Re: I feel liek a terrible person.

[Guest guest]

That's going to be one of your limiting beliefs to work on. Good job

identifying it! Don't be sad, it's good that you identified it. Don't let

this hold you back. Keep in mind that just because she is slender doesn't

mean that she has no problems. Chances are, she has her own set of issues

that cause her to behave in this manner.

This isn't something terrible about yourself. It's just a limiting belief.

We all have them or we wouldn't be here.

::hugs::

> **

>

>

> I just realized something terrible about myself. I have a friend who is

> very skinny (not gorgeous, but she IS skinny, bubbly, flirty and a little

> easy) and every time I refer to her while talking to my husband or family I

> really talk bad about her. I don't exactly say bad things about HER per se,

> but I talk really horribly about " skinny, flirty, slutty girls " in

> general(but I know I am referring to her, even though I don't say her

> name).

>

> I am not like that. I study, I work, I'm fairly intelligent and what you

> would call a " good girl " . My husband like the " good girl " he sees in me a

> great future mother and he knows I'm a good wife. So when I was going

> through my objections I realized that I unconsciously related being slim to

> being like her and her friends. She doesn't go to school, even though she

> can; she has a mediocre job, she dresses inappropriately, is irresponsible

> and flirts with any guy she sees.

>

> I thought, if I were to become slim I would become her!

>

> I'm really sad now.

>

>

>

--

Amelia Ramstead

http://www.linkedin.com/pub/amelia-ramstead/2b/25b/601

http://www.ameeramstead.com

http://ameliaramstead.blogspot.com

www.twitter.com/ameliaramstead

[Guest guest]

Maki

Knowledge is power! You know yourself better today than yesterday! Celebrate

that! Try to think of a thin person who embodies the qualities you admire, and

tell yourself that you will be like THAT. If you are doing the FF book, you will

envision your dream body. Use what you learned to dream up a body you will be

proud to inhabit!

 

I'm a terrible person, too. I was raised by a mother who taught us that fat

people were lazy, ugly and stupid. Funny thing--she was at least 75 lbs.

overweight herself!! I swore I would never be like her and be judgemental and

let myself gain too much weight, but guess what? I am 50 lbs overweight and find

myself harshly judging people who are also overweight. With 's help, I am

getting better and hushing the little voice that echoes my mom's words. I know

that I'm not ugly or stupid, but I do sooo have to work on the lazy part!

 

Anyway, we all are " terrible " at times, but, as adults, we have to adjust our

thought patterns to help us lead saner, healthier lives.

Marcia

________________________________

To: insideoutweightloss

Sent: Monday, January 23, 2012 12:24 PM

Subject: I feel liek a terrible person.

 

I just realized something terrible about myself. I have a friend who is very

skinny (not gorgeous, but she IS skinny, bubbly, flirty and a little easy) and

every time I refer to her while talking to my husband or family I really talk

bad about her. I don't exactly say bad things about HER per se, but I talk

really horribly about " skinny, flirty, slutty girls " in general(but I know I am

referring to her, even though I don't say her name).

I am not like that. I study, I work, I'm fairly intelligent and what you would

call a " good girl " . My husband like the " good girl " he sees in me a great future

mother and he knows I'm a good wife. So when I was going through my objections I

realized that I unconsciously related being slim to being like her and her

friends. She doesn't go to school, even though she can; she has a mediocre job,

she dresses inappropriately, is irresponsible and flirts with any guy she sees.

I thought, if I were to become slim I would become her!

I'm really sad now.

[Guest guest]

Hi Maki:

Two of my favorite quotes:

" Knowledge is Power " and " The Truth will set you free but first it

will make you miserable. "

You just uncovered a HUGE Limiting Belief that you can work on and

change. Bravo!

Peace, love, beaches,

> I just realized something terrible about myself. I have a friend who

> is very skinny (not gorgeous, but she IS skinny, bubbly, flirty and

> a little easy) and every time I refer to her while talking to my

> husband or family I really talk bad about her. I don't exactly say

> bad things about HER per se, but I talk really horribly about

> " skinny, flirty, slutty girls " in general(but I know I am referring

> to her, even though I don't say her name).

>

> I am not like that. I study, I work, I'm fairly intelligent and what

> you would call a " good girl " . My husband like the " good girl " he

> sees in me a great future mother and he knows I'm a good wife. So

> when I was going through my objections I realized that I

> unconsciously related being slim to being like her and her friends.

> She doesn't go to school, even though she can; she has a mediocre

> job, she dresses inappropriately, is irresponsible and flirts with

> any guy she sees.

>

> I thought, if I were to become slim I would become her!

>

> I'm really sad now.

>

>

[Guest guest]

Thank you, . You are so right.

I don't know how to turn this around though. I think I will try to look at

skinny friends whom I admire. I think this would probably change my fear of

becoming a thin airhead.

Maki

>

> > I just realized something terrible about myself. I have a friend who

> > is very skinny (not gorgeous, but she IS skinny, bubbly, flirty and

> > a little easy) and every time I refer to her while talking to my

> > husband or family I really talk bad about her. I don't exactly say

> > bad things about HER per se, but I talk really horribly about

> > " skinny, flirty, slutty girls " in general(but I know I am referring

> > to her, even though I don't say her name).

