Re: Bathroom issues cont'd!

[Guest guest]

Hi , only a minute now, and hate that the bathroom " problem " is also

outside the home. (Then again, guess that means he'll do it at , if he

can ever get there!) But what are some of his other OC behaviors? Trying to

see if anything links together somehow....

>

> Well unfortunately the bathroom issues we've been having with my son are not

just limited to home. I took him to see his therapist on Monday afternoon. The

therapist emailed me to say that after we left he had gone in the bathroom, the

lights were out and there was pee all over the toilet seat and on the floor. At

home, my son refuses to turn on the lights to use the bathroom and sometimes

won't bother lifting the seat, which results in the obvious. But I never thought

he'd do something like this out in public, especially in a restroom out in the

hallway of an office building, not like it was a private restroom inside an

office, but even then.

>

[Guest guest]

Hi , only a minute now, and hate that the bathroom " problem " is also

outside the home. (Then again, guess that means he'll do it at , if he

can ever get there!) But what are some of his other OC behaviors? Trying to

see if anything links together somehow....

>

> Well unfortunately the bathroom issues we've been having with my son are not

just limited to home. I took him to see his therapist on Monday afternoon. The

therapist emailed me to say that after we left he had gone in the bathroom, the

lights were out and there was pee all over the toilet seat and on the floor. At

home, my son refuses to turn on the lights to use the bathroom and sometimes

won't bother lifting the seat, which results in the obvious. But I never thought

he'd do something like this out in public, especially in a restroom out in the

hallway of an office building, not like it was a private restroom inside an

office, but even then.

>

[Guest guest]

Is is possible he has Asperger's syndrome with anxiety? This

sounds more like that to me (because you say he doesn't care).

AS kids/teens can't be reasoned with at all. I have had issues

somewhat like this with my AS daughter and poor hygiene.

I use behavior modification. My daughter earns 1 hours of

computer time for taking her medication. She has to go to

school to get the computer on from 4-6pm. She has to cooperate

at home with hygiene etc to get the computer after 7pm (another

1 -2 hours earned).

Since my daughter is now a teen I have had to call the

police twice in the last year for help enforcing this plan.

She doesn't want her computer controlled like this

but she has to take her medication, go to school (to earn extra

computer) and follow basic house rules (quiet and in bed by 10pm,

shower, teeth, no hitting Mom, no throwing stuff).

My daughter is in 8th grade, I do not have her doing any

homework. He workload at school is scaled back.

And she can take a mental health day if she needs it

provided she keeps to her sleep schedule.

Good luck,

Pam .

Does he have interests? Hobbies? Does he like the computer?

I hope so. I have to

>

> Well unfortunately the bathroom issues we've been having with my son are not

just limited to home. I took him to see his therapist on Monday afternoon. The

therapist emailed me to say that after we left he had gone in the bathroom, the

lights were out and there was pee all over the toilet seat and on the floor. At

home, my son refuses to turn on the lights to use the bathroom and sometimes

won't bother lifting the seat, which results in the obvious. But I never thought

he'd do something like this out in public, especially in a restroom out in the

hallway of an office building, not like it was a private restroom inside an

office, but even then.

>

> Then last night, my husband found poop all over the toilet seat. Why? My son

said he had to go really bad but did it standing up, in the dark of course!! I

don't recall if I posted about what happened on Tuesday, but I found that he had

pooped in a paper towel in the dining room, threw it in the garbage in the

garage and left soiled paper towels he had wiped himself with on the dining room

floor and in the kitchen trash can!!

>

> I've contacted the head of his school to let her know what is going on because

I'm now concerned he may be leaving messes in the bathroom at school as well.

It's a really small private school and the bathrooms are just one stall or

urinal inside of a locked door.

>

> The biggest dilemma with all of this is that he just plain does not care,

period. He basically shrugs his shoulders and that's that. However, I do think

he'll care when the therapist confronts him on what happened at his office, but

I'm sure he'll give all sorts of bs excuses as to why that happened. The

therapist is going to also bring up what's been happening at home with the

bathroom, so I'm hoping this will help to minimize occurrences moving forward.

>

> To have an almost 16 year old teenager doing this sort of thing is beyond

upsetting and frustrating. If he were walking around in a catatonic state or

otherwise seriously impaired, then of course it would be understandable, but

that is absolutely not the case.

>

> I pray that 's has an opening asap, they keep telling me " a few more

weeks " and he's been on the wait list since mid November!!

