture on the box (who i really am and what i deeply want) to guide

me about where to start on this new part of the puzzle.

Thanks for the great post.

Hugs.

Ready to figure if all out. But the pieces

aren't connecting.

>

>

> 

>I pre-ordered full-filled, read the book, followed the dig in exercises. I saw

everything was related to the podcasts I have listened to over the last 4

months. And now I feel more confused and overwhelmed than before. I have made no

ground in figuring this all out. I believe I really have no idea what I'm doing

and feel like a blind person trying to piece together a puzzle that I have all

the pieces for but having the hardest time connecting them. I almost feel as if

I'm trying too hard and therefore sabotaging actual progress. I have no idea how

to start at this point. I'm signed up to the full-filled class but really wonder

if it will make a difference or just cause me to get even more confused.

>

>Anyone else feel worse off with all the tools but no connection? Or am I alone

in this one?

>

>-Twana

>

>

>

>

>

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Twana,

I pre-ordered the book, too. And I've been getting a LOT out of it--but I've

been listening to the podcasts for 2.5 years now.... I can see how it could feel

overwhelming if you're more or less new to it.

My guess is that you're not actually worse off. My guess is that this feeling

means you're actually on the verge of a breakthrough of sorts--just like babies

seem to revert just before they make a big developmental jump. That's often how

progress works.

Puzzles often work that way, too. When you're at the beginning, whether you're

blind or not, you're faced with a huge mass of information (pieces). You can't

even take them all out of the box, because there's not room on the table, right?

But you have to start somewhere. Maybe you start by finding the border pieces.

Maybe--since you can't go by color--you put the pieces with a big round tab at

the top and a small hole towards the right over on this side, and the ones with

a small tab in the center and a big hole towards the left over there. Little by

little, you can at least figure out what pieces DON'T fit together. That's not

as satisfying as finding a match, but it is still progress. And then... maybe

you ask someone to help.

And then you start finding matches. Then more matches. Then... you get to the

point where you have fewer and fewer pieces left to put in, and things go faster

and faster.

Over time, you'll find that the IOWL pieces start fitting together faster and

faster, too. The class will probably be a very good way to start making those

connections. If nothing else, you will get expert feedback on whether you are

just trying too hard....

Even though I've been at this a long time, and my life has improved in ways I

never imagined, I can still get a bit overwhelmed. And I need to take another

good long look at the picture on the puzzle box, to see if I'm still even trying

to put it together right. :-) When that happens, I go back to basics. Start from

the beginning--episodes 0-18. I really listen--do any exercises--journal about

my responses. It really helps me refocus, and strengthen those connections.

Oh, and if I'm feeling that way, I try not to listen to too many podcasts in a

week. I'd rather listen to one a couple of times, and let it sink in....

Hang in there!

>________________________________

>

>To: insideoutweightloss

>Sent: Sunday, February 19, 2012 8:14 AM

>Subject: Ready to figure if all out. But the pieces

aren't connecting.

>

>

> 

>I pre-ordered full-filled, read the book, followed the dig in exercises. I saw

everything was related to the podcasts I have listened to over the last 4

months. And now I feel more confused and overwhelmed than before. I have made no

ground in figuring this all out. I believe I really have no idea what I'm doing

and feel like a blind person trying to piece together a puzzle that I have all

the pieces for but having the hardest time connecting them. I almost feel as if

I'm trying too hard and therefore sabotaging actual progress. I have no idea how

to start at this point. I'm signed up to the full-filled class but really wonder

if it will make a difference or just cause me to get even more confused.

>

>Anyone else feel worse off with all the tools but no connection? Or am I alone

in this one?

>

>-Twana

>

>

>

>

>

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Posted
Posted

I just wanted to say that this is a brilliant analogy.

> **

>

>

> Twana,

>

> I pre-ordered the book, too. And I've been getting a LOT out of it--but

> I've been listening to the podcasts for 2.5 years now.... I can see how it

> could feel overwhelming if you're more or less new to it.

>

> My guess is that you're not actually worse off. My guess is that this

> feeling means you're actually on the verge of a breakthrough of sorts--just

> like babies seem to revert just before they make a big developmental jump.

> That's often how progress works.

>

> Puzzles often work that way, too. When you're at the beginning, whether

> you're blind or not, you're faced with a huge mass of information (pieces).

> You can't even take them all out of the box, because there's not room on

> the table, right? But you have to start somewhere. Maybe you start by

> finding the border pieces. Maybe--since you can't go by color--you put the

> pieces with a big round tab at the top and a small hole towards the right

> over on this side, and the ones with a small tab in the center and a big

> hole towards the left over there. Little by little, you can at least figure

> out what pieces DON'T fit together. That's not as satisfying as finding a

> match, but it is still progress. And then... maybe you ask someone to help.

>

> And then you start finding matches. Then more matches. Then... you get to

> the point where you have fewer and fewer pieces left to put in, and things

> go faster and faster.

>

> Over time, you'll find that the IOWL pieces start fitting together faster

> and faster, too. The class will probably be a very good way to start making

> those connections. If nothing else, you will get expert feedback on whether

> you are just trying too hard....

>

> Even though I've been at this a long time, and my life has improved in

> ways I never imagined, I can still get a bit overwhelmed. And I need to

> take another good long look at the picture on the puzzle box, to see if I'm

> still even trying to put it together right. :-) When that happens, I go

> back to basics. Start from the beginning--episodes 0-18. I really

> listen--do any exercises--journal about my responses. It really helps me

> refocus, and strengthen those connections.

>

> Oh, and if I'm feeling that way, I try not to listen to too many podcasts

> in a week. I'd rather listen to one a couple of times, and let it sink

> in....

>

> Hang in there!

>

>

>

> >________________________________

> >

> >To: insideoutweightloss

> >Sent: Sunday, February 19, 2012 8:14 AM

> >Subject: Ready to figure if all out. But the pieces

> aren't connecting.

>

> >

> >

> >

> >I pre-ordered full-filled, read the book, followed the dig in exercises.

> I saw everything was related to the podcasts I have listened to over the

> last 4 months. And now I feel more confused and overwhelmed than before. I

> have made no ground in figuring this all out. I believe I really have no

> idea what I'm doing and feel like a blind person trying to piece together a

> puzzle that I have all the pieces for but having the hardest time

> connecting them. I almost feel as if I'm trying too hard and therefore

> sabotaging actual progress. I have no idea how to start at this point. I'm

> signed up to the full-filled class but really wonder if it will make a

> difference or just cause me to get even more confused.

> >

> >Anyone else feel worse off with all the tools but no connection? Or am I

> alone in this one?

> >

> >-Twana

> >

> >

> >

> >

> >

>

>

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Posted
Posted

Thank you and once again. You both help me again and again.

Sent from my iPhone

> ,

>

> I am printing this out. There is such much wisdom in this. Sometimes too, I

have felt like peices of the puzzle started to fit together and parts of the

picture really started to take shape And then when feeling sort of ok I am lost

at what feels like the beginning again. Using your metaphor as a starting point

I can look both to the parts of the puzzle that have shape to give confidence as

i look at the new mass of puzzle pieces that have little sense in them and i can

look at the picture on the box (who i really am and what i deeply want) to guide

me about where to start on this new part of the puzzle.

>

> Thanks for the great post.

>

> Hugs.

> Ready to figure if all out. But the pieces

aren't connecting.

> >

> >

> >

> >I pre-ordered full-filled, read the book, followed the dig in exercises. I

saw everything was related to the podcasts I have listened to over the last 4

months. And now I feel more confused and overwhelmed than before. I have made no

ground in figuring this all out. I believe I really have no idea what I'm doing

and feel like a blind person trying to piece together a puzzle that I have all

the pieces for but having the hardest time connecting them. I almost feel as if

I'm trying too hard and therefore sabotaging actual progress. I have no idea how

to start at this point. I'm signed up to the full-filled class but really wonder

if it will make a difference or just cause me to get even more confused.

> >

> >Anyone else feel worse off with all the tools but no connection? Or am I

alone in this one?

> >

> >-Twana

> >

> >

> >

> >

> >

>

>

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> I pre-ordered full-filled, read the book, followed the dig in exercises. I saw

everything was related to the podcasts I have listened to over the last 4

months. And now I feel more confused and overwhelmed than before. I have made no

ground in figuring this all out. I believe I really have no idea what I'm doing

and feel like a blind person trying to piece together a puzzle that I have all

the pieces for but having the hardest time connecting them. I almost feel as if

I'm trying too hard and therefore sabotaging actual progress. I have no idea how

to start at this point. I'm signed up to the full-filled class but really wonder

if it will make a difference or just cause me to get even more confused.

>

> Anyone else feel worse off with all the tools but no connection? Or am I alone

in this one?

>

No, you're not alone. Using 's jigsaw puzzle analogy - I think

that someone has taken some of my pieces...

Eldred

--

You can't start the next chapter of your life if you keep re-reading

the last one.

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Heh. In that case, do what you can, and then make some replacement pieces!

 

(Who actually just took Twana's analogy and ran with it... How are you doing,

Twana??)

>________________________________

>

>To: insideoutweightloss

>Sent: Wednesday, February 22, 2012 4:25 PM

>Subject: Re: Ready to figure if all out. But the pieces

aren't connecting.

