Re: Re: Leaving the comfort zone

[Guest guest]

Thanks Miriam,

that was a very compassionate post that gave me things to think about and

gave me a feeling of great support.

> **

>

>

> Dear Jenna ,

> Thank you for sharing.

> I am sorry to hear you are under so much stress and challenges.

> How can we support you , here on this forum?!

>

I don't know. No one has specifically asked me that before. My husband

suggests good things for me to do and is very suportive and my mother and

brother care lots and show that they worry but no one has directly asked

what would help. Listenin' without judgement would be good, and sharing

other stories so I feel part of a supportive community.

> From your story - overeating must be such a gift for you - comfort and

> relaxation.

>

Actually no ... I have been eating to the point of pain, using food to

cover up emotions. When I binge its very rarely pleasurable. Maybe the

first few mouthfuls but after that its not fun.

> Gratitude for the part that makes you overeat and forgiveness to yourself,

> might help.

>

Mmm, definitely forgiveness. I have been very grateful for this habit, as I

said before I saw it as protecting me from worse self abuse. When I

practiced awareness of loving myself I would thank my strong body for all

it has achieved and see my bulges in particular as being part of my

protection.

> For me , food is my refuge when I get very depressed. I really know the

> feeling - that food is better than alcohol or hurting my self in another

> way.

>

I am sorry to hear of your depression. Is this a big part of your life now?

Can this group/can I help you? I have lived with some periods of clinical

depression myself and my OH has bipolar which was undiagnosed for years so

I have an inkling of how debilitating it can be. Did/does food actually

help when you get down?

> Following 's program gave me the " permission " to put myself and my

> happiness first and take great care of myself

>

That is such a good point. How is it working for you now? How did you find

's programme? (sorry, I'm English and spelling it the American way

feels so wrong ....)

I had an internal dialogue where I used to tell myself that being fatter

wouldn't help me deal with the situation - while binging of course. Such a

simple shift in perspective ... I have been listening and hearing this for

years but not internalised it before. I feel like I'm getting a real shift

in feeling this time round. Oh I do hope so, I've about 50 pounds I'd like

not to be carrying for many more years, and I really want for this to be

the last time I have need of shedding them. I've given my fat clothes away

three or four times now, swearing I would never be that size again.

> It seems that some extra self-care and self-love can help you... What can

> you do for yourself now? Who can give you the extra support you need right

> now?

>

Um ..... getting a swim in at least once a week, getting sewing and putting

my creations on ebay, going back to counselling but not the CBT, make music

and make the effort to go to the playing day next Saturday. Lots of things

that would be good.

Jenna, sending out warm supportive feelings to everyone here.