>

>

>

[Guest guest]

Hi

As far as his other behaviors, it's hard to know for sure what is OC and what

isn't, but he refuses to go in any bathroom to do anything at all with lights

on, eats meals in the dark, constantly turning lights off in whatever room he is

in even if someone else is in there who needs the lights on. Doesn't want to

hear certain words (negative of positive). For example, can't say " Whole Foods

Market, " (too exciting) LA, NY, CA (too exciting) wants us to say " the place "

instead of school, and there are several others. Has expressed some

superstitious thoughts, but pretty minimal. Won't take showers or baths, only

will brush his teeth in kitchen sink, not in bathrooms.

He also has pretty severe Tourette's syndrome, so in his case some of the above

he avoids because it causes him stress (negative or positive) and exacerbates

his tics. However, it's pretty clear that his OCD/anxiety is what is driving a

lot of his tics, and in some cases his tics sort of merge with OCD and

visa-versa (i.e. having to do a screeching tic until he gets a certain sound

it).

> Hi , only a minute now, and hate that the bathroom " problem " is also

outside the home. (Then again, guess that means he'll do it at , if he can

ever get there!) But what are some of his other OC behaviors? Trying to see if

anything links together somehow....

>

>

>

>

> >

> > Well unfortunately the bathroom issues we've been having with my son are not

just limited to home. I took him to see his therapist on Monday afternoon. The

therapist emailed me to say that after we left he had gone in the bathroom, the

lights were out and there was pee all over the toilet seat and on the floor. At

home, my son refuses to turn on the lights to use the bathroom and sometimes

won't bother lifting the seat, which results in the obvious. But I never thought

he'd do something like this out in public, especially in a restroom out in the

hallway of an office building, not like it was a private restroom inside an

office, but even then.

> >

>

>

[Guest guest]

Pamela,

It is possible there is some Asperger's and autism, but it's hard to say for

sure. None of his therapists or psychiatrists have ever suggested these things,

but he has so many different things going on that I think anything is possible.

He does have Tourette's syndrome.

> Is is possible he has Asperger's syndrome with anxiety? This

> sounds more like that to me (because you say he doesn't care).

> AS kids/teens can't be reasoned with at all. I have had issues

> somewhat like this with my AS daughter and poor hygiene.

>

> I use behavior modification. My daughter earns 1 hours of

> computer time for taking her medication. She has to go to

> school to get the computer on from 4-6pm. She has to cooperate

> at home with hygiene etc to get the computer after 7pm (another

> 1 -2 hours earned).

>

> Since my daughter is now a teen I have had to call the

> police twice in the last year for help enforcing this plan.

>

> She doesn't want her computer controlled like this

> but she has to take her medication, go to school (to earn extra

> computer) and follow basic house rules (quiet and in bed by 10pm,

> shower, teeth, no hitting Mom, no throwing stuff).

>

> My daughter is in 8th grade, I do not have her doing any

> homework. He workload at school is scaled back.

> And she can take a mental health day if she needs it

> provided she keeps to her sleep schedule.

>

> Good luck,

>

> Pam .

>

> Does he have interests? Hobbies? Does he like the computer?

> I hope so. I have to

>

> >

> > Well unfortunately the bathroom issues we've been having with my son are not

just limited to home. I took him to see his therapist on Monday afternoon. The

therapist emailed me to say that after we left he had gone in the bathroom, the

lights were out and there was pee all over the toilet seat and on the floor. At

home, my son refuses to turn on the lights to use the bathroom and sometimes

won't bother lifting the seat, which results in the obvious. But I never thought

he'd do something like this out in public, especially in a restroom out in the

hallway of an office building, not like it was a private restroom inside an

office, but even then.

> >

> > Then last night, my husband found poop all over the toilet seat. Why? My son

said he had to go really bad but did it standing up, in the dark of course!! I

don't recall if I posted about what happened on Tuesday, but I found that he had

pooped in a paper towel in the dining room, threw it in the garbage in the

garage and left soiled paper towels he had wiped himself with on the dining room

floor and in the kitchen trash can!!

> >

> > I've contacted the head of his school to let her know what is going on

because I'm now concerned he may be leaving messes in the bathroom at school as

well. It's a really small private school and the bathrooms are just one stall or

urinal inside of a locked door.

> >

> > The biggest dilemma with all of this is that he just plain does not care,

period. He basically shrugs his shoulders and that's that. However, I do think

he'll care when the therapist confronts him on what happened at his office, but

I'm sure he'll give all sorts of bs excuses as to why that happened. The

therapist is going to also bring up what's been happening at home with the

bathroom, so I'm hoping this will help to minimize occurrences moving forward.

> >

> > To have an almost 16 year old teenager doing this sort of thing is beyond

upsetting and frustrating. If he were walking around in a catatonic state or

otherwise seriously impaired, then of course it would be understandable, but

that is absolutely not the case.