>

>

> 

>

>> I pre-ordered full-filled, read the book, followed the dig in exercises. I

saw everything was related to the podcasts I have listened to over the last 4

months. And now I feel more confused and overwhelmed than before. I have made no

ground in figuring this all out. I believe I really have no idea what I'm doing

and feel like a blind person trying to piece together a puzzle that I have all

the pieces for but having the hardest time connecting them. I almost feel as if

I'm trying too hard and therefore sabotaging actual progress. I have no idea how

to start at this point. I'm signed up to the full-filled class but really wonder

if it will make a difference or just cause me to get even more confused.

>>

>> Anyone else feel worse off with all the tools but no connection? Or am I

alone in this one?

>>

>

>No, you're not alone. Using 's jigsaw puzzle analogy - I think

>that someone has taken some of my pieces...

>

>Eldred

>--

>You can't start the next chapter of your life if you keep re-reading

>the last one.

>

>

>

>

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Posted

Hi Eldred,

Sorry. My previous reply sounded really flippant. It falls in the category of

" true but not helpful. "  

Maybe it would be more helpful to go over my own path, looking for all the

pieces??

My weight issues started around first grade. Judging by pictures before then, I

was pretty much normal size, but by the time I was 6 I was in " Pretty Plus " . I

wasn't huge--I think I was about the smallest you could be and still need fat

clothes.... My first official diet was the summer before 9th grade. It was

doctor supervised, a 1500 calorie plan put together for diabetic kids. It was

OK, but... boring. So this was my first piece--controlling intake.

In college, my weight went up a lot, as I was suddenly exposed to a lot more

food--and no parents around to limit my intake. (Not that they were terribly

restrictive, but they were aware. And both had food issues.) But I also had a

lot more opportunities for physical activity. It was so easy to go to the pool,

or go to the gym, or take a fitness class, or run..... So here was my next

piece--activity. 

By the time I was 24, I was at my heaviest. Probably around 190. Not that

numbers matter that much.... For some reason, things aligned in such a way that

I knew I wanted to lose weight. So I put together the two pieces I knew

about--calorie counting and exercise--and lost quite successfully. I knew I was

an emotional eater, but at the time I just figured that was my identity. It

didn't occur to me that it was something I could change. 

I got down to a pretty healthy weight. I didn't feel thin, but I didn't feel

fat. Didn't feel like I needed to hate myself. I actually managed to maintain

the loss for several years--even after my pregnancy with twins, I got down to my

pre-pregnancy weight fairly quickly. The regain didn't really start until the

girls were around 2-3. It was a long, slow process, getting back up almost to

what my heaviest weight had been. I had toyed a little with diets along the way,

but nothing really lasted more than a month. (I eventually identified that as

another piece, but not one that you need for your puzzle, Eldred... I had to

learn how to factor monthly variations into whatever plan I tried if I wanted it

to work long term.)

One of my attempts was with a commercial diet site. It helped having a set menu.

I knew what to do; I didn't have to think. I knew they had support forums, but I

wasn't willing to try the first time around. But when I hit that desperation

point--when I knew I'd have to replace my jeans that were coming apart at the

seams, but I couldn't face a bigger size--I figured what could it hurt? Might as

well see if group support will get me anywhere. So there you go--finding support

was another very big piece. 

I found a few very good teams. I learned even more about calories--you might say

I found more pieces there as I learned about tracking macro nutrients, not just

calories, I learned more about various food allergies or sensitivities and how

they can play a role, and I learned just how much easier it could be to take

things like sugar out of your diet. I was exposed to so many more ideas for

exercise--different types of dance, yoga, running.... I went back to running

after a long break, and remembered why I liked it so much. I learned just how

important it was to have a place to turn when you don't know... where to turn.

The support was soooooo important--I think it was like not just finding some

missing pieces, it was like having someone give me a quarter of the puzzle

already put together.

Another huge piece of the puzzle that I found through the support was the idea

that yes, in fact, emotional eating can be addressed. That it is possible to

learn how to NOT eat just because sometimes life sucks. A lot. My biggest

support group at the time was very into no excuses--which at the time was good

for me. It made me face the emotions with my mouth closed.... I got a lot of

tools out of this group. A lot of pieces to help me on my way. But there was

still something missing. I think I was doing a lot of white knuckling. So even

though I was acknowledging the emotions, I didn't know what to do with them.

Sometimes sitting with the feeling is the right thing to do... but sometimes

it's not.

At any rate, with those pieces more or less assembled, I lost 45 pounds. Got

down to my lowest adult weight. And I kept it off for around two years. But...

something still wasn't right. Something was too rigid--too inflexible. It's like

when you put a piece in the wrong place, and it's close enough that it fits--but

then when you see it's actually in the wrong place, you realize it's stuck. And

not just that piece, but a whole bunch of nearby pieces. So you start ripping it

apart... Not just the pieces that don't fit, but the pieces that do. And because

the last stage of my puzzle was built on the idea of no excuses, I had obviously

failed, so I might as well keep ripping it apart, right???

The regain was slow at first. I was a little concerned, but not too much. Maybe

it's just age, you know? I had hit 40--maybe it's the magic metabolism meltdown.

But then I started a new job that totally threw me off balance--I gained 11

pounds in 6 months. 

You know how talks about inner alignment? At this point, ALL of me put on

the breaks. The parts of me that were stressed by the job, the parts of me that

enjoyed eating, the parts of me that were too tired to exercise, ALL of these

parts had their positive intent--to make me feel better. And ALL of these parts

suddenly woke up and realized that they were going about it the wrong way.

Basically, I woke up one day thinking " I love myself too much to keep this up. "  

Ahem. VERY important piece to the puzzle, you know? Loving yourself. Too much?

Try liking yourself. Or as a start, accepting yourself. 

I knew it was time for a change, but I also knew what I couldn't do. I couldn't

do the 90-minute exercise sessions. I couldn't' do the meticulous calorie

counting. I couldn't do the no excuses. I couldn't do the sneaking out of

community events to eat at home, because I was afraid of " not quite perfect "

food choices. Around that time, someone on one of my support teams (which had

since moved to SparkPeople) mentioned IOWL for the second or third time. I was

hooked from the prologue. And it didn't take too much longer to figure out a

major piece that I had been missing.

Forgiveness.

Forgiving myself if I overate. (I was afraid of this at first. My experience

with diet support groups left me too familiar with the confession mentality.

" Oh, I overate, but it's OK, I forgive myself, tomorrow's another day. " )

Forgiving myself for being imperfect. Forgiving myself if I did well! (Yup.

Weird, eh?) Forgiving others, whether they " deserved " it or not. 

There were a lot of other pieces as well--like using EFT to deal with emotional

situations, instead of white-knuckling it. Like learning to enjoy hunger. (I

didn't have hunger phobia--I had fear of low blood sugar phobia. When I was

controlling my calories so tightly, I'd often crash before I registered hunger.)

Like learning to identify fullness (I needed the Appetite Adjuster download for

that). Oh, and let's not forget positive intent!! My life became so much easier

when I could look at a situation where I felt like there was inner conflict and

just say " what's the positive intent here? " Like, " why am I still sitting in

front of the computer drinking my coffee when I had planned a nice long run? Oh!

Because I really want a short, brisk walk! And if I keep sitting here, I won't

have time for the long run. " Funny how often I'll jump up and exercise at that

point, AND have time for something else, if I just look for the positive

intent. 

OK, Eldred. At the end of the day, I don't know if this is any more helpful than

a short, flip response. But these are a lot of the pieces I've picked up along

the way. Do you have any/most/all of these pieces? Have you found ways to fit

them into your life?

Maybe it would help to actually list the pieces you have (whether you've managed

to fit them together, or you just know you have them)?

(who somehow forgot to mention gratitude, and the positive effects of

regularly seeking out things we're grateful for....)

>________________________________

>

>To: " insideoutweightloss " <insideoutweightloss >

>Sent: Thursday, February 23, 2012 7:15 PM

>Subject: Re: Ready to figure if all out. But the pieces

aren't connecting.

>

>

>Heh. In that case, do what you can, and then make some replacement pieces!

>

>

> 

>(Who actually just took Twana's analogy and ran with it... How are you doing,

Twana??)

>

>

>

>>________________________________

>>

>>To: insideoutweightloss

>>Sent: Wednesday, February 22, 2012 4:25 PM

>>Subject: Re: Ready to figure if all out. But the pieces

aren't connecting.

>>

>>

>> 

>>...>

>>

>>No, you're not alone. Using 's jigsaw puzzle analogy - I think

>>that someone has taken some of my pieces...

>>

>>Eldred

>>-- 

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Posted
Posted

WOW! I am so grateful for YOU !! You are the coolest puzzle I

" virtually " know!! Thanks for breaking down the pieces and sharing it

with us all!

Love and peace...piece by piece,

> Hi Eldred,

>

> Sorry. My previous reply sounded really flippant. It falls in the

> category of " true but not helpful. "

>

> Maybe it would be more helpful to go over my own path, looking for

> all the pieces??

>

> My weight issues started around first grade. Judging by pictures

> before then, I was pretty much normal size, but by the time I was 6

> I was in " Pretty Plus " . I wasn't huge--I think I was about the

> smallest you could be and still need fat clothes.... My first

> official diet was the summer before 9th grade. It was doctor

> supervised, a 1500 calorie plan put together for diabetic kids. It

> was OK, but... boring. So this was my first piece--controlling intake.

>

> In college, my weight went up a lot, as I was suddenly exposed to a

> lot more food--and no parents around to limit my intake. (Not that

> they were terribly restrictive, but they were aware. And both had

> food issues.) But I also had a lot more opportunities for physical

> activity. It was so easy to go to the pool, or go to the gym, or

> take a fitness class, or run..... So here was my next piece--activity.

