Guest guest Posted February 26, 2012 Report Share Posted February 26, 2012 Great insight . I would set a daily goal for yourself and compete with yourself if you decide to do it. Now, if this was me I'd set a daily goal and beat myself up on days I didn't make it so.....I don't know if you feel that way or not. You could also do it on your own and not join the challenge. ________________________________ To: IOWL <insideoutweightloss > Sent: Sunday, February 26, 2012 2:12 PM Subject: Resistance....  So at work, they've just announced one of these contests where everyone wears pedometers, and there are teams competing against each other, and on each team there's a prize for the person who has the biggest increase in the number of steps. Part of me thinks " gee, what a great way to make sure I'm getting in a little extra walking, now that my treadmill bit the dust. " Part of me wants to run away screaming. I do not deal well with competition. I do not like the way I feel if I'm trying to win. I don't like the feeling that if I'm trying to win, I'm trying to make someone else lose. That's not... nice.... And oh, how I do not like to lose. When I was in junior high, I was on a chess team. There were a couple of matches where our team won because of my game. Not because I won... but because I was a master at the stalemate. It was the perfect solution, ya know? I didn't win--but I didn't lose. But this is not actually the goal in chess.... So... I quit playing. I didn't win. I didn't lose. But I didn't DO, either. I'm not sure what I want to do about this feeling, besides sit with the discomfort. Maybe it's time to face the feelings about competition. At the end of the day, that'll probably do me more good than the extra steps.... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted February 26, 2012 Report Share Posted February 26, 2012 It is great insight! One of the wonderful things about the program is all the side effects - learning about yourself. I'm not sure it matters whether or not you do the contest - just do exactly what you are doing, which is noticing your reactions/habits and discovering what's behind them - then decide if you want to change it. That's what the program is all about. At least for me. :-) Good luck! Sian > ** > > > Great insight . I would set a daily goal for yourself and compete with > yourself if you decide to do it. Now, if this was me I'd set a daily goal > and beat myself up on days I didn't make it so.....I don't know if you feel > that way or not. You could also do it on your own and not join the > challenge. > > ________________________________ > > To: IOWL <insideoutweightloss > > Sent: Sunday, February 26, 2012 2:12 PM > Subject: Resistance.... > > > > > So at work, they've just announced one of these contests where everyone > wears pedometers, and there are teams competing against each other, and on > each team there's a prize for the person who has the biggest increase in > the number of steps. > > Part of me thinks " gee, what a great way to make sure I'm getting in a > little extra walking, now that my treadmill bit the dust. " > > Part of me wants to run away screaming. > > I do not deal well with competition. > > I do not like the way I feel if I'm trying to win. I don't like the > feeling that if I'm trying to win, I'm trying to make someone else lose. > That's not... nice.... And oh, how I do not like to lose. > > When I was in junior high, I was on a chess team. There were a couple of > matches where our team won because of my game. Not because I won... but > because I was a master at the stalemate. It was the perfect solution, ya > know? I didn't win--but I didn't lose. > > But this is not actually the goal in chess.... > > So... I quit playing. I didn't win. I didn't lose. But I didn't DO, either. > > I'm not sure what I want to do about this feeling, besides sit with the > discomfort. Maybe it's time to face the feelings about competition. At the > end of the day, that'll probably do me more good than the extra steps.... > > > > Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted February 27, 2012 Report Share Posted February 27, 2012 Thanks so much for sharing this. I totally relate to what you're saying! I play tennis and even though I have a passion for the game I often feel like it's " not fair " for me to win...especially if the other person is a worse player than me. You cannot imagine how many times I've been way ahead and have gone on to lose the match.I was better than the other player but I've often felt like that.. " I didn't win but I didn't lose cause I'm a better player " but I didn't fight hard enough to win so I did lose. However, in doubles I fight like a bear because I want to play well and win for my teammate but ....not for me??  