New to group, and OCD

[Guest guest]

I wanted to do a quick intro and ask a few questions, as I'm new to the group.

My 8-year-old son was recently diagnosed with OCD/anxiety. I feel very lost and

scared right now. We are working through setting up all his treatment now, and

are struggling to figure out what all the right decisions are with that. I'll

give you some background on my son before I ask questions. We've always noticed

his " eccentric " behaviors, since he was a toddler. But there was nothing

extremely unusual and they always seemed to go away before they got to the point

of interfering with daily life. But the odd behaviors always came and went.

Counting, lots of hand-washing, repetitive " rituals. " But he has always done

well in school, been very social, not prone to tantrums or terrible behavior, so

none of these things seemed extreme or to interfere with his daily life. A

couple months ago we noticed the behaviors beginning to get more extreme, and at

the same time he was going through a phase where he was terrified something was

going to happen to my husband or I. To the point he'd break down and wouldn't

want to go to bed at night, really unlike him to cry and get really upset like

that. After a few weeks it subsided. We talked to his doctor, and she said

fear of death at his age was fairly normal, but if it didn't subside to bring

him in to discuss it. Again, it subsided. But his " cleaning " behaviors got a

little worse. A month ago we took a trip to visit family. My husband, daughter

(3-years-old), and I flew home after a week and our son stayed with my parents

another two weeks and then flew home with my mom. He was super excited about

his trip and getting to stay with my parents, and seemed to do very well at

first. He didn't act homesick and wasn't upset, but towards the end of the trip

he started worrying a lot about being clean, began showering more, got really

upset about having to sit on dirty things, and within just a couple weeks got to

the point where he was completely obssessing about specs of dirt, hugging his

family when we hadn't just taken a shower, or after we touched anything he

thought was " contaminated " (my word, not his). In just a few weeks things got

so completely extreme, it terrified us. I called his pediatrician and had a

long discussion with her. We then took him in to see her and he talked to her

about what was going on. Through that conversation and our conversations with

him, he told us how he knew it didn't make sense, but he felt like if he made

sure to stay clean and not touch dirty things, it would keep us all safe. The

level of thought he puts into it is unbelieveable to me. He asks questions, and

can trace someone's path through the house, everything they touch, take a

sanitary wipe clean everything up.

In so many ways, it feels like in a extremely short period of time, he is

absolutely slipping away from us, and it is terrifying. I can't stop crying, I

am so afraid of what the future holds. At the same time I am trying to be

logical and realize that these behaviors have always been there, they have

gotten gradually worse, he's just been hiding them. Now that its in the open he

isn't hiding them at much (good I guess). The doctor and therapists we've

talked to also feel that the trip away from us for the first time caused some

anxiety and the compulsive behaviors getting extreme had to do with him trying

to deal with that anxiety (which, from what I'm reading so far sounds like the

norm with OCD). So I guess what we're seeing is in the " normal " realm for a

child with OCD. It is all new to us, so it is just very unnerving and

difficult.

We've now talked with a few psychologists and gotten referrals to a couple

different programs for him. Our pediatrician recommended cognitive behavioral

therapy. But one of the better programs in the area uses a newer type of

therapy called " ACT " (Acceptance and Commitment Therapy). Both the program that

does CBT and the one that does ACT includes the whole family. We're also going

to take him to a psychiatrist who specialized is children with OCD.

But we feel like we're going through this blindly, not sure about what the right

programs are. We've also been reading a number of books our pediatrician

recommended. We are in the Seattle area, so if there is anyone out there who

can recommend great therapists in this area that specialize in children with

OCD, I would love to hear from you. Our pediatrician is being extremely

helpful, and the two psychologists we've talked with so far are as well, but we

just want some more data to make sure we're making the right decisions on

approach.

--Kim