> >

> > I am not like that. I study, I work, I'm fairly intelligent and what

> > you would call a " good girl " . My husband like the " good girl " he

> > sees in me a great future mother and he knows I'm a good wife. So

> > when I was going through my objections I realized that I

> > unconsciously related being slim to being like her and her friends.

> > She doesn't go to school, even though she can; she has a mediocre

> > job, she dresses inappropriately, is irresponsible and flirts with

> > any guy she sees.

> >

> > I thought, if I were to become slim I would become her!

> >

> > I'm really sad now.

> >

> >

>

>

>

>

[Guest guest]

Don't be sad Maki.. You've had an AHA moment and you have the power to change

your thinking and talking from here forward! Maybe, just maybe... there is a

part of you that is envious about some of the characteristics of your friend.

Maybe it isn't what she does exactly, but rather the result - like how she gets

attention. Maybe one of your core issues isn't getting enough kudos or attention

for yourself. Maybe you'd like to have those benefits, but not how she goes

about getting it. Your positive motivation may be how you can get the results

your way, with your personality and positive traits.

Thanks for sharing!!

Judy

[Guest guest]

Oh, and one more thing!!! NONE of us are terrible!! We are beautiful and

handsome (for Carlton) and perfect just the way we are! We may want to change

some things for the better, but we are wonderful!! All of us.... TODAY - NOW!

>

> ________________________

[Guest guest]

Thank you Amelia and Marcia for your support. I will do exactly as you have

recommended. No wonder I wasn't getting anywhere, I literally hated thin people.

How could I dream of myself becoming one. I read it and I almost can't believe

it. This was my attitude towards thin people. Now that I think about it further,

I was keeping myself from being friends with anyone who was thin! Wow! I love

this. For months and months I kept going through the guided journey where I

would dream of me being thin and I just couldn't come up with an image.

I feel so much better now. Thank you!!

>

>

>

>

> Maki

> Knowledge is power! You know yourself better today than yesterday! Celebrate

that! Try to think of a thin person who embodies the qualities you admire, and

tell yourself that you will be like THAT. If you are doing the FF book, you will

envision your dream body. Use what you learned to dream up a body you will be

proud to inhabit!

>  

> I'm a terrible person, too. I was raised by a mother who taught us that fat

people were lazy, ugly and stupid. Funny thing--she was at least 75 lbs.

overweight herself!! I swore I would never be like her and be judgemental and

let myself gain too much weight, but guess what? I am 50 lbs overweight and find

myself harshly judging people who are also overweight. With 's help, I am

getting better and hushing the little voice that echoes my mom's words. I know

that I'm not ugly or stupid, but I do sooo have to work on the lazy part!

>  

> Anyway, we all are " terrible " at times, but, as adults, we have to adjust our

thought patterns to help us lead saner, healthier lives.

> Marcia

>

> ________________________________

>

> To: insideoutweightloss

> Sent: Monday, January 23, 2012 12:24 PM

> Subject: I feel liek a terrible person.

>

>

>

>  

>

> I just realized something terrible about myself. I have a friend who is very

skinny (not gorgeous, but she IS skinny, bubbly, flirty and a little easy) and

every time I refer to her while talking to my husband or family I really talk

bad about her. I don't exactly say bad things about HER per se, but I talk

really horribly about " skinny, flirty, slutty girls " in general(but I know I am

referring to her, even though I don't say her name).

>

> I am not like that. I study, I work, I'm fairly intelligent and what you would

call a " good girl " . My husband like the " good girl " he sees in me a great future

mother and he knows I'm a good wife. So when I was going through my objections I

realized that I unconsciously related being slim to being like her and her

friends. She doesn't go to school, even though she can; she has a mediocre job,

she dresses inappropriately, is irresponsible and flirts with any guy she sees.

>

> I thought, if I were to become slim I would become her!

>

> I'm really sad now.

>

>

>

>

>

[Guest guest]

You know what, Judy? I just realized losing weight has been my MAIN concern in

life. Always trying, always, trying. Most of the other aspects of my life are

kept " under control " . So my life revolved around weight loss. I guess my friend

is so carefree about everything that I truly envy her. Who would have thought? I

want to be free.

Yes, I want to be free from the struggle. I want to enjoy life without always

thinking about losing weight.

Thank You!!!

[Guest guest]

>

> I have come to realize that I have a problem with wealth. Perhaps the reason I

have always struggled to make ends meet and have never been financially secure

is in my head. I have had a bad attitude towards wealthy people. How could I

become even modestly financially successful if I hate rich folks? Got some work

to do here on stuff I had not thought of before.

>

>

That seems to be a common opinion in this country - " Rich people are evil and

must be punished for being successful. " Is it any wonder we're headed towards a

socialist/communist model?(redistribution of wealth)?

Eldred

[Guest guest]

Eldred - really? That is interesting. Canada is more socialist.. it

ain't so bad here.. but it ain't so grand either.

But the rich shouldn't be paying less % in taxes than the not-as-rich.

[Guest guest]

>

> Eldred - really? That is interesting. Canada is more socialist.. it

> ain't so bad here.. but it ain't so grand either.

>

> But the rich shouldn't be paying less % in taxes than the not-as-rich.

>

>

I would be ok with a 'flat tax'. Everyone pays 5%(or 10%, whatever), across the

board. No deductions. If you make $100K, you pay $10K in tax. If you make

$20K, you pay $2K.

Problem is, that $2K is likely more critical to that family's survival than that

$10K to the more wealthy family...

Eldred