>

> By the time I was 24, I was at my heaviest. Probably around 190. Not

> that numbers matter that much.... For some reason, things aligned in

> such a way that I knew I wanted to lose weight. So I put together

> the two pieces I knew about--calorie counting and exercise--and lost

> quite successfully. I knew I was an emotional eater, but at the time

> I just figured that was my identity. It didn't occur to me that it

> was something I could change.

>

> I got down to a pretty healthy weight. I didn't feel thin, but I

> didn't feel fat. Didn't feel like I needed to hate myself. I

> actually managed to maintain the loss for several years--even after

> my pregnancy with twins, I got down to my pre-pregnancy weight

> fairly quickly. The regain didn't really start until the girls were

> around 2-3. It was a long, slow process, getting back up almost to

> what my heaviest weight had been. I had toyed a little with diets

> along the way, but nothing really lasted more than a month. (I

> eventually identified that as another piece, but not one that you

> need for your puzzle, Eldred... I had to learn how to factor monthly

> variations into whatever plan I tried if I wanted it to work long

> term.)

>

> One of my attempts was with a commercial diet site. It helped having

> a set menu. I knew what to do; I didn't have to think. I knew they

> had support forums, but I wasn't willing to try the first time

> around. But when I hit that desperation point--when I knew I'd have

> to replace my jeans that were coming apart at the seams, but I

> couldn't face a bigger size--I figured what could it hurt? Might as

> well see if group support will get me anywhere. So there you go--

> finding support was another very big piece.

>

> I found a few very good teams. I learned even more about calories--

> you might say I found more pieces there as I learned about tracking

> macro nutrients, not just calories, I learned more about various

> food allergies or sensitivities and how they can play a role, and I

> learned just how much easier it could be to take things like sugar

> out of your diet. I was exposed to so many more ideas for exercise--

> different types of dance, yoga, running.... I went back to running

> after a long break, and remembered why I liked it so much. I learned

> just how important it was to have a place to turn when you don't

> know... where to turn. The support was soooooo important--I think it

> was like not just finding some missing pieces, it was like having

> someone give me a quarter of the puzzle already put together.

>

> Another huge piece of the puzzle that I found through the support

> was the idea that yes, in fact, emotional eating can be addressed.

> That it is possible to learn how to NOT eat just because sometimes

> life sucks. A lot. My biggest support group at the time was very

> into no excuses--which at the time was good for me. It made me face

> the emotions with my mouth closed.... I got a lot of tools out of

> this group. A lot of pieces to help me on my way. But there was

> still something missing. I think I was doing a lot of white

> knuckling. So even though I was acknowledging the emotions, I didn't

> know what to do with them. Sometimes sitting with the feeling is the

> right thing to do... but sometimes it's not.

>

> At any rate, with those pieces more or less assembled, I lost 45

> pounds. Got down to my lowest adult weight. And I kept it off for

> around two years. But... something still wasn't right. Something was

> too rigid--too inflexible. It's like when you put a piece in the

> wrong place, and it's close enough that it fits--but then when you

> see it's actually in the wrong place, you realize it's stuck. And

> not just that piece, but a whole bunch of nearby pieces. So you

> start ripping it apart... Not just the pieces that don't fit, but

> the pieces that do. And because the last stage of my puzzle was

> built on the idea of no excuses, I had obviously failed, so I might

> as well keep ripping it apart, right???

>

> The regain was slow at first. I was a little concerned, but not too

> much. Maybe it's just age, you know? I had hit 40--maybe it's the

> magic metabolism meltdown. But then I started a new job that totally

> threw me off balance--I gained 11 pounds in 6 months.

>

> You know how talks about inner alignment? At this point, ALL

> of me put on the breaks. The parts of me that were stressed by the

> job, the parts of me that enjoyed eating, the parts of me that were

> too tired to exercise, ALL of these parts had their positive intent--

> to make me feel better. And ALL of these parts suddenly woke up and

> realized that they were going about it the wrong way. Basically, I

> woke up one day thinking " I love myself too much to keep this up. "

>

> Ahem. VERY important piece to the puzzle, you know? Loving yourself.

> Too much? Try liking yourself. Or as a start, accepting yourself.

>

> I knew it was time for a change, but I also knew what I couldn't do.

> I couldn't do the 90-minute exercise sessions. I couldn't' do the

> meticulous calorie counting. I couldn't do the no excuses. I

> couldn't do the sneaking out of community events to eat at home,

> because I was afraid of " not quite perfect " food choices. Around

> that time, someone on one of my support teams (which had since moved

> to SparkPeople) mentioned IOWL for the second or third time. I was

> hooked from the prologue. And it didn't take too much longer to

> figure out a major piece that I had been missing.

>

> Forgiveness.

>

> Forgiving myself if I overate. (I was afraid of this at first. My

> experience with diet support groups left me too familiar with the

> confession mentality. " Oh, I overate, but it's OK, I forgive myself,

> tomorrow's another day. " ) Forgiving myself for being imperfect.

> Forgiving myself if I did well! (Yup. Weird, eh?) Forgiving others,

> whether they " deserved " it or not.

>

> There were a lot of other pieces as well--like using EFT to deal

> with emotional situations, instead of white-knuckling it. Like

> learning to enjoy hunger. (I didn't have hunger phobia--I had fear

> of low blood sugar phobia. When I was controlling my calories so

> tightly, I'd often crash before I registered hunger.) Like learning

> to identify fullness (I needed the Appetite Adjuster download for

> that). Oh, and let's not forget positive intent!! My life became so

> much easier when I could look at a situation where I felt like there

> was inner conflict and just say " what's the positive intent here? "

> Like, " why am I still sitting in front of the computer drinking my

> coffee when I had planned a nice long run? Oh! Because I really want

> a short, brisk walk! And if I keep sitting here, I won't have time

> for the long run. " Funny how often I'll jump up and exercise at that

> point, AND have time for something else, if I just look for the

> positive intent.

>

> OK, Eldred. At the end of the day, I don't know if this is any more

> helpful than a short, flip response. But these are a lot of the

> pieces I've picked up along the way. Do you have any/most/all of

> these pieces? Have you found ways to fit them into your life?

>

> Maybe it would help to actually list the pieces you have (whether

> you've managed to fit them together, or you just know you have them)?

>

> (who somehow forgot to mention gratitude, and the positive

> effects of regularly seeking out things we're grateful for....)

>

> >________________________________

> >

> >To: " insideoutweightloss "

<insideoutweightloss

> >

> >Sent: Thursday, February 23, 2012 7:15 PM

> >Subject: Re: Ready to figure if all out. But

> the pieces aren't connecting.

> >

> >

> >Heh. In that case, do what you can, and then make some replacement

> pieces!

> >

> >

> >

> >(Who actually just took Twana's analogy and ran with it... How are

> you doing, Twana??)

> >

> >

> >

> >>________________________________

> >>

> >>To: insideoutweightloss

> >>Sent: Wednesday, February 22, 2012 4:25 PM

> >>Subject: Re: Ready to figure if all out. But

> the pieces aren't connecting.

> >>

> >>

> >>

> >>...>

> >>

> >>No, you're not alone. Using 's jigsaw puzzle analogy - I think

> >>that someone has taken some of my pieces...

> >>

> >>Eldred

> >>--

>

>

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Posted
Posted

, this makes so much sense to me! I agree. We just can't check out of life

for very long just to lose weight but that is what the majority of the weight

loss plans and websites want. Having to leave and event to secretly eat at home

is ridiculous!

We all tried everything but standing on our head.

Bren

________________________________

To: " insideoutweightloss " <insideoutweightloss >

Sent: Friday, February 24, 2012 5:20 AM

Subject: Re: Ready to figure if all out. But the pieces

aren't connecting.

 

Hi Eldred,

Sorry. My previous reply sounded really flippant. It falls in the category of

" true but not helpful. "  

Maybe it would be more helpful to go over my own path, looking for all the

pieces??

My weight issues started around first grade. Judging by pictures before then, I

was pretty much normal size, but by the time I was 6 I was in " Pretty Plus " . I

wasn't huge--I think I was about the smallest you could be and still need fat

clothes.... My first official diet was the summer before 9th grade. It was

doctor supervised, a 1500 calorie plan put together for diabetic kids. It was

OK, but... boring. So this was my first piece--controlling intake.

In college, my weight went up a lot, as I was suddenly exposed to a lot more

food--and no parents around to limit my intake. (Not that they were terribly

restrictive, but they were aware. And both had food issues.) But I also had a

lot more opportunities for physical activity. It was so easy to go to the pool,

or go to the gym, or take a fitness class, or run..... So here was my next

piece--activity. 

By the time I was 24, I was at my heaviest. Probably around 190. Not that

numbers matter that much.... For some reason, things aligned in such a way that

I knew I wanted to lose weight. So I put together the two pieces I knew

about--calorie counting and exercise--and lost quite successfully. I knew I was

an emotional eater, but at the time I just figured that was my identity. It

didn't occur to me that it was something I could change. 

I got down to a pretty healthy weight. I didn't feel thin, but I didn't feel

fat. Didn't feel like I needed to hate myself. I actually managed to maintain

the loss for several years--even after my pregnancy with twins, I got down to my

pre-pregnancy weight fairly quickly. The regain didn't really start until the

girls were around 2-3. It was a long, slow process, getting back up almost to

what my heaviest weight had been. I had toyed a little with diets along the way,

but nothing really lasted more than a month. (I eventually identified that as

another piece, but not one that you need for your puzzle, Eldred... I had to

learn how to factor monthly variations into whatever plan I tried if I wanted it

to work long term.)