> >

> > I pray that 's has an opening asap, they keep telling me " a few more

weeks " and he's been on the wait list since mid November!!

> >

> >

> >

>

>

[Guest guest]

Two more thoughts....Has medicine given him any relief?

I doubt your son doesn't care - I have a feeling that the OCD is pushing him

around so much - he feels that he has no choice - something in the bathroom is

so upsetting...I think the dimmed lights helps mask something that triggers

anxiety for him. I just really think he can't help himself.

But I know its upsetting - It will get better & you will all wonder how you got

through it - but you will.

>

> Well unfortunately the bathroom issues we've been having with my son are not

just limited to home. I took him to see his therapist on Monday afternoon. The

therapist emailed me to say that after we left he had gone in the bathroom, the

lights were out and there was pee all over the toilet seat and on the floor. At

home, my son refuses to turn on the lights to use the bathroom and sometimes

won't bother lifting the seat, which results in the obvious. But I never thought

he'd do something like this out in public, especially in a restroom out in the

hallway of an office building, not like it was a private restroom inside an

office, but even then.

>

> Then last night, my husband found poop all over the toilet seat. Why? My son

said he had to go really bad but did it standing up, in the dark of course!! I

don't recall if I posted about what happened on Tuesday, but I found that he had

pooped in a paper towel in the dining room, threw it in the garbage in the

garage and left soiled paper towels he had wiped himself with on the dining room

floor and in the kitchen trash can!!

>

> I've contacted the head of his school to let her know what is going on because

I'm now concerned he may be leaving messes in the bathroom at school as well.

It's a really small private school and the bathrooms are just one stall or

urinal inside of a locked door.

>

> The biggest dilemma with all of this is that he just plain does not care,

period. He basically shrugs his shoulders and that's that. However, I do think

he'll care when the therapist confronts him on what happened at his office, but

I'm sure he'll give all sorts of bs excuses as to why that happened. The

therapist is going to also bring up what's been happening at home with the

bathroom, so I'm hoping this will help to minimize occurrences moving forward.

>

> To have an almost 16 year old teenager doing this sort of thing is beyond

upsetting and frustrating. If he were walking around in a catatonic state or

otherwise seriously impaired, then of course it would be understandable, but

that is absolutely not the case.

>

> I pray that 's has an opening asap, they keep telling me " a few more

weeks " and he's been on the wait list since mid November!!

>

>

>

[Guest guest]

I agree with looking at the meds. and seeing if you can get the anxiety down. At

work, we have kids that do this sort of thing with the bathroom at school and

out in public. Not sure why they do it but think it is some way to feel in

control- eating and toileting. I was anorexic in HS. Alot of chaos at home and

worries about life after HS. Stopped eating to gain control of anxiety but then

comes the irony. I then felt totally controlled by the obsession to not eat. I

agree that he prob. does not have control anymore and the OCD has taken over

him. No one stepped in to help me but it got a little better when I got out of

the house.It is a horrible feeling to feel so out of control. He has prob. given

up hope when he shrugs his shoulders. It is good you are trying to help him,

even if it feels like he isn't responding. He still knows you are there for him.

Do you have any family members that could help out and give you some respite? I

hope it gets better for you.

> >

> > Well unfortunately the bathroom issues we've been having with my son are not

just limited to home. I took him to see his therapist on Monday afternoon. The

therapist emailed me to say that after we left he had gone in the bathroom, the

lights were out and there was pee all over the toilet seat and on the floor. At

home, my son refuses to turn on the lights to use the bathroom and sometimes

won't bother lifting the seat, which results in the obvious. But I never thought

he'd do something like this out in public, especially in a restroom out in the

hallway of an office building, not like it was a private restroom inside an

office, but even then.

> >

> > Then last night, my husband found poop all over the toilet seat. Why? My son

said he had to go really bad but did it standing up, in the dark of course!! I

don't recall if I posted about what happened on Tuesday, but I found that he had

pooped in a paper towel in the dining room, threw it in the garbage in the

garage and left soiled paper towels he had wiped himself with on the dining room

floor and in the kitchen trash can!!

> >

> > I've contacted the head of his school to let her know what is going on

because I'm now concerned he may be leaving messes in the bathroom at school as

well. It's a really small private school and the bathrooms are just one stall or

urinal inside of a locked door.

> >

> > The biggest dilemma with all of this is that he just plain does not care,

period. He basically shrugs his shoulders and that's that. However, I do think

he'll care when the therapist confronts him on what happened at his office, but

I'm sure he'll give all sorts of bs excuses as to why that happened. The

therapist is going to also bring up what's been happening at home with the

bathroom, so I'm hoping this will help to minimize occurrences moving forward.