And I find that it's like that in so many areas of my life. As soon as something becomes a " contest " or a " competition " as far as I'm concerned, I get flustered and do terribly but if it's a team effort I'm going to give my very best. I just never realised it till I read your post. And I'm wondering how much this applies to my weight loss struggle. Giving up before I've even tried....not even really giving it a chance so that I'm doomed to lose before I've even started.... This has definitely given me something to think about!! ________________________________ To: IOWL <insideoutweightloss > Sent: Sunday, February 26, 2012 10:12 PM Subject: Resistance....  So at work, they've just announced one of these contests where everyone wears pedometers, and there are teams competing against each other, and on each team there's a prize for the person who has the biggest increase in the number of steps. Part of me thinks " gee, what a great way to make sure I'm getting in a little extra walking, now that my treadmill bit the dust. " Part of me wants to run away screaming. I do not deal well with competition. I do not like the way I feel if I'm trying to win. I don't like the feeling that if I'm trying to win, I'm trying to make someone else lose. That's not... nice.... And oh, how I do not like to lose. When I was in junior high, I was on a chess team. There were a couple of matches where our team won because of my game. Not because I won... but because I was a master at the stalemate. It was the perfect solution, ya know? I didn't win--but I didn't lose. But this is not actually the goal in chess.... So... I quit playing. I didn't win. I didn't lose. But I didn't DO, either. I'm not sure what I want to do about this feeling, besides sit with the discomfort. Maybe it's time to face the feelings about competition. At the end of the day, that'll probably do me more good than the extra steps.... Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted February 27, 2012 Report Share Posted February 27, 2012 , Is there any way to say " thanks but no thanks " ? I have a paleo diet at my gym right now and they wanted a goal.. They were looking for a # of lbs to lose.. Well, they posted a picture of all of us watching the box owner speak about the subject.. and there I was sitting with an extra spare tire (I have a lot of weight to lose, so I have 2 tires.. Yay me!) and I said I wanted the top one to go. maybe it'll make me not win the challenge.. I don't care.. I don't like to have a specific carrot in front of me - it makes me not lose! But losing the spare tire.. that I can focus on. If it doesn't work for you.. try to reframe it in your head to a way it does.. if that doesn't work, then say thanks but no thanks. Corinna Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
Guest guest Posted February 27, 2012 Report Share Posted February 27, 2012 Geez Corinna - I'm surprised at your box / gym! we've had two people not lose a pound on our last challenge yet lose a size (the combo of losing the same poundage of fat as they gained in muscle). I'm not saying that's me (I know that I will need to lose weight before I'll ever start looking " cross fit " !) but the paleo diet challenge we have going is based on inches lost and strength gains -- they even ask us NOT to weight. I " m with you when it comes to a 'goal' ... it's a disincentive to me to set something like that (my contrary self, my subconscious seems to have a lot of say in that matter!). I'm not going to win our boxes contest, but I know I'll place in second or third when it comes to female strength gains as it has made a difference. I'd just like to get my head around the 'number' thing and not have the scale be something that drives me in the opposite direction! ________________________________ To: insideoutweightloss Sent: Monday, February 27, 2012 1:02 PM Subject: Re: Resistance....  , Is there any way to say " thanks but no thanks " ? I have a paleo diet at my gym right now and they wanted a goal.. They were looking for a # of lbs to lose.. Well, they posted a picture of all of us watching the box owner speak about the subject.. and there I was sitting with an extra spare tire (I have a lot of weight to lose, so I have 2 tires.. Yay me!) and I said I wanted the top one to go. maybe it'll make me not win the challenge.. I don't care.. I don't like to have a specific carrot in front of me - it makes me not lose! But losing the spare tire.. that I can focus on. If it doesn't work for you.. try to reframe it in your head to a way it does.. if that doesn't work, then say thanks but no thanks. Corinna Quote Link to comment Share on other sites More sharing options...
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