One of my attempts was with a commercial diet site. It helped having a set menu.

I knew what to do; I didn't have to think. I knew they had support forums, but I

wasn't willing to try the first time around. But when I hit that desperation

point--when I knew I'd have to replace my jeans that were coming apart at the

seams, but I couldn't face a bigger size--I figured what could it hurt? Might as

well see if group support will get me anywhere. So there you go--finding support

was another very big piece. 

I found a few very good teams. I learned even more about calories--you might say

I found more pieces there as I learned about tracking macro nutrients, not just

calories, I learned more about various food allergies or sensitivities and how

they can play a role, and I learned just how much easier it could be to take

things like sugar out of your diet. I was exposed to so many more ideas for

exercise--different types of dance, yoga, running.... I went back to running

after a long break, and remembered why I liked it so much. I learned just how

important it was to have a place to turn when you don't know... where to turn.

The support was soooooo important--I think it was like not just finding some

missing pieces, it was like having someone give me a quarter of the puzzle

already put together.

Another huge piece of the puzzle that I found through the support was the idea

that yes, in fact, emotional eating can be addressed. That it is possible to

learn how to NOT eat just because sometimes life sucks. A lot. My biggest

support group at the time was very into no excuses--which at the time was good

for me. It made me face the emotions with my mouth closed.... I got a lot of

tools out of this group. A lot of pieces to help me on my way. But there was

still something missing. I think I was doing a lot of white knuckling. So even

though I was acknowledging the emotions, I didn't know what to do with them.

Sometimes sitting with the feeling is the right thing to do... but sometimes

it's not.

At any rate, with those pieces more or less assembled, I lost 45 pounds. Got

down to my lowest adult weight. And I kept it off for around two years. But...

something still wasn't right. Something was too rigid--too inflexible. It's like

when you put a piece in the wrong place, and it's close enough that it fits--but

then when you see it's actually in the wrong place, you realize it's stuck. And

not just that piece, but a whole bunch of nearby pieces. So you start ripping it

apart... Not just the pieces that don't fit, but the pieces that do. And because

the last stage of my puzzle was built on the idea of no excuses, I had obviously

failed, so I might as well keep ripping it apart, right???

The regain was slow at first. I was a little concerned, but not too much. Maybe

it's just age, you know? I had hit 40--maybe it's the magic metabolism meltdown.

But then I started a new job that totally threw me off balance--I gained 11

pounds in 6 months. 

You know how talks about inner alignment? At this point, ALL of me put on

the breaks. The parts of me that were stressed by the job, the parts of me that

enjoyed eating, the parts of me that were too tired to exercise, ALL of these

parts had their positive intent--to make me feel better. And ALL of these parts

suddenly woke up and realized that they were going about it the wrong way.

Basically, I woke up one day thinking " I love myself too much to keep this

up. "  

Ahem. VERY important piece to the puzzle, you know? Loving yourself. Too much?

Try liking yourself. Or as a start, accepting yourself. 

I knew it was time for a change, but I also knew what I couldn't do. I couldn't

do the 90-minute exercise sessions. I couldn't' do the meticulous calorie

counting. I couldn't do the no excuses. I couldn't do the sneaking out of

community events to eat at home, because I was afraid of " not quite perfect "

food choices. Around that time, someone on one of my support teams (which had

since moved to SparkPeople) mentioned IOWL for the second or third time. I was

hooked from the prologue. And it didn't take too much longer to figure out a

major piece that I had been missing.

Forgiveness.

Forgiving myself if I overate. (I was afraid of this at first. My experience

with diet support groups left me too familiar with the confession mentality.

" Oh, I overate, but it's OK, I forgive myself, tomorrow's another day. " )

Forgiving myself for being imperfect. Forgiving myself if I did well! (Yup.

Weird, eh?) Forgiving others, whether they " deserved " it or not. 

There were a lot of other pieces as well--like using EFT to deal with emotional

situations, instead of white-knuckling it. Like learning to enjoy hunger. (I

didn't have hunger phobia--I had fear of low blood sugar phobia. When I was

controlling my calories so tightly, I'd often crash before I registered hunger.)

Like learning to identify fullness (I needed the Appetite Adjuster download for

that). Oh, and let's not forget positive intent!! My life became so much easier

when I could look at a situation where I felt like there was inner conflict and

just say " what's the positive intent here? " Like, " why am I still sitting in

front of the computer drinking my coffee when I had planned a nice long run? Oh!

Because I really want a short, brisk walk! And if I keep sitting here, I won't

have time for the long run. " Funny how often I'll jump up and exercise at that

point, AND have time for something else, if I just look for the positive

intent. 

OK, Eldred. At the end of the day, I don't know if this is any more helpful than

a short, flip response. But these are a lot of the pieces I've picked up along

the way. Do you have any/most/all of these pieces? Have you found ways to fit

them into your life?

Maybe it would help to actually list the pieces you have (whether you've managed

to fit them together, or you just know you have them)?

(who somehow forgot to mention gratitude, and the positive effects of

regularly seeking out things we're grateful for....)

>________________________________

>

>To: " insideoutweightloss " <insideoutweightloss >

>Sent: Thursday, February 23, 2012 7:15 PM

>Subject: Re: Ready to figure if all out. But the pieces

aren't connecting.

>

>

>Heh. In that case, do what you can, and then make some replacement pieces!

>

>

> 

>(Who actually just took Twana's analogy and ran with it... How are you doing,

Twana??)

>

>

>

>>________________________________

>>

>>To: insideoutweightloss

>>Sent: Wednesday, February 22, 2012 4:25 PM

>>Subject: Re: Ready to figure if all out. But the pieces

aren't connecting.

>>

>>

>> 

>>...>

>>

>>No, you're not alone. Using 's jigsaw puzzle analogy - I think

>>that someone has taken some of my pieces...

>>

>>Eldred

>>-- 

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Posted
Posted

> Hi Eldred,

>

> Sorry. My previous reply sounded really flippant. It falls in the category of

" true but not helpful. "

>

Not a problem...

>

> OK, Eldred. At the end of the day, I don't know if this is any more helpful

than a short, flip response. But these are a lot of the pieces I've picked up

along the way. Do you have any/most/all of these pieces? Have you found ways to

fit them into your life?

>

> Maybe it would help to actually list the pieces you have (whether you've

managed to fit them together, or you just know you have them)?

>

> (who somehow forgot to mention gratitude, and the positive effects of

regularly seeking out things we're grateful for....)

>

>

I don't know if I could logically say if I have any pieces. I mean, I

know that to release weight, you need to burn more calories than you

take in. That's simple math. Does saying that you need to eat less

and move more mean you have any pieces of the puzzle? I actually

*lost* weight when I went to college - dropped from 150 to about 135,

and was in the best shape of my life. But I don't know what the

positive intent of my behavior is. I don't remember when or why I

started eating more than my body needed, but it was long after I

dropped out of college.

I don't see that I'm trying to 'punish' myself for sins, real or

imagined. I'm just really puzzled. makes a LOT of sense, but I

don't yet know how to fit that logic into my life...

Eldred

--

Raising money for Make-a-Wish!  Donation page at http://wam300.org

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Posted
Posted

Wow ...This really spoke to me!  I think the piece that resonated the most

with me was the part about the " forgiveness " piece.  I know it is an important

piece that would make a huge difference for me if I could just pick it up more

often.  However, I think it falls on the floor, gets kicked under the couch and

I just can't seem to find it.  I really like the analogy of the puzzle

pieces. 

Subject: Re: Ready to figure if all out. But the pieces

aren't connecting.

To: " insideoutweightloss " <insideoutweightloss >

Date: Friday, February 24, 2012, 5:20 AM

 

Hi Eldred,

Sorry. My previous reply sounded really flippant. It falls in the category of

" true but not helpful. "  

Maybe it would be more helpful to go over my own path, looking for all the

pieces??

My weight issues started around first grade. Judging by pictures before then, I

was pretty much normal size, but by the time I was 6 I was in " Pretty Plus " . I

wasn't huge--I think I was about the smallest you could be and still need fat

clothes.... My first official diet was the summer before 9th grade. It was

doctor supervised, a 1500 calorie plan put together for diabetic kids. It was

OK, but... boring. So this was my first piece--controlling intake.

In college, my weight went up a lot, as I was suddenly exposed to a lot more

food--and no parents around to limit my intake. (Not that they were terribly

restrictive, but they were aware. And both had food issues.) But I also had a

lot more opportunities for physical activity. It was so easy to go to the pool,

or go to the gym, or take a fitness class, or run..... So here was my next

piece--activity. 

By the time I was 24, I was at my heaviest. Probably around 190. Not that

numbers matter that much.... For some reason, things aligned in such a way that

I knew I wanted to lose weight. So I put together the two pieces I knew

about--calorie counting and exercise--and lost quite successfully. I knew I was

an emotional eater, but at the time I just figured that was my identity. It

didn't occur to me that it was something I could change. 

I got down to a pretty healthy weight. I didn't feel thin, but I didn't feel

fat. Didn't feel like I needed to hate myself. I actually managed to maintain

the loss for several years--even after my pregnancy with twins, I got down to my

pre-pregnancy weight fairly quickly. The regain didn't really start until the

girls were around 2-3. It was a long, slow process, getting back up almost to

what my heaviest weight had been. I had toyed a little with diets along the way,

but nothing really lasted more than a month. (I eventually identified that as

another piece, but not one that you need for your puzzle, Eldred... I had to

learn how to factor monthly variations into whatever plan I tried if I wanted it

to work long term.)