> >

> > To have an almost 16 year old teenager doing this sort of thing is beyond

upsetting and frustrating. If he were walking around in a catatonic state or

otherwise seriously impaired, then of course it would be understandable, but

that is absolutely not the case.

> >

> > I pray that 's has an opening asap, they keep telling me " a few more

weeks " and he's been on the wait list since mid November!!

> >

> >

> >

>

[Guest guest]

, I wish he was open to working on some of these things. For instance,

maybe working on words might be easiest to start with, if he were willing. You

may have seen this before, and not really helpful so far as your son's

particualr behaviors, but found this on " Tourettic OCD " -

http://www.ocfoundation.org/EO_TS.aspx#Top

Also sounds like the right medication/combo could really help. Again, hope

calls soon!!!

>

> Hi

>

> As far as his other behaviors, it's hard to know for sure what is OC and what

isn't, but he refuses to go in any bathroom to do anything at all with lights

on, eats meals in the dark, constantly turning lights off in whatever room he is

in even if someone else is in there who needs the lights on. Doesn't want to

hear certain words (negative of positive). For example, can't say " Whole Foods

Market, " (too exciting) LA, NY, CA (too exciting) wants us to say " the place "

[Guest guest]

, I wish he was open to working on some of these things. For instance,

maybe working on words might be easiest to start with, if he were willing. You

may have seen this before, and not really helpful so far as your son's

particualr behaviors, but found this on " Tourettic OCD " -

http://www.ocfoundation.org/EO_TS.aspx#Top

Also sounds like the right medication/combo could really help. Again, hope

calls soon!!!

>

> Hi

>

> As far as his other behaviors, it's hard to know for sure what is OC and what

isn't, but he refuses to go in any bathroom to do anything at all with lights

on, eats meals in the dark, constantly turning lights off in whatever room he is

in even if someone else is in there who needs the lights on. Doesn't want to

hear certain words (negative of positive). For example, can't say " Whole Foods

Market, " (too exciting) LA, NY, CA (too exciting) wants us to say " the place "

[Guest guest]

, I wish he was open to working on some of these things. For instance,

maybe working on words might be easiest to start with, if he were willing. You

may have seen this before, and not really helpful so far as your son's

particualr behaviors, but found this on " Tourettic OCD " -

http://www.ocfoundation.org/EO_TS.aspx#Top

Also sounds like the right medication/combo could really help. Again, hope

calls soon!!!

>

> Hi

>

> As far as his other behaviors, it's hard to know for sure what is OC and what

isn't, but he refuses to go in any bathroom to do anything at all with lights

on, eats meals in the dark, constantly turning lights off in whatever room he is

in even if someone else is in there who needs the lights on. Doesn't want to

hear certain words (negative of positive). For example, can't say " Whole Foods

Market, " (too exciting) LA, NY, CA (too exciting) wants us to say " the place "

[Guest guest]

Thanks, Chris. I did see that article, in fact, my son has been to see Dr.

Mansueto in the past, wonderful man, very knowledgeable! I think Tourettic OCD

is definitely a possibility with many of these things. It's a tough call trying

to divide the two in some instances, but I'm sure they'll be able to sort a lot

of it out at 's.

He's been taking Lexapro for a few months now, also tried Klonopin and Intuniv,

but both seemed to have adverse affects. Hard to know if Lexapro is helping

much. My gut feeling is that if he can get the " right " therapist (s) at 's

who hopefully have a good bedside manner (this is key for my son!) then I really

think the therapy will help tremendously. I also think once they've had enough

time to work with him they'll be able to figure out what meds might be the best

fit. It's so tricky with Tourette's trying to find a med that works for

OCD/anxiety that won't cause more tics or other adverse effects.

I hope 's calls soon as well. He's been on the wait list since mid-November

and I've been very patient, but I finally got a little huffy with them yesterday

because they continue to be very vague and it's like pulling teeth to get much

out of them.

> , I wish he was open to working on some of these things. For instance,

maybe working on words might be easiest to start with, if he were willing. You

may have seen this before, and not really helpful so far as your son's

particualr behaviors, but found this on " Tourettic OCD " -

>

> http://www.ocfoundation.org/EO_TS.aspx#Top

>

> Also sounds like the right medication/combo could really help. Again, hope

calls soon!!!

>

>

>

>

> >

> > Hi

> >

> > As far as his other behaviors, it's hard to know for sure what is OC and

what isn't, but he refuses to go in any bathroom to do anything at all with

lights on, eats meals in the dark, constantly turning lights off in whatever

room he is in even if someone else is in there who needs the lights on. Doesn't

want to hear certain words (negative of positive). For example, can't say " Whole

Foods Market, " (too exciting) LA, NY, CA (too exciting) wants us to say " the

place "

>

>