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Hi! I have an issue that has come up with my sons hockey coach. I want to know

what you all think about me confronting him. Last Thursday, he missed practice

because of a prior injury that has surfaced. he was having pain and I took him

to the doc. He called in saying he would not be there. Sat there was an evening

homegame that he got scratched from playing. When he asked the coach why he

didn't play coach told him it was because he didn't come to practice. My son

told him the doctor said to rest that night.Coach speaking: " I Don't Care, "

" I've played in pain before, and you should of come to practice. " Needles to say

he is upset as I am. I want to confront him but in a way that isn't going to

ruin it for my son. Can't pull him off the team since season has begun and is

paid for. Next year most likely won't return to this team. opinions appreciated.

I am going to his practice Monday night and was going to speak to the coach

after.

Thanks

Pam L.

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Would it help if the dr. wrote a note?

opinions needed

Hi! I have an issue that has come up with my sons hockey coach. I want to know

what you all think about me confronting him. Last Thursday, he missed practice

because of a prior injury that has surfaced. he was having pain and I took him

to the doc. He called in saying he would not be there. Sat there was an evening

homegame that he got scratched from playing. When he asked the coach why he

didn't play coach told him it was because he didn't come to practice. My son

told him the doctor said to rest that night.Coach speaking: " I Don't Care, "

" I've played in pain before, and you should of come to practice. " Needles to say

he is upset as I am. I want to confront him but in a way that isn't going to

ruin it for my son. Can't pull him off the team since season has begun and is

paid for. Next year most likely won't return to this team. opinions appreciated.

I am going to his practice Monday night and was going to speak to the coach

after.

Thanks

Pam L.

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I am usually inclined to speak up, but I don't think I would do so in this

case. Reason is, that what you describe is part of the culture of

aggressive sports such as hockey and football. Coaches don't strive to be

nurturing or even fair. To them, it's all about 'manning up', pushing past

the pain, 'no pain, no gain', etc. In that context, the comment he made to

your son is the same one he would have made to any player. With this sort

of mentality, the coach is going to assume you're trying to 'baby' your ds

(not that I agree, but it's what he's going to think) and may just end up

being tougher on your ds.

Maybe there are

some kids' teams that create more positive atmosphere. But a hardline,

traditional coach like this one is not likely to be responsive to any

dissent. Now, if you feel you're not getting what you were expecting, maybe

you could take it up with the team organizers and possibly ask for a refund

(I'm sure they are strict about no refunds, but given your ds'

special needs it may be possible to sway

them if they get the impression that you could create some problems

for them in terms of disability harrassment claims and such).

Fay

> **

>

>

> Hi! I have an issue that has come up with my sons hockey coach. I want to

> know what you all think about me confronting him. Last Thursday, he missed

> practice because of a prior injury that has surfaced. he was having pain

> and I took him to the doc. He called in saying he would not be there. Sat

> there was an evening homegame that he got scratched from playing. When he

> asked the coach why he didn't play coach told him it was because he didn't

> come to practice. My son told him the doctor said to rest that night.Coach

> speaking: " I Don't Care, " " I've played in pain before, and you should of

> come to practice. " Needles to say he is upset as I am. I want to confront

> him but in a way that isn't going to ruin it for my son. Can't pull him off

> the team since season has begun and is paid for. Next year most likely

> won't return to this team. opinions appreciated. I am going to his practice

> Monday night and was going to speak to the coach after.

> Thanks

> Pam L.

>

>

>

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  • 2 weeks later...

I am probably too late on this one, but if he had an injury, I would NOT want my

child playing - BUT I would probably have brought him to watch practice, even

though he couldnt play.  That might have made the coach happy.

Sharon

________________________________

To:

Sent: Sunday, November 20, 2011 3:50 PM

Subject: opinions needed

 

Hi! I have an issue that has come up with my sons hockey coach. I want to know

what you all think about me confronting him. Last Thursday, he missed practice

because of a prior injury that has surfaced. he was having pain and I took him

to the doc. He called in saying he would not be there. Sat there was an evening

homegame that he got scratched from playing. When he asked the coach why he

didn't play coach told him it was because he didn't come to practice. My son

told him the doctor said to rest that night.Coach speaking: " I Don't Care, "

" I've played in pain before, and you should of come to practice. " Needles to say

he is upset as I am. I want to confront him but in a way that isn't going to

ruin it for my son. Can't pull him off the team since season has begun and is

paid for. Next year most likely won't return to this team. opinions appreciated.

I am going to his practice Monday night and was going to speak to the coach

after.

Thanks

Pam L.

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