One of my attempts was with a commercial diet site. It helped having a set menu.

I knew what to do; I didn't have to think. I knew they had support forums, but I

wasn't willing to try the first time around. But when I hit that desperation

point--when I knew I'd have to replace my jeans that were coming apart at the

seams, but I couldn't face a bigger size--I figured what could it hurt? Might as

well see if group support will get me anywhere. So there you go--finding support

was another very big piece. 

I found a few very good teams. I learned even more about calories--you might say

I found more pieces there as I learned about tracking macro nutrients, not just

calories, I learned more about various food allergies or sensitivities and how

they can play a role, and I learned just how much easier it could be to take

things like sugar out of your diet. I was exposed to so many more ideas for

exercise--different types of dance, yoga, running.... I went back to running

after a long break, and remembered why I liked it so much. I learned just how

important it was to have a place to turn when you don't know... where to turn.

The support was soooooo important--I think it was like not just finding some

missing pieces, it was like having someone give me a quarter of the puzzle

already put together.

Another huge piece of the puzzle that I found through the support was the idea

that yes, in fact, emotional eating can be addressed. That it is possible to

learn how to NOT eat just because sometimes life sucks. A lot. My biggest

support group at the time was very into no excuses--which at the time was good

for me. It made me face the emotions with my mouth closed.... I got a lot of

tools out of this group. A lot of pieces to help me on my way. But there was

still something missing. I think I was doing a lot of white knuckling. So even

though I was acknowledging the emotions, I didn't know what to do with them.

Sometimes sitting with the feeling is the right thing to do... but sometimes

it's not.

At any rate, with those pieces more or less assembled, I lost 45 pounds. Got

down to my lowest adult weight. And I kept it off for around two years. But...

something still wasn't right. Something was too rigid--too inflexible. It's like

when you put a piece in the wrong place, and it's close enough that it fits--but

then when you see it's actually in the wrong place, you realize it's stuck. And

not just that piece, but a whole bunch of nearby pieces. So you start ripping it

apart... Not just the pieces that don't fit, but the pieces that do. And because

the last stage of my puzzle was built on the idea of no excuses, I had obviously

failed, so I might as well keep ripping it apart, right???

The regain was slow at first. I was a little concerned, but not too much. Maybe

it's just age, you know? I had hit 40--maybe it's the magic metabolism meltdown.

But then I started a new job that totally threw me off balance--I gained 11

pounds in 6 months. 

You know how talks about inner alignment? At this point, ALL of me put on

the breaks. The parts of me that were stressed by the job, the parts of me that

enjoyed eating, the parts of me that were too tired to exercise, ALL of these

parts had their positive intent--to make me feel better. And ALL of these parts

suddenly woke up and realized that they were going about it the wrong way.

Basically, I woke up one day thinking " I love myself too much to keep this

up. "  

Ahem. VERY important piece to the puzzle, you know? Loving yourself. Too much?

Try liking yourself. Or as a start, accepting yourself. 

I knew it was time for a change, but I also knew what I couldn't do. I couldn't

do the 90-minute exercise sessions. I couldn't' do the meticulous calorie

counting. I couldn't do the no excuses. I couldn't do the sneaking out of

community events to eat at home, because I was afraid of " not quite perfect "

food choices. Around that time, someone on one of my support teams (which had

since moved to SparkPeople) mentioned IOWL for the second or third time. I was

hooked from the prologue. And it didn't take too much longer to figure out a

major piece that I had been missing.

Forgiveness.

Forgiving myself if I overate. (I was afraid of this at first. My experience

with diet support groups left me too familiar with the confession mentality.

" Oh, I overate, but it's OK, I forgive myself, tomorrow's another day. " )

Forgiving myself for being imperfect. Forgiving myself if I did well! (Yup.

Weird, eh?) Forgiving others, whether they " deserved " it or not. 

There were a lot of other pieces as well--like using EFT to deal with emotional

situations, instead of white-knuckling it. Like learning to enjoy hunger. (I

didn't have hunger phobia--I had fear of low blood sugar phobia. When I was

controlling my calories so tightly, I'd often crash before I registered hunger.)

Like learning to identify fullness (I needed the Appetite Adjuster download for

that). Oh, and let's not forget positive intent!! My life became so much easier

when I could look at a situation where I felt like there was inner conflict and

just say " what's the positive intent here? " Like, " why am I still sitting in

front of the computer drinking my coffee when I had planned a nice long run? Oh!

Because I really want a short, brisk walk! And if I keep sitting here, I won't

have time for the long run. " Funny how often I'll jump up and exercise at that

point, AND have time for something else, if I just look for the positive

intent. 

OK, Eldred. At the end of the day, I don't know if this is any more helpful than

a short, flip response. But these are a lot of the pieces I've picked up along

the way. Do you have any/most/all of these pieces? Have you found ways to fit

them into your life?

Maybe it would help to actually list the pieces you have (whether you've managed

to fit them together, or you just know you have them)?

(who somehow forgot to mention gratitude, and the positive effects of

regularly seeking out things we're grateful for....)

>________________________________

>

>To: " insideoutweightloss " <insideoutweightloss >

>Sent: Thursday, February 23, 2012 7:15 PM

>Subject: Re: Ready to figure if all out. But the pieces

aren't connecting.

>

>

>Heh. In that case, do what you can, and then make some replacement pieces!

>

>

> 

>(Who actually just took Twana's analogy and ran with it... How are you doing,

Twana??)

>

>

>

>>________________________________

>>

>>To: insideoutweightloss

>>Sent: Wednesday, February 22, 2012 4:25 PM

>>Subject: Re: Ready to figure if all out. But the pieces

aren't connecting.

>>

>>

>> 

>>...>

>>

>>No, you're not alone. Using 's jigsaw puzzle analogy - I think

>>that someone has taken some of my pieces...

>>

>>Eldred

>>-- 

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Share on other sites
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Posted
Posted

Hi :

Forgiveness has been a big part of my journey and I was really helped

by the book Radical Forgiveness by Colin Tipping. He has a website:

http://www.radicalforgiveness.com

and there is a free worksheet that helps you through the process.

If you scroll down to Support and Free Downloads then go to the

Radical Forgiveness worksheet you can download it and print it out and

use it whenever you need to forgive somebody. Essentially his message

is that each situation is a gift to learn something about ourselves.

It's free and incredibly freeing!! There is also a free worksheet for

self-forgiveness as well. Anybody need that around here? : )

Peace, love, beaches,

>

>

> Wow ...This really spoke to me! I think the piece that

> resonated the most with me was the part about the " forgiveness "

> piece. I know it is an important piece that would make a huge

> difference for me if I could just pick it up more often. However, I

> think it falls on the floor, gets kicked under the couch and I just

> can't seem to find it. I really like the analogy of the puzzle

> pieces.

>

>

>

> Subject: Re: Ready to figure if all out. But

> the pieces aren't connecting.

> To: " insideoutweightloss " <insideoutweightloss

> >

> Date: Friday, February 24, 2012, 5:20 AM

>

>

>

> Hi Eldred,

>

> Sorry. My previous reply sounded really flippant. It falls in the

> category of " true but not helpful. "

>

> Maybe it would be more helpful to go over my own path, looking for

> all the pieces??

>

> My weight issues started around first grade. Judging by pictures

> before then, I was pretty much normal size, but by the time I was 6

> I was in " Pretty Plus " . I wasn't huge--I think I was about the

> smallest you could be and still need fat clothes.... My first

> official diet was the summer before 9th grade. It was doctor

> supervised, a 1500 calorie plan put together for diabetic kids. It

> was OK, but... boring. So this was my first piece--controlling intake.

>

> In college, my weight went up a lot, as I was suddenly exposed to a

> lot more food--and no parents around to limit my intake. (Not that

> they were terribly restrictive, but they were aware. And both had

> food issues.) But I also had a lot more opportunities for physical

> activity. It was so easy to go to the pool, or go to the gym, or

> take a fitness class, or run..... So here was my next piece--activity.

>

> By the time I was 24, I was at my heaviest. Probably around 190. Not

> that numbers matter that much.... For some reason, things aligned in

> such a way that I knew I wanted to lose weight. So I put together

> the two pieces I knew about--calorie counting and exercise--and lost

> quite successfully. I knew I was an emotional eater, but at the time

> I just figured that was my identity. It didn't occur to me that it

> was something I could change.

>

> I got down to a pretty healthy weight. I didn't feel thin, but I

> didn't feel fat. Didn't feel like I needed to hate myself. I

> actually managed to maintain the loss for several years--even after

> my pregnancy with twins, I got down to my pre-pregnancy weight

> fairly quickly. The regain didn't really start until the girls were

> around 2-3. It was a long, slow process, getting back up almost to

> what my heaviest weight had been. I had toyed a little with diets

> along the way, but nothing really lasted more than a month. (I

> eventually identified that as another piece, but not one that you

> need for your puzzle, Eldred... I had to learn how to factor monthly

> variations into whatever plan I tried if I wanted it to work long

> term.)

>

> One of my attempts was with a commercial diet site. It helped having

> a set menu. I knew what to do; I didn't have to think. I knew they

> had support forums, but I wasn't willing to try the first time

> around. But when I hit that desperation point--when I knew I'd have

> to replace my jeans that were coming apart at the seams, but I

> couldn't face a bigger size--I figured what could it hurt? Might as

> well see if group support will get me anywhere. So there you go--

> finding support was another very big piece.

