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Re: Social Isolation

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my child was like that since 3 and it continued up until 12. she is stuck in her

littlle world. we have tried many psch. meds. we are seeing a little improvement

since starting antibiotics a month ago for bartonella.

> My son is doing better OCD wise BUT he is isolating himself in his room on his

computer 24/7, this really concerns me he has friends at school but they are his

school friends he claims, a few them had him over their house during the school

year but they had to initiate it. I asked him to contact them to see what they

are doing and his answer is if they want to see me they will contact me, I try

explaining that thats not the way it is and he should try but he wont. I am

trying to get him to do things with us outside the house but everything I

suggest he doesn't want to do. Do any of you with OCD teens see this kind of

isolation pattern? Is it something to be overly concerned about? He never really

got along socially with the kids in our neighborhood they are out on a skate

board while he is talking science and computers it just didn't mesh I feel so

sad for him. He was like a 50 year old man at ten.

>

>

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I can't really answer your question, because my teen with OCD also has

Asperger's, which puts up a social barrier. However I've noticed the social

isolation gets much worse during periods when her OCD/anxiety are at the high

water mark.

I wonder whether, even though your son is doing better OCD wise, he is still

suppressing some intrusive thoughts or compulsions? If so, the extra energy that

requires may be tiring him a bit.

Another thought: what is he doing while he's on the computer? Does he

communicate with friends that way? It could be that this IS his social outlet

right now, and I think that's legitimate. In this day and age, face to face

contact is only one way to socialize.

On the other hand, it may have been a tiring school year, socially and in other

ways, and he might just need some down time.

Just some thoughts. :-) Please keep us posted.

Steph (17 y/o dd with OCD, anxiety/depression, Asperger's & NVLD)

>

> My son is doing better OCD wise BUT he is isolating himself in his room on his

computer 24/7, this really concerns me he has friends at school but they are his

school friends he claims, a few them had him over their house during the school

year but they had to initiate it. I asked him to contact them to see what they

are doing and his answer is if they want to see me they will contact me, I try

explaining that thats not the way it is and he should try but he wont. I am

trying to get him to do things with us outside the house but everything I

suggest he doesn't want to do. Do any of you with OCD teens see this kind of

isolation pattern? Is it something to be overly concerned about? He never really

got along socially with the kids in our neighborhood they are out on a skate

board while he is talking science and computers it just didn't mesh I feel so

sad for him. He was like a 50 year old man at ten.

>

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Hello,

During my son's worst OCD and for about 1-2 years after (he's now almost 18), he

didn't have much social contact with friends his age. In time, however, this

problem has gradually resolved and he now has a set of friends he sees often.

I'm not exactly sure how this resolved but I do think it was simply time - the

more time that passed between his worst OCD and the present, the better he got.

OCD kept him down in so many ways and once we resolved that (through ERP) we

were able to work on the other issues of life. One thing that did help us,

however, was for me to spend a lot of time with him. I went to movies with him,

watched rented movies with him, and took him just about any place he wanted to

go. This seemed to help - just him and me doing what he wanted to do.

Hope this helps.

Joni

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He could also have Asperger's.  Asperger's commonly goes along with OCD.  My

girls have both.  Many Aspies get obsessed with computers and want to spend all

day on the computer or playing video games.

 

Misty

>To:

>Sent: Sunday, July 10, 2011 12:00 AM

>Subject: Social Isolation

>

>

> 

>My son is doing better OCD wise BUT he is isolating himself in his room on his

computer 24/7, this really concerns me he has friends at school but they are his

school friends he claims, a few them had him over their house during the school

year but they had to initiate it. I asked him to contact them to see what they

are doing and his answer is if they want to see me they will contact me, I try

explaining that thats not the way it is and he should try but he wont. I am

trying to get him to do things with us outside the house but everything I

suggest he doesn't want to do. Do any of you with OCD teens see this kind of

isolation pattern? Is it something to be overly concerned about? He never really

got along socially with the kids in our neighborhood they are out on a skate

board while he is talking science and computers it just didn't mesh I feel so

sad for him. He was like a 50 year old man at ten.

>

>

>

>

>

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Our son used the computer, along with video games to help him keep his mind

distracted when his OCD was really bad.

