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Hi,

This may seem like a weird question but I'm not sure on what to do...we are

being given a free bunk bed by someone in our family. At first my daughter with

OCD was excited but now she is having anxiety about her room changing. Now she

keeps saying she doesn't want them with her sister. So do I make her get the

bunk bed to have her sister move in her room and possibly cause her distress, or

do I not give in to the OCD and make her get them? This may seem like a silly

situation but I am trying to avoid her having more anxiety causing her more

compulsions. Thoughts someone????

Sent from my iPhone

> Rhonda,

>

> If I were you, I would try the emergency room if that's what you must do to

get him into treatment. If your son has urinated repeatedly in his jeans without

showering or changing them, he could easily have skin, fungal, or urinary

infections and you might not be aware. Our dd struggles with being wet at night

and not cleaning her personal areas thoroughly. She has had recurrent yeast

infections (until I put her on Lactobacillus tablets) and recurrent urinary

tract infections. She also went through a period three years ago when she would

only use the bathroom twice a day. At that time, she was washing for an hour

each time and her arms looked like she had suffered burns (the skin was so raw).

>

> I find it hard to believe that any experienced OCD treatment center would

forcefully change a patient. I can imagine them limiting privileges or devising

exposures to deal with the clothing issue and requiring the patient to have

clean clothing available.

>

> I also think your son may be right that he could do some things at the ER or

the hotel that he cannot do at home. OCD is a tricky disorder. People with OCD

can often manage things in public that they cannot do in private/at home. We

can cover rituals up sometimes if people are visiting. We can also play mind

games with our OCD. When my own OCD was worst over 20 yrs ago, I could not plan

an overnight or longer trip away from my apartment. If I did and then tried to

leave, the checking rituals would be both exhausting and time consuming. If I

told myself I was just going to work and did not pack anything, the rituals were

still there but not as bad. Once I got to work, I could call my parents and

tell them I had decided to come after all--and could I borrow a nightgown

(because I could not pack). I did this more than once, so at some level, I must

have known I might go away overnight--but I could not pack and prepare for the

trip in

> advance because that would make the rituals much worse when it was time to

leave the apartment.

>

> Best wishes, whatever you decide.

>

> (mom w/OCD, almost 12 yo dd w/OCD, 9.5 yo dd w/ tics and possible just

right OCD)

>

> ________________________________

>

> To:

> Sent: Friday, March 23, 2012 9:05 PM

> Subject: Re: Re: family rituals

>

> From what husband reports, Lindner Center wants clean clothes and will change

him if he is not clean. Because he is not in life-threatening situation, I don't

know if emergency room will even take, or Medicaid will pay.

>

> That is a great point about ER being used to all kinds of stuff. We're talking

he has peed out repeatedly over last 2-3 months because couldn't get hands

washed in time and hates going to bathroom, and has not changed those jeans.

>

> So I started talking to him about this process and he said he would be able to

shower and change at the ER! Really? It turns out that living here with his dad

is a HUGE issue, therapist never really validated. Son would put on new clothes

after showering but not clothes from home. If ER would not take him, he might

consider going to motel and showering and changing there, as long as he knows

he's on his way to the center. This is a boy who has not showered for six

months.

>

> He might be able to stay at motel if doctor orders lab tests and everything

takes awhile. I thought everything " out there " was dirty, but it seems it's

related to where dad has been and what dad has touched (like, it was just the

car seat that was dirty, not everything else.)

>

> He doesn't really know if the motel would " work " or not, in terms of feeling

clean enough and him being able to put on different clothes. Said he would think

about it. He's been up about 30 hours on this go-round and just took the

melatonin.

>

>

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