>

> I found a few very good teams. I learned even more about calories--

> you might say I found more pieces there as I learned about tracking

> macro nutrients, not just calories, I learned more about various

> food allergies or sensitivities and how they can play a role, and I

> learned just how much easier it could be to take things like sugar

> out of your diet. I was exposed to so many more ideas for exercise--

> different types of dance, yoga, running.... I went back to running

> after a long break, and remembered why I liked it so much. I learned

> just how important it was to have a place to turn when you don't

> know... where to turn. The support was soooooo important--I think it

> was like not just finding some missing pieces, it was like having

> someone give me a quarter of the puzzle already put together.

>

> Another huge piece of the puzzle that I found through the support

> was the idea that yes, in fact, emotional eating can be addressed.

> That it is possible to learn how to NOT eat just because sometimes

> life sucks. A lot. My biggest support group at the time was very

> into no excuses--which at the time was good for me. It made me face

> the emotions with my mouth closed.... I got a lot of tools out of

> this group. A lot of pieces to help me on my way. But there was

> still something missing. I think I was doing a lot of white

> knuckling. So even though I was acknowledging the emotions, I didn't

> know what to do with them. Sometimes sitting with the feeling is the

> right thing to do... but sometimes it's not.

>

> At any rate, with those pieces more or less assembled, I lost 45

> pounds. Got down to my lowest adult weight. And I kept it off for

> around two years. But... something still wasn't right. Something was

> too rigid--too inflexible. It's like when you put a piece in the

> wrong place, and it's close enough that it fits--but then when you

> see it's actually in the wrong place, you realize it's stuck. And

> not just that piece, but a whole bunch of nearby pieces. So you

> start ripping it apart... Not just the pieces that don't fit, but

> the pieces that do. And because the last stage of my puzzle was

> built on the idea of no excuses, I had obviously failed, so I might

> as well keep ripping it apart, right???

>

> The regain was slow at first. I was a little concerned, but not too

> much. Maybe it's just age, you know? I had hit 40--maybe it's the

> magic metabolism meltdown. But then I started a new job that totally

> threw me off balance--I gained 11 pounds in 6 months.

>

> You know how talks about inner alignment? At this point, ALL

> of me put on the breaks. The parts of me that were stressed by the

> job, the parts of me that enjoyed eating, the parts of me that were

> too tired to exercise, ALL of these parts had their positive intent--

> to make me feel better. And ALL of these parts suddenly woke up and

> realized that they were going about it the wrong way. Basically, I

> woke up one day thinking " I love myself too much to keep this up. "

>

> Ahem. VERY important piece to the puzzle, you know? Loving yourself.

> Too much? Try liking yourself. Or as a start, accepting yourself.

>

> I knew it was time for a change, but I also knew what I couldn't do.

> I couldn't do the 90-minute exercise sessions. I couldn't' do the

> meticulous calorie counting. I couldn't do the no excuses. I

> couldn't do the sneaking out of community events to eat at home,

> because I was afraid of " not quite perfect " food choices. Around

> that time, someone on one of my support teams (which had since moved

> to SparkPeople) mentioned IOWL for the second or third time. I was

> hooked from the prologue. And it didn't take too much longer to

> figure out a major piece that I had been missing.

>

> Forgiveness.

>

> Forgiving myself if I overate. (I was afraid of this at first. My

> experience with diet support groups left me too familiar with the

> confession mentality. " Oh, I overate, but it's OK, I forgive myself,

> tomorrow's another day. " ) Forgiving myself for being imperfect.

> Forgiving myself if I did well! (Yup. Weird, eh?) Forgiving others,

> whether they " deserved " it or not.

>

> There were a lot of other pieces as well--like using EFT to deal

> with emotional situations, instead of white-knuckling it. Like

> learning to enjoy hunger. (I didn't have hunger phobia--I had fear

> of low blood sugar phobia. When I was controlling my calories so

> tightly, I'd often crash before I registered hunger.) Like learning

> to identify fullness (I needed the Appetite Adjuster download for

> that). Oh, and let's not forget positive intent!! My life became so

> much easier when I could look at a situation where I felt like there

> was inner conflict and just say " what's the positive intent here? "

> Like, " why am I still sitting in front of the computer drinking my

> coffee when I had planned a nice long run? Oh! Because I really want

> a short, brisk walk! And if I keep sitting here, I won't have time

> for the long run. " Funny how often I'll jump up and exercise at that

> point, AND have time for something else, if I just look for the

> positive intent.

>

> OK, Eldred. At the end of the day, I don't know if this is any more

> helpful than a short, flip response. But these are a lot of the

> pieces I've picked up along the way. Do you have any/most/all of

> these pieces? Have you found ways to fit them into your life?

>

> Maybe it would help to actually list the pieces you have (whether

> you've managed to fit them together, or you just know you have them)?

>

> (who somehow forgot to mention gratitude, and the positive

> effects of regularly seeking out things we're grateful for....)

>

> >________________________________

> >

> >To: " insideoutweightloss "

<insideoutweightloss

> >

> >Sent: Thursday, February 23, 2012 7:15 PM

> >Subject: Re: Ready to figure if all out. But

> the pieces aren't connecting.

> >

> >

> >Heh. In that case, do what you can, and then make some replacement

> pieces!

> >

> >

> >

> >(Who actually just took Twana's analogy and ran with it... How are

> you doing, Twana??)

> >

> >

> >

> >>________________________________

> >>

> >>To: insideoutweightloss

> >>Sent: Wednesday, February 22, 2012 4:25 PM

> >>Subject: Re: Ready to figure if all out. But

> the pieces aren't connecting.

> >>

> >>

> >>

> >>...>

> >>

> >>No, you're not alone. Using 's jigsaw puzzle analogy - I think

> >>that someone has taken some of my pieces...

> >>

> >>Eldred

> >>--

>

>

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Posted
Posted

Maybe it's time to take another look at the picture on the box? What is it

you're trying to build?

Do you have a specific number on the scale you're aiming for?

Do you have a specific feeling you're aiming for?

Do you have a specific way you want to feel around food?

Maybe it's time to re-listen to some of the podcasts on dreaming.

What was going on in your life when you were in college? Were you excited by

your studies? Enjoying the social aspects? Doing activities that really jazzed

you? If you're not finding the missing pieces by looking at the present, maybe

contemplate the past.... Not in a woe is me, it's gone forever sort of way, but

in a what piece from that puzzle do I want to duplicate in the current puzzle

sort of way....

>________________________________

>

>To: insideoutweightloss

>Sent: Saturday, February 25, 2012 1:23 AM

>Subject: Re: Ready to figure if all out. But the pieces

aren't connecting.

>

>

> 

>...

>>

>> Maybe it would help to actually list the pieces you have (whether you've

managed to fit them together, or you just know you have them)?

>>

>> (who somehow forgot to mention gratitude, and the positive effects of

regularly seeking out things we're grateful for....)

>>

>>

>

>I don't know if I could logically say if I have any pieces. I mean, I

>know that to release weight, you need to burn more calories than you

>take in. That's simple math. Does saying that you need to eat less

>and move more mean you have any pieces of the puzzle? I actually

>*lost* weight when I went to college - dropped from 150 to about 135,

>and was in the best shape of my life. But I don't know what the

>positive intent of my behavior is. I don't remember when or why I

>started eating more than my body needed, but it was long after I

>dropped out of college.

>I don't see that I'm trying to 'punish' myself for sins, real or

>imagined. I'm just really puzzled. makes a LOT of sense, but I

>don't yet know how to fit that logic into my life...

>

>Eldred

>--

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Posted
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> Maybe it's time to take another look at the picture on the box? What is it

you're trying to build?

>

Ha! I love that way of looking at it...<g>

> Do you have a specific number on the scale you're aiming for?

I'd be happy at 170. I don't think 150 is attainable anymore.

> Do you have a specific feeling you're aiming for?

I don't know - confident enough to take my shirt off in public?

> Do you have a specific way you want to feel around food?

I don't really 'feel' anything around food. I know that I like

sweets, and I like fast food.

> Maybe it's time to re-listen to some of the podcasts on dreaming.

>

> What was going on in your life when you were in college? Were you excited by

your studies? Enjoying the social aspects? Doing activities that really jazzed

you? If you're not finding the missing pieces by looking at the present, maybe

contemplate the past.... Not in a woe is me, it's gone forever sort of way, but

in a what piece from that puzzle do I want to duplicate in the current puzzle

sort of way....

>

Actually, I didn't have much going on in college I wasn't a partier,

and I couldn't find a girlfriend. And I never applied myself enough

in my schoolwork. I went because my parents didn't give me another

option. Problem is, I dropped out after two years of bad grades. So,

I didn't take advantage of the opportunity they gave me. I was much

more active(thus going from 150lbs to 135lbs), simply because I was

walking or riding my bike everywhere I had to go. Most of my downtime

was watching TV, playing arcade games, or practicing my guitar.

Eldred

--

Raising money for Make-a-Wish!  Donation page at http://wam300.org

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Posted

,

Incredible post!!! As always you give me so much to think about. Thanks for

continuing to post such insightful pieces of wisdom.

Sent from my iPhone

> Hi Eldred,

>

> Sorry. My previous reply sounded really flippant. It falls in the category of

" true but not helpful. "

>

> Maybe it would be more helpful to go over my own path, looking for all the

pieces??