But, this kind of behavior can be a typical kid behavior too. Especially for

boys. Many or our son's friends are science and computer geeks too, so they all

sit around on electronic devices. . Sometimes together, but sometimes at

different places playing online games together or texting each other.

It could be he just has different interests than the skate board kids.

Do you think he is using it to escape his OCD? Just curious.

BJ

>

> My son is doing better OCD wise BUT he is isolating himself in his room on his

computer 24/7, this really concerns me he has friends at school but they are his

school friends he claims, a few them had him over their house during the school

year but they had to initiate it. I asked him to contact them to see what they

are doing and his answer is if they want to see me they will contact me, I try

explaining that thats not the way it is and he should try but he wont. I am

trying to get him to do things with us outside the house but everything I

suggest he doesn't want to do. Do any of you with OCD teens see this kind of

isolation pattern? Is it something to be overly concerned about? He never really

got along socially with the kids in our neighborhood they are out on a skate

board while he is talking science and computers it just didn't mesh I feel so

sad for him. He was like a 50 year old man at ten.

>

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That's my daughter's main activity this summer - sitting in her room with the

computer. One thing my husband did a couple of years ago to help my daughter

socialize is to start a DND (dungeons and dragons) game at our house. It took

her a while, but she invited a girl from our neighborhood and school that she

had been doing karate with for a while, that plus her best friend. Eventually

other people heard about it and wanted to join. This is a lot of work for my DH

but it's good for DD. I buy lots of teen friendly foods (pizza, chips) and DD

makes homemade cookies. The group is falling apart now, as two people have

graduated and are moving away. We already have her best friend skype in to

attend (she moved away last year.) She also comes out of her room to play the

Wii with her little brothers.

My daughter is not social either - she has her best friend in another state, DND

games, and that's about it. Last year she was able to tag along with her DND

friend from the neighborhood, and sit with her and others at lunch.

My daughter likes to talk physics and science also - she often throws

interesting facts our way.

>

> My son is doing better OCD wise BUT he is isolating himself in his room on his

computer 24/7, this really concerns me he has friends at school but they are his

school friends he claims, a few them had him over their house during the school

year but they had to initiate it. I asked him to contact them to see what they

are doing and his answer is if they want to see me they will contact me, I try

explaining that thats not the way it is and he should try but he wont. I am

trying to get him to do things with us outside the house but everything I

suggest he doesn't want to do. Do any of you with OCD teens see this kind of

isolation pattern? Is it something to be overly concerned about? He never really

got along socially with the kids in our neighborhood they are out on a skate

board while he is talking science and computers it just didn't mesh I feel so

sad for him. He was like a 50 year old man at ten.

>

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That's my daughter's main activity this summer - sitting in her room with the

computer. One thing my husband did a couple of years ago to help my daughter

socialize is to start a DND (dungeons and dragons) game at our house. It took

her a while, but she invited a girl from our neighborhood and school that she

had been doing karate with for a while, that plus her best friend. Eventually

other people heard about it and wanted to join. This is a lot of work for my DH

but it's good for DD. I buy lots of teen friendly foods (pizza, chips) and DD

makes homemade cookies. The group is falling apart now, as two people have

graduated and are moving away. We already have her best friend skype in to

attend (she moved away last year.) She also comes out of her room to play the

Wii with her little brothers.

My daughter is not social either - she has her best friend in another state, DND

games, and that's about it. Last year she was able to tag along with her DND

friend from the neighborhood, and sit with her and others at lunch.

My daughter likes to talk physics and science also - she often throws

interesting facts our way.

>

> My son is doing better OCD wise BUT he is isolating himself in his room on his

computer 24/7, this really concerns me he has friends at school but they are his

school friends he claims, a few them had him over their house during the school

year but they had to initiate it. I asked him to contact them to see what they

are doing and his answer is if they want to see me they will contact me, I try

explaining that thats not the way it is and he should try but he wont. I am

trying to get him to do things with us outside the house but everything I

suggest he doesn't want to do. Do any of you with OCD teens see this kind of

isolation pattern? Is it something to be overly concerned about? He never really

got along socially with the kids in our neighborhood they are out on a skate

board while he is talking science and computers it just didn't mesh I feel so

sad for him. He was like a 50 year old man at ten.

>

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