Advice for getting son to Roger's

[Guest guest]

HI all,

With 's HOPEFULLY being about 2+ weeks away, I would love to get

suggestions on what you feel might be the best way to introduce the whole

situation to my son. He's almost 16, however he's regressed to a very childlike

state in recent months with all of his behaviors, and has always been a very

sensitive child.

Given the fact that he stresses and fixates on something that might happen an

hour from now, even something as simple as going to the store or even for a walk

outside, I can not imagine how he will react when he finds out that he's going

halfway across the country for a few months to live. The other BIG problem is

that he is so inside his head now that he honestly does not feel there is much

of a problem with his behaviors and lifestyle (i.e. urinating/defecating outside

of the bathroom; not taking showers, not brushing teeth, laying on floor for

hours, zero social life, etc.).

I have wracked my brain on a daily basis and vacillate back and forth constantly

about the " best " or " right " way to tell him that will a)minimize the

stress/trauma to him not make him think that it's because he is doing

something wrong or being " punished " c) just get him to agree to go, period.

I don't think it will work well if just my husband and I sit him down and tell

him this at home, but then on the other hand, I'm not sure how well it will work

to do it at the therapist's office either. My other thought was to possibly get

his MD, psychiatrist, therapist, my husband and I together to do a " soft

intervention " of sorts. He does *not* like the psychiatrist, is so-so about the

therapist, but really likes his MD.

Okay, now I'm thinking, maybe that would work. Maybe it could be just his MD, my

husband and I to introduce 's to him. Bottom line, I don't want him to

think he's being " punished, " that is a huge concern because he is so sensitive,

and especially because he is not capable of seeing or acknowledging the severity

of his condition or issues, and I'm afraid he will think he's being sent to

's because of his Tourette's/tics, which is not the case.

I also wonder, if we did do some type of " intervention " if it would be better to

have say his MD come to our house (if he would agree to), or to do it at his

office.

The other issues is that last summer he went to a sleep-away camp in NC. He had

been the previous year and absolutely loved it, but his Tourette's and OCD were

not yet obvious or bothersome at that point. This past summer when he went he

was of course A LOT more functional and stable than he is now and his tics were

pretty minimal, his OCD was barely even on the radar. He ended up having to come

home halfway through because he said he hadn't slept for 2 days. Not because of

anything other than he started this cycle of obsessing about not sleeping, and

then couldn't sleep.

From there, he went into a week-long episode of what looked like nacrolepsy,

constantly falling into walls, laying around on the floor for hours, barely

functioning. Had him to dr., and to hospital to test for seizures, etc., but he

was all clear. We and the doctors chalked it up to exhaustion and left it at

that. Then, 3 weeks later, the same thing happened again, but it was much worse

the second time around. He has not had another episode since, however he still

talks about the " nightmare " at camp. He fixates SO much on things, that I have

no doubt he will immediately think of the camp " nightmare " when he finds out

he's going to be living away from home halfway across the country.

I know, it's a very complicated situation, I have no idea how we're going to do

this. I can't even imagine how we'll get him packed, into the car and on the

airplane without having to tie him and gag him!!! Just kidding, of course, but

you know what I mean.

Would love to hear any ideas you all might have.....

Thanks!