>

> My weight issues started around first grade. Judging by pictures before then,

I was pretty much normal size, but by the time I was 6 I was in " Pretty Plus " . I

wasn't huge--I think I was about the smallest you could be and still need fat

clothes.... My first official diet was the summer before 9th grade. It was

doctor supervised, a 1500 calorie plan put together for diabetic kids. It was

OK, but... boring. So this was my first piece--controlling intake.

>

> In college, my weight went up a lot, as I was suddenly exposed to a lot more

food--and no parents around to limit my intake. (Not that they were terribly

restrictive, but they were aware. And both had food issues.) But I also had a

lot more opportunities for physical activity. It was so easy to go to the pool,

or go to the gym, or take a fitness class, or run..... So here was my next

piece--activity.

>

> By the time I was 24, I was at my heaviest. Probably around 190. Not that

numbers matter that much.... For some reason, things aligned in such a way that

I knew I wanted to lose weight. So I put together the two pieces I knew

about--calorie counting and exercise--and lost quite successfully. I knew I was

an emotional eater, but at the time I just figured that was my identity. It

didn't occur to me that it was something I could change.

>

> I got down to a pretty healthy weight. I didn't feel thin, but I didn't feel

fat. Didn't feel like I needed to hate myself. I actually managed to maintain

the loss for several years--even after my pregnancy with twins, I got down to my

pre-pregnancy weight fairly quickly. The regain didn't really start until the

girls were around 2-3. It was a long, slow process, getting back up almost to

what my heaviest weight had been. I had toyed a little with diets along the way,

but nothing really lasted more than a month. (I eventually identified that as

another piece, but not one that you need for your puzzle, Eldred... I had to

learn how to factor monthly variations into whatever plan I tried if I wanted it

to work long term.)

>

> One of my attempts was with a commercial diet site. It helped having a set

menu. I knew what to do; I didn't have to think. I knew they had support forums,

but I wasn't willing to try the first time around. But when I hit that

desperation point--when I knew I'd have to replace my jeans that were coming

apart at the seams, but I couldn't face a bigger size--I figured what could it

hurt? Might as well see if group support will get me anywhere. So there you

go--finding support was another very big piece.

>

> I found a few very good teams. I learned even more about calories--you might

say I found more pieces there as I learned about tracking macro nutrients, not

just calories, I learned more about various food allergies or sensitivities and

how they can play a role, and I learned just how much easier it could be to take

things like sugar out of your diet. I was exposed to so many more ideas for

exercise--different types of dance, yoga, running.... I went back to running

after a long break, and remembered why I liked it so much. I learned just how

important it was to have a place to turn when you don't know... where to turn.

The support was soooooo important--I think it was like not just finding some

missing pieces, it was like having someone give me a quarter of the puzzle

already put together.

>

> Another huge piece of the puzzle that I found through the support was the idea

that yes, in fact, emotional eating can be addressed. That it is possible to

learn how to NOT eat just because sometimes life sucks. A lot. My biggest

support group at the time was very into no excuses--which at the time was good

for me. It made me face the emotions with my mouth closed.... I got a lot of

tools out of this group. A lot of pieces to help me on my way. But there was

still something missing. I think I was doing a lot of white knuckling. So even

though I was acknowledging the emotions, I didn't know what to do with them.

Sometimes sitting with the feeling is the right thing to do... but sometimes

it's not.

>

> At any rate, with those pieces more or less assembled, I lost 45 pounds. Got

down to my lowest adult weight. And I kept it off for around two years. But...

something still wasn't right. Something was too rigid--too inflexible. It's like

when you put a piece in the wrong place, and it's close enough that it fits--but

then when you see it's actually in the wrong place, you realize it's stuck. And

not just that piece, but a whole bunch of nearby pieces. So you start ripping it

apart... Not just the pieces that don't fit, but the pieces that do. And because

the last stage of my puzzle was built on the idea of no excuses, I had obviously

failed, so I might as well keep ripping it apart, right???

>

> The regain was slow at first. I was a little concerned, but not too much.

Maybe it's just age, you know? I had hit 40--maybe it's the magic metabolism

meltdown. But then I started a new job that totally threw me off balance--I

gained 11 pounds in 6 months.

>

> You know how talks about inner alignment? At this point, ALL of me put

on the breaks. The parts of me that were stressed by the job, the parts of me

that enjoyed eating, the parts of me that were too tired to exercise, ALL of

these parts had their positive intent--to make me feel better. And ALL of these

parts suddenly woke up and realized that they were going about it the wrong way.

Basically, I woke up one day thinking " I love myself too much to keep this up. "

>

> Ahem. VERY important piece to the puzzle, you know? Loving yourself. Too much?

Try liking yourself. Or as a start, accepting yourself.

>

> I knew it was time for a change, but I also knew what I couldn't do. I

couldn't do the 90-minute exercise sessions. I couldn't' do the meticulous

calorie counting. I couldn't do the no excuses. I couldn't do the sneaking out

of community events to eat at home, because I was afraid of " not quite perfect "

food choices. Around that time, someone on one of my support teams (which had

since moved to SparkPeople) mentioned IOWL for the second or third time. I was

hooked from the prologue. And it didn't take too much longer to figure out a

major piece that I had been missing.

>

> Forgiveness.

>

> Forgiving myself if I overate. (I was afraid of this at first. My experience

with diet support groups left me too familiar with the confession mentality.

" Oh, I overate, but it's OK, I forgive myself, tomorrow's another day. " )

Forgiving myself for being imperfect. Forgiving myself if I did well! (Yup.

Weird, eh?) Forgiving others, whether they " deserved " it or not.

>

> There were a lot of other pieces as well--like using EFT to deal with

emotional situations, instead of white-knuckling it. Like learning to enjoy

hunger. (I didn't have hunger phobia--I had fear of low blood sugar phobia. When

I was controlling my calories so tightly, I'd often crash before I registered

hunger.) Like learning to identify fullness (I needed the Appetite Adjuster

download for that). Oh, and let's not forget positive intent!! My life became so

much easier when I could look at a situation where I felt like there was inner

conflict and just say " what's the positive intent here? " Like, " why am I still

sitting in front of the computer drinking my coffee when I had planned a nice

long run? Oh! Because I really want a short, brisk walk! And if I keep sitting

here, I won't have time for the long run. " Funny how often I'll jump up and

exercise at that point, AND have time for something else, if I just look for the

positive intent.

>

> OK, Eldred. At the end of the day, I don't know if this is any more helpful

than a short, flip response. But these are a lot of the pieces I've picked up

along the way. Do you have any/most/all of these pieces? Have you found ways to

fit them into your life?

>

> Maybe it would help to actually list the pieces you have (whether you've

managed to fit them together, or you just know you have them)?

>

> (who somehow forgot to mention gratitude, and the positive effects of

regularly seeking out things we're grateful for....)

>

> >________________________________

> >

> >To: " insideoutweightloss "

<insideoutweightloss >

> >Sent: Thursday, February 23, 2012 7:15 PM

> >Subject: Re: Ready to figure if all out. But the pieces

aren't connecting.

> >

> >

> >Heh. In that case, do what you can, and then make some replacement pieces!

> >

> >

> >

> >(Who actually just took Twana's analogy and ran with it... How are you doing,

Twana??)

> >

> >

> >

> >>________________________________

> >>

> >>To: insideoutweightloss

> >>Sent: Wednesday, February 22, 2012 4:25 PM

> >>Subject: Re: Ready to figure if all out. But the

pieces aren't connecting.

> >>

> >>

> >>

> >>...>

> >>

> >>No, you're not alone. Using 's jigsaw puzzle analogy - I think

> >>that someone has taken some of my pieces...

> >>

> >>Eldred

> >>--

>

>

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Posted
Posted

Thanks for sharing this . I have a lot of anger towards my ex husband,

particularly about how he treated and continues to treat our children. I'm going

to check this out. (Not sure I've even said this out loud to anyone)!

Kim

________________________________

To: insideoutweightloss

Sent: Saturday, February 25, 2012 7:21 AM

Subject: Re: Ready to figure if all out. But the pieces

aren't connecting.

Hi :

Forgiveness has been a big part of my journey and I was really helped 

by the book Radical Forgiveness by Colin Tipping.  He has a website: 

http://www.radicalforgiveness.com

  and there is a free worksheet that helps you through the process. 

If you scroll down to Support and Free Downloads then go to the 

Radical Forgiveness worksheet you can download it and print it out and 

use it whenever you need to forgive somebody.  Essentially his message 

is that each situation is a gift to learn something about ourselves. 

It's free and incredibly freeing!!  There is also a free worksheet for 

self-forgiveness as well.  Anybody need that around here?  : )

Peace, love, beaches,

>

>

> Wow ...This really spoke to me!  I think the piece that 

> resonated the most with me was the part about the " forgiveness "  

> piece.  I know it is an important piece that would make a huge 

> difference for me if I could just pick it up more often.  However, I 

> think it falls on the floor, gets kicked under the couch and I just 

> can't seem to find it.  I really like the analogy of the puzzle 

> pieces. 

>

>

>

> Subject: Re: Ready to figure if all out. But 

> the pieces aren't connecting.

> To: " insideoutweightloss " <insideoutweightloss

> >

> Date: Friday, February 24, 2012, 5:20 AM

>

>

>

> Hi Eldred,

>

> Sorry. My previous reply sounded really flippant. It falls in the 

> category of " true but not helpful. "

>

> Maybe it would be more helpful to go over my own path, looking for 

> all the pieces??

>

> My weight issues started around first grade. Judging by pictures 

> before then, I was pretty much normal size, but by the time I was 6 

> I was in " Pretty Plus " . I wasn't huge--I think I was about the 

> smallest you could be and still need fat clothes.... My first 

> official diet was the summer before 9th grade. It was doctor 

> supervised, a 1500 calorie plan put together for diabetic kids. It 

> was OK, but... boring. So this was my first piece--controlling intake.

>

> In college, my weight went up a lot, as I was suddenly exposed to a 

> lot more food--and no parents around to limit my intake. (Not that 

> they were terribly restrictive, but they were aware. And both had 

> food issues.) But I also had a lot more opportunities for physical 

> activity. It was so easy to go to the pool, or go to the gym, or 

> take a fitness class, or run..... So here was my next piece--activity.

>

> By the time I was 24, I was at my heaviest. Probably around 190. Not 

> that numbers matter that much.... For some reason, things aligned in 

> such a way that I knew I wanted to lose weight. So I put together 

> the two pieces I knew about--calorie counting and exercise--and lost 

> quite successfully. I knew I was an emotional eater, but at the time 

> I just figured that was my identity. It didn't occur to me that it 

> was something I could change.

>

> I got down to a pretty healthy weight. I didn't feel thin, but I 

> didn't feel fat. Didn't feel like I needed to hate myself. I 

> actually managed to maintain the loss for several years--even after 

> my pregnancy with twins, I got down to my pre-pregnancy weight 

> fairly quickly. The regain didn't really start until the girls were 

> around 2-3. It was a long, slow process, getting back up almost to 

> what my heaviest weight had been. I had toyed a little with diets 

> along the way, but nothing really lasted more than a month. (I 

> eventually identified that as another piece, but not one that you 

> need for your puzzle, Eldred... I had to learn how to factor monthly 

> variations into whatever plan I tried if I wanted it to work long 

> term.)

>

> One of my attempts was with a commercial diet site. It helped having 

> a set menu. I knew what to do; I didn't have to think. I knew they 

> had support forums, but I wasn't willing to try the first time 

> around. But when I hit that desperation point--when I knew I'd have 

> to replace my jeans that were coming apart at the seams, but I 

> couldn't face a bigger size--I figured what could it hurt? Might as 

> well see if group support will get me anywhere. So there you go--

> finding support was another very big piece.

>

> I found a few very good teams. I learned even more about calories--

> you might say I found more pieces there as I learned about tracking 

> macro nutrients, not just calories, I learned more about various 

> food allergies or sensitivities and how they can play a role, and I 

> learned just how much easier it could be to take things like sugar 

> out of your diet. I was exposed to so many more ideas for exercise--

> different types of dance, yoga, running.... I went back to running 

> after a long break, and remembered why I liked it so much. I learned 

> just how important it was to have a place to turn when you don't 

> know... where to turn. The support was soooooo important--I think it 

> was like not just finding some missing pieces, it was like having 

> someone give me a quarter of the puzzle already put together.

>

> Another huge piece of the puzzle that I found through the support 

> was the idea that yes, in fact, emotional eating can be addressed. 

> That it is possible to learn how to NOT eat just because sometimes 

> life sucks. A lot. My biggest support group at the time was very 

> into no excuses--which at the time was good for me. It made me face 

> the emotions with my mouth closed.... I got a lot of tools out of 

> this group. A lot of pieces to help me on my way. But there was 

> still something missing. I think I was doing a lot of white 

> knuckling. So even though I was acknowledging the emotions, I didn't 

> know what to do with them. Sometimes sitting with the feeling is the 

> right thing to do... but sometimes it's not.

>

> At any rate, with those pieces more or less assembled, I lost 45 

> pounds. Got down to my lowest adult weight. And I kept it off for 

> around two years. But... something still wasn't right. Something was 

> too rigid--too inflexible. It's like when you put a piece in the 

> wrong place, and it's close enough that it fits--but then when you 

> see it's actually in the wrong place, you realize it's stuck. And 

> not just that piece, but a whole bunch of nearby pieces. So you 

> start ripping it apart... Not just the pieces that don't fit, but 

> the pieces that do. And because the last stage of my puzzle was 

> built on the idea of no excuses, I had obviously failed, so I might 

> as well keep ripping it apart, right???

>

> The regain was slow at first. I was a little concerned, but not too 

> much. Maybe it's just age, you know? I had hit 40--maybe it's the 

> magic metabolism meltdown. But then I started a new job that totally 

> threw me off balance--I gained 11 pounds in 6 months.

>

> You know how talks about inner alignment? At this point, ALL 

> of me put on the breaks. The parts of me that were stressed by the 

> job, the parts of me that enjoyed eating, the parts of me that were 

> too tired to exercise, ALL of these parts had their positive intent--

> to make me feel better. And ALL of these parts suddenly woke up and 

> realized that they were going about it the wrong way. Basically, I 

> woke up one day thinking " I love myself too much to keep this up. "

>

> Ahem. VERY important piece to the puzzle, you know? Loving yourself. 

> Too much? Try liking yourself. Or as a start, accepting yourself.

>

> I knew it was time for a change, but I also knew what I couldn't do. 

> I couldn't do the 90-minute exercise sessions. I couldn't' do the 

> meticulous calorie counting. I couldn't do the no excuses. I 

> couldn't do the sneaking out of community events to eat at home, 

> because I was afraid of " not quite perfect " food choices. Around 

> that time, someone on one of my support teams (which had since moved 

> to SparkPeople) mentioned IOWL for the second or third time. I was 

> hooked from the prologue. And it didn't take too much longer to 

> figure out a major piece that I had been missing.

>

> Forgiveness.

>

> Forgiving myself if I overate. (I was afraid of this at first. My 

> experience with diet support groups left me too familiar with the 

> confession mentality. " Oh, I overate, but it's OK, I forgive myself, 

> tomorrow's another day. " ) Forgiving myself for being imperfect. 

> Forgiving myself if I did well! (Yup. Weird, eh?) Forgiving others, 

> whether they " deserved " it or not.

>

> There were a lot of other pieces as well--like using EFT to deal 

> with emotional situations, instead of white-knuckling it. Like 

> learning to enjoy hunger. (I didn't have hunger phobia--I had fear 

> of low blood sugar phobia. When I was controlling my calories so 

> tightly, I'd often crash before I registered hunger.) Like learning 

> to identify fullness (I needed the Appetite Adjuster download for 

> that). Oh, and let's not forget positive intent!! My life became so 

> much easier when I could look at a situation where I felt like there 

> was inner conflict and just say " what's the positive intent here? "  

> Like, " why am I still sitting in front of the computer drinking my 

> coffee when I had planned a nice long run? Oh! Because I really want 

> a short, brisk walk! And if I keep sitting here, I won't have time 

> for the long run. " Funny how often I'll jump up and exercise at that 

> point, AND have time for something else, if I just look for the 

> positive intent.

>

> OK, Eldred. At the end of the day, I don't know if this is any more 

> helpful than a short, flip response. But these are a lot of the 

> pieces I've picked up along the way. Do you have any/most/all of 

> these pieces? Have you found ways to fit them into your life?

>

> Maybe it would help to actually list the pieces you have (whether 

> you've managed to fit them together, or you just know you have them)?

>

> (who somehow forgot to mention gratitude, and the positive 

> effects of regularly seeking out things we're grateful for....)

>

> >________________________________

> >

> >To: " insideoutweightloss "

<insideoutweightloss

> >

> >Sent: Thursday, February 23, 2012 7:15 PM

> >Subject: Re: Ready to figure if all out. But 

> the pieces aren't connecting.

> >

> >

> >Heh. In that case, do what you can, and then make some replacement 

> pieces!

> >

> >

> >

> >(Who actually just took Twana's analogy and ran with it... How are 

> you doing, Twana??)

> >

> >

> >

> >>________________________________

> >>

> >>To: insideoutweightloss

> >>Sent: Wednesday, February 22, 2012 4:25 PM

> >>Subject: Re: Ready to figure if all out. But 

> the pieces aren't connecting.

> >>

> >>

> >>

> >>...>

> >>

> >>No, you're not alone. Using 's jigsaw puzzle analogy - I think

> >>that someone has taken some of my pieces...

> >>

> >>Eldred

> >>--

>

>

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Posted
Posted

Aw, thanks....

>________________________________

>

>To: insideoutweightloss

>Sent: Sunday, February 26, 2012 5:41 AM

>Subject: Re: Ready to figure if all out. But the pieces

aren't connecting.

>

>

> 

>

>> ,

>> Incredible post!!! As always you give me so much to think about. Thanks for

continuing to post such insightful pieces of wisdom.

>>

>

>Some people just have a GIFT...

>

>Eldred

>--

>Raising money for Make-a-Wish!  Donation page at http://wam300.org

>

>

>

>

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Posted
Posted

Thanks ! I have really worked on forgiveness for others because I was

hanging on to some big time resentments. I have been successful there. It is

the self-forgiveness that I struggle with the most. I'll check out the

web-site! Thanks, :-)

Ford, CPhT

340B Coordinator

Mercy Hospital Springfield

Pharmacy Services

1235 E. Cherokee|Springfield, MO.  65804

Office: |Fax:

linda.ford@...

" Sometimes God allows us to see the miracle. Sometimes God allows us to BE the

miracle. "

Mercy.... One of the Nation's Top Integrated Health Systems

Re: Ready to figure if all out. But

> the pieces aren't connecting.

> >>

> >>

> >>

> >>...>

> >>

> >>No, you're not alone. Using 's jigsaw puzzle analogy - I think

> >>that someone has taken some of my pieces...

> >>

> >>Eldred

> >>